Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Neubob on June 08, 2006, 01:54:58 PM
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So Zarqawi is dead... Now what?
Well, 72 virgins, distributed over the course of eternity, doesn't amount to much. In fact, if you divide an infinite period of time by 72, you still end up with an infinite period of time.
In short, our martyr is still averaging only 1 virgin per infinite. If, however, he's rewarded for his actions with all 72 virgins simultaneously, he's averaging one virgin per infinite, while permanently stuck with 72 nagging, sexually-inexperienced girls.
Furthermore, if said virgins somehow remain virgins (and thus deprived of the ability accrue experience) despite whatever sick, twisted acts of Islamic misogynism he tried to inflic ton them, all of his efforts will be for naught.
So, here's what you've got...
A man who most likely doesn't think too highly of women, spending the rest of time with 72 women who don't know, and are unable to learn, how to pleasure him.
With an image of heaven such as this, it's no surprise he was a jerk while he was still living. In fact, the act of being born had effectively doomed him to what many of us would consider hell.
Maybe Allah isn't quite as akhbar as we're being led to believe.
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Mmm...atleast for the rest of the world - 72 sluts will get you something you can atleast enjoy. Imagine for a second - 72 virgins, never been kissed. He bangs 1 - and she wants to be his g/f. But he's trying to be the player and go on to the next one. She steals his cell phone EIN and stalks him - moves on to 2, she's crazy too, and so on with 3, 4, 5, etc. By the end of it he's being stalked by 72 crazy *****es for eternity.
Yea, that is hell.
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Stop believing in fairy tales. Theres no magical land that you go to when you die.
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Originally posted by AquaShrimp
Stop believing in fairy tales. Theres no magical land that you go to when you die.
how do you know? but fear not in your heaven there will be 72 extremely well broken in sheep for your amusement.
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:lol I like, MORE MORE!
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Originally posted by AquaShrimp
Stop believing in fairy tales. Theres no magical land that you go to when you die.
Prove it.
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I don't know what's good with 72 virgins ... personnaly I prefer a (not too old and clean) hooker.
Sex without experience == BAAAAAAAAAADDDD
You remember when we were teens ?
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Religion is man-made. :t
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Personally I'd opt for 72 Bi-chicks. That way you could just dive into the pile.:aok
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Clooney said it best:
"Yeah, I think they believe in what they're doing and they're going to get 70 virgins after they die. But really, who wants 70 virgins? I want eight pros."
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Originally posted by AquaShrimp
Stop believing in fairy tales. Theres no magical land that you go to when you die.
Prove it.
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Why is it that in the scientific world, If I say "there is a magical land where you go after you die" I am required to prove it?
Yet in the religious world, if you say "there is a magical land where you go after you die" I am required to disprove it?
Belief is a strong thing I guess.
cheers,
RTR
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Two of my sister's friends died and after a few minutes were revived. They are now born again athiests.
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I'm with Shifty....I'll take 72 bisexual strippers over 72 virgins for certain.
I'd not go as far as hookers, tho...want experienced, not worn out. Besides, I dont wanna hafta pay for it in Paradise.
RTR...Now there's an interesting point to consider...
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Originally posted by RTR
Why is it that in the scientific world, If I say "there is a magical land where you go after you die" I am required to prove it?
Yet in the religious world, if you say "there is a magical land where you go after you die" I am required to disprove it?
Belief is a strong thing I guess.
cheers,
RTR
I said prove it because he is a twit and it can't be done. Aqua just needs another melt down so he can be banned again, I just was trying to help.
I would have said the same thing if he had said there is a god.
You can't prove it either way.
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Originally posted by Goomba
I'm with Shifty....I'll take 72 bisexual strippers over 72 virgins for certain.
I'd not go as far as hookers, tho...want experienced, not worn out. Besides, I dont wanna hafta pay for it in Paradise.
RTR...Now there's an interesting point to consider...
Now that you say that I checked ... and the proper translation of Courtisane is Courtesan ... not hooker :D
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Just give me one good hearted woman with a warm heart and a great sense of humor, it doesn't matter one iota what she looks like........
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH.....
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I'd prefer a few "companions". Maybe like this one: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1072555/
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This guy sums it up nicely... 72virgins (http://santoalt.com/videos/1510_72_Virgins.html)
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Consider this twist. He gets the 72 virgins, but he gets eternity as a eunuch so the virgins stay virginal.
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I like where this is going...
But here's a question:
Who's this aquashrimp fellow and why was he banned in the first place?
Come to think of it, I've been gone for a while myself. Whatever happened to Nuke, Staga and Airhead. Why are they no more and who are they now??
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Originally posted by Thrawn
Two of my sister's friends died and after a few minutes were revived. They are now born again athiests.
:rofl
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I would take 72 over 1 any day. Eternity with only 1 or with 72?
Hard choice.
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Well I hope the Islamic terrorist bastards find out the hard way. They can go to hell, without virgins or anything else. They chose and now they find out. No virgins, no anything. Hell is nothing. No existence, no thoughts, no remembrance...only non-existence, for ever and ever. Serves the ones who choose that path right.
Les
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72 virgins is a miss-translation, Muhammad did not speak Arabic, he wrote that martyrs would get lots of white grapes(rare at that time), when the Koran was translated into Arabic white grapes were miss-translated into 72 virgins.
enjoy your white grapes.
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Wait a minute......I thought it was 72 Virginians.
RTR
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Originally posted by john9001
72 virgins is a miss-translation, Muhammad did not speak Arabic, he wrote that martyrs would get lots of white grapes(rare at that time), when the Koran was translated into Arabic white grapes were miss-translated into 72 virgins.
enjoy your white grapes.
Just curious....
Was 'kill the infidels' perhaps a mistranslation of 'pin the tail on the camel'?
Would be a much nicer faith if that were the case... White grapes does seem like a much more dignified cause. Too bad the idiots that strap bombs to themselves are expecting to spend eternity in sin, not fruit and berries.
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Dirka Dirka?