Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: DREDIOCK on August 16, 2006, 06:50:59 PM
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One pretty much useless cat.
Zero personality. only shows affection when hes hungry and out of food
Went to pet him and he tried to bite me.
Does the cat go for a swim in the pool?
Yay or Nay?
By swim. I dont mean drowning him
I mean gently lobbing him intot eh air and into the pool where he will then be allowed to escape
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You want to make him stop biting you by making him scared of you? And you want advice from this crowd?
Take him to a shelter, or give him away to someone who has more patience with a cat... and in the meantime, don't pet him.
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My sister has a little chihuahua. He is mean, growls at me when I try to pet him, barks at me everyday, and bites me. So one night when I got home from work, I put him in a pillow case and spun him around over my head a few times.
Hes still mean.
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Sorry your pet isnt the cuddly pile of love most are...if the cat just aint your thing, like he said, take it to the shelter. Dont abuse it/torture it
I was a volunteer at the local humane society for several years and seen a lot of really bad things.
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wet ***** is always teh friendlier
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HELLO????
This is a nobrainer...seriously. Throw him in!
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Originally posted by Dux
You want to make him stop biting you by making him scared of you? And you want advice from this crowd?
Take him to a shelter, or give him away to someone who has more patience with a cat... and in the meantime, don't pet him.
I have a wife, two kids, 2 dogs, 2 turtles an idiot for a brother in law who cant remember how to use a mouse or use mapquest after 6 months. and 3 cats. 2 of which are fine.
and while Im not a big cat fan. to begin with. in the last 20 years we have had no less then 6 altogether
Kindly dont try and tell me I have no patience.
this was a yay or nay vote Ill take yours as a nay.
but I will sweeten the pot.
Either the cat goes in the pool. Or simply lightly tossed in the backyard
with the dogs. which tend to get a bit exited at aything thats tossed into the yard
they wont kill it either, or even hurt it for that matter.but they will play with it for a while if it doesnt get up the tree or over the fence fast enough.
BTW my Chocolate lab can run faster then the cat :D
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Originally posted by LePaul
Sorry your pet isnt the cuddly pile of love most are...if the cat just aint your thing, like he said, take it to the shelter. Dont abuse it/torture it
I was a volunteer at the local humane society for several years and seen a lot of really bad things.
how is tossing a cat in a pool abuse? No worse an abuse then giving it a fleabath.
Really the worst that happens to em is they get wet. Its not like I beat em
And cats swim quite well;)
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I didn't say no patience, I said more patience.
Either way, it sounds like you already know what you want to do, and you're looking for a cheering crowd. Why else would you come here with this?
Toss away, Hero with the big grin. :D
Or nice troll.
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all in favor of putting DREDIOK on a big catapult and lobbing him at the side of a building say "aye".
;)
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chase it around the house with a vaccuum
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My ex had a cat that would poop on some of my sweaters in our closet. ONLY mine. After the second time it happened, I hunted down the cat, drove its face in it's own fecal waste so hard (or maybe just over and over) that