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General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: nopoop on July 18, 2006, 02:11:36 AM

Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: nopoop on July 18, 2006, 02:11:36 AM
(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/71_1153048291_awesome.jpg)

This interview was recorded over a two day span on July 15th and 16th of this year. Through unnamed intermediaries a location was agreed upon for the interview. It is unedited.

nopoop:  Mr. Norris on behalf of all the pilot of Aces High I would like to welcome you to the game and thank you for the opportunity to do this interview. It is an honor.

Chuck: Thank you. It’s a pleasure to be here. Please call me Chuck.

nopoop: Chuck. on behalf of all the pilot of Aces High I would like to welcome you to the game and thank you for the opportunity to do this interview. It is an honor.

Chuck: You already said that.

nopoop: No I didn’t.

Chuck: Yes you did.

nopoop: NO I DIDN’T. I said Mr. Norris the first time and Chuck the second time.

Chuck: (To his go-for)  WHO IS THIS GUY ???

Go-for: Mr. Norris ? That’s nopoop.

nopoop: Chuck, please call me poop. Everyone that knows me calls me poop. It’s sort of a nickname for a nickname kinda thing. People have called me poop as long as I can remember and I’d take it as an honor that you called me poop too…or…also.

Chuck: Okay….poop. (..looking at his go-for with a cold stare)

nopoop: Chuck please tell me and the many fans you have ingame how long you have been in Aces High.

Chuck: I’ve been online for fourteen months.

nopoop: That’s amazing. If I could, can I ask you what handle you fly under ??

Chuck: I would like to keep my handle secret if you know what I mean.

nopoop: Could you explain your reasons for that decision ??

Chuck: I’ve found that when it’s known that I am present I get inundated by PM’s because of my celebrity to the point that playing the game is impossible.

Nopoop: LOL yea right..

Chuck: WHO IS THIS GUY ???

Go-for: Mr. Norris ?? That’s nopoop.

nopoop: Chuck, please call me poop. Everyone that knows me calls me poop. It’s sort of a nickname for a nickname kinda thing. People have called me poop as long as I can remember and I’d take it as an honor that you called me poop too…or…also.

Chuck: YOU’VE SAID THAT ALREADY !!

nopoop: Why yes I have, you gotta problem with that ??

At this point the first part of the interview was cut short. Through negotiation the second part took place the following day..
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Furball on July 18, 2006, 03:11:35 AM
good job! can't wait for the second part!

please could you ask him what he thinks of his British fans?
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 18, 2006, 03:36:29 AM
Poop, (please, let me call you this way, since everyone who knows you calls you poop. Let's just pretend I know you. People have called you poop as long as you can remember and I’d take it as an honor that you let me call you poop too…or…also) I'd like to know if Mr. Norr... err...... Chuck enjoyed his staying in Rome, when he was beaten up by Bruce Lee in the Colosseo. :)

(http://members.aye.net/~gharris/blog/thumbs/wayofdragon01t.jpg)

Oh, and, btw, tell him he was as ugly as hell without beard!

QUAH!!!
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview Part II
Post by: nopoop on July 18, 2006, 03:37:26 AM
(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/71_1153048291_awesome.jpg)

The conclusion of the interview took place on July 16 of this year. As with the first interview it is unedited.

nopoop: Chuck, I would like to welcome you back and apologize for my actions on the first part of this interview.

Chuck: Ah...yep

nopoop: Chuck what drew you to flying an online flightsim ??

Chuck: It is in a way it's an extension of my martial arts background. I like to think of it as martial arts in the air.

nopoop: By that do you mean the “Chop..chop" thingy ??

Chuck: What ??

nopoop: You know..the keeeeeeeeHAI !!! Whossh whoosh KIAAAA !! thingy ???

Chuck: You’re a fuggin whacko.

nopoop: I am not…I’m medicated. They said if I take these pills I’m not a whacko. I NEVER MISS A DOSE.

Chuck:

nopoop: So tell me Chuck…what’s your favorite aircraft on the field of battle.

Chuck:

nopoop: Chuck..please, your fans want to know.

Chuck: I fly a La7

nopoop: BRUAHAHAHHAHAHA !!!

Chuck: What’s so fuggin funny ???

nopoop: Well…CHUCK…that’s a wussie plane..

Chuck: I find it in line with my superior martial arts skills.

nopoop: BRAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  Yea right..

Chuck: I’ve had enough, I’m outta here !!

nopoop: Chuck…before you leave would you mind explaining THIS ?????

(http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i170/Dablues/th405936867_l.gif)

Chuck left the building and no further contact with him could be made.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 18, 2006, 03:47:36 AM
Oh, no! I'd have really liked to know how he felt when Bruce knocked him down to death! :(
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: bagrat on July 18, 2006, 05:45:34 AM
See Rule #7
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Masherbrum on July 18, 2006, 05:46:14 AM
:rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Masherbrum on July 18, 2006, 05:48:03 AM
Quote
Originally posted by bagrat
See Rule #7


Timmay!
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 18, 2006, 06:02:59 AM
Quote
Originally posted by bagrat

See Rule #7


NAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!! Bruce is teh greeat!

(http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/2/Posters/PF2087~Bruce-Lee-High-Kick-Posters.jpg)

QUAH!

Respect teh masta! And watch the movie! :D
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: frank3 on July 18, 2006, 07:06:34 AM
Hahaha that's hilarious :lol

(the interview, not you Gain ;) )
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Whisky58 on July 18, 2006, 07:13:24 AM
:lol

Did you get a video?
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Mako15 on July 18, 2006, 07:23:21 AM
hehe funny stuff.....yeah old Chuck is a bit touchy about his martial arts...and yes, Bruce Lee does rock Gian :)
 (Chuck wants a rematch tho)
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: lazs2 on July 18, 2006, 08:21:57 AM
Chuck told me that they made him lose to lee because lee was a big star but that lee was really pretty clumsy and Chuck felt sorry for him anyway.   Chuck felt so bad he introduced lee to pot in an effort to cheer him up.

Chuck also wants all you fat, flabby AH guys to know that he has and excellent line of exercise equipment.

lazs
Public Relations Officer for the BK's
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: SirLoin on July 18, 2006, 08:23:12 AM
That was very Chuck E Cheesey

:rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 18, 2006, 09:03:33 AM
Quote
Originally posted by the Burger King P.R. guy

Chuck told me that they made him lose to lee because lee was a big star but that lee was really pretty clumsy and Chuck felt sorry for him anyway. Chuck felt so bad he introduced lee to pot in an effort to cheer him up.


That's plain BS! I saw the movie and analyzed it in slo-mo... Chuck lost to Bruce because he didn't shave his chest! That hairy pullover made the difference: he was smart enough to shave his face, but he underestimated the weight and drag of the hairs on the chest, so he was considerably slower and more sluggish than Bruce! The added weight and drag sentenced him to death!

Mako! Welcome to the craziest BB in the world, mate! See you here or online! (though I'm not flying that much in these days :) )
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: fuzeman on July 18, 2006, 09:05:54 AM
Funny, but remember...

"Chuck Norris enjoys a good practical joke. His favorite is where he removes your lower intestine and pretends to make a balloon animal out of it.
Then he cracks your skull open with a Volvo for not complimenting him on his balloon animal.
"

Quote
Originally posted by Gianlupo
Oh, and, btw, tell him he was as ugly as hell without beard!


"Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris. "
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Jackal1 on July 18, 2006, 10:08:37 AM
:aok :rofl

Chuckism.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Bronk on July 18, 2006, 10:13:40 AM
:rofl :rofl

Thanx for the laugh Nopoop.


Bronk
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Kermit de frog on July 18, 2006, 10:56:16 AM
You watch too much "Saved by the Bell" Nopoop

:rofl


Just so ya know, I left my tv on last night to awake to "saved by the bell" episode where they were interviwing chuck norris almost exactly the way nopoop wrote this.  

THAT IS A fluff'n COINCEDENCE.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Nomde on July 18, 2006, 11:36:41 AM
Hey poop... ifluff'n you don't mind me calling you poop, as I see everyone else has been, but i'd understand ifluff'n you just wanted me to call yas by the other name, but I seem to find the poop thing kinda more persoanl like... :D

anyways poops.... where have ya been? we've missed ya on the skinning team... :D
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: B@tfinkV on July 18, 2006, 12:00:38 PM
I SHOT DOWN CHUCK NORRIS!!!


not more than a month ago i shot chuck down in his spit9!!!



no chit!



i lock all my doors and windows now, and keep three treained kill gaurd dogs incase of recriminations.


I would also like to request that HT lengthens the ammount of letter for the CPIDs, 'SYSTEM: you shot down CHCKNRIS #1' dont look the same as the full name would.


'SYSTEM: You shot down Chuck Norris #1' would be sweet.
Title: Walker Texas Ranger
Post by: mojo7 on July 18, 2006, 12:17:01 PM
If Chuck Norris ever actually submitted a fact on this web site, it would be the last thing you ever read because it would literally come through the screen and snap your neck.

Vin Diesel
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: fuzeman on July 18, 2006, 02:00:22 PM
Quote
Originally posted by B@tfinkV
I SHOT DOWN CHUCK NORRIS!!!

'SYSTEM: You shot down Chuck Norris #1' would be sweet.


Careful there. Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

And I bet if you really killed Mr. Norris, seeing that mesage would be powerful enough to cause blindness.
Or Mr. Norris might even poke two fingers out of your screen into your eye's ala The Three Stooges and blind you. Either or, same result it blinds you.

Also, if Mr. Norris landed some kills I'm most certain the host system message would actually expand and say 'Chuck Norris landed XXX kills.'

Then again, when Mr. Norris enters an arena and doesn't like the map, the state of the war, the whining on ch200 he gives a roundhouse kick and boots everyone and resets the arena.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: daddog on July 18, 2006, 06:20:49 PM
Oh my gosh. That gave me the best laugh I have had in a month!

:rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: doobs on July 18, 2006, 07:09:24 PM
Too funny



:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: 332nd outlaw on July 19, 2006, 12:24:41 AM
Quote
Originally posted by fuzeman

Then again, when Mr. Norris enters an arena and doesn't like the map, the state of the war, the whining on ch200 he gives a roundhouse kick and boots everyone and resets the arena.


so your saying he is skuzzy :)


i wondered what he did for money now adays
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: gatt on July 19, 2006, 01:00:54 AM
Yeah, thanks for the laugh nopoop! :rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Ozark on July 19, 2006, 01:06:46 AM
Hey Nododo,

Give me a shout sometime. I need your help with some photos/art work.

Thanks... Oz
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: fuzeman on July 19, 2006, 08:29:52 AM
Quote
Originally posted by fuzeman
Then again, when Mr. Norris enters an arena and doesn't like the map, the state of the war, the whining on ch200 he gives a roundhouse kick and boots everyone and resets the arena.


Quote
Originally posted by 332nd outlaw
so your saying he is skuzzy :)
i wondered what he did for money now adays


Oh no!! Don't make me pick who's better. Why of course Skuzzy is!!!
Apologies to you Mr. Norris. In HTC's virtual world Mr. Skuzzy is a very powerful man. However in the real world I'm sure if Mr. Norris and Mr. Skuzzy met and had a disagreement, Mr. Norris would roundhouse kick Mr. Skuzzy so hard it would knock the grey out of his beard.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: fuzeman on July 19, 2006, 03:38:17 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Gianlupo
I'd like to know if Mr. Norr... err...... Chuck enjoyed his staying in Rome, when he was beaten up by Bruce Lee in the Colosseo. :)

(http://members.aye.net/~gharris/blog/thumbs/wayofdragon01t.jpg)



A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect.
When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.

Chuck Norris once invited all of the other badasses from TV to duke it out in order to see who was the supreme badass.
Only two showed up-- Jack Bauer and MacGyver.

MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus.
MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain.
Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: nopoop on July 19, 2006, 03:39:53 PM
LOL  :D
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: StarOfAfrica2 on July 19, 2006, 04:40:27 PM
Quote
Originally posted by 332nd outlaw
so your saying he is skuzzy :)


i wondered what he did for money now adays


You'd have to post pics of both for comparison.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 19, 2006, 05:21:07 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Fuzeman

A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect.
When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.


Hmmmmmmm...'kay, but, tell me... why did they have to use digital editing to erase Chuck's beard? Was that intended to give him a cover and avoid the shame that Bruce's victory would have shed on him? And, if so, what about the hairy pullover on his chest? Is that an expensive digital effect? :confused:

P.S. you made me laugh really hard with the second part of that post. Thank you! :)

EDIT: Oh, and, btw, what was Paraguay involvment in this troubled story?
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Panzzer on July 19, 2006, 05:22:29 PM
Hey Gian, it's getting late in there, go get some sleep. :p
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 19, 2006, 05:25:29 PM
LOL! I know, it is, but I don't wanna go!!!


PLEEEEEAASE daddy, another 5 minutes! :D
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Panzzer on July 19, 2006, 05:29:47 PM
Okay, you'll get 50 minutes..

;)
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Yoshimbo on July 19, 2006, 09:09:54 PM
:rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 20, 2006, 03:34:46 AM
Oh, man! I didn't read the reply and I went to bed! :cry
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: ozrocker on July 20, 2006, 08:37:58 PM
Great Interview! Can't wait for the Fat arsed Bastige Steven Seagal interview. He plays too. Although he doesn't fly. He only rides around on the cruisers and cv's, cause it's the only thing he can fit his blubber in/on.
                                                                         
                                                                          Oz
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: Gianlupo on July 21, 2006, 03:01:57 AM
Or he plays on cruisers and trains....
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: fuzeman on July 21, 2006, 12:10:03 PM
Quote
Originally posted by ozrocker
Great Interview! Can't wait for the Fat arsed Bastige Steven Seagal interview. He plays too. Although he doesn't fly. He only rides around on the cruisers and cv's, cause it's the only thing he can fit his blubber in/on.
                                                                         
                                                                          Oz


When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide.
When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
Especially for Krusty and Fruda.
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: BluKitty on July 21, 2006, 07:13:57 PM
Quote
Originally posted by fuzeman
When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
Especially for Krusty and Fruda.


I remember growing up in Texas and getting hognuts or deernuts cooked for me.  Pracitally force fed to me with the oh so humorus line of..... "The're great, you've just got to cook the **** out of them".


So I heard a Norris joke in a bar tonight.... is 'everyone' in on this AH joke? .. or  is Norris the 'new' joke everywhere?... remember ... you heard it on the AH BBS frist :rofl
Title: THE Chuck Norris interview
Post by: B@tfinkV on July 21, 2006, 08:10:03 PM
norris has been takin a pounding on these boards for a good 2 months at least :)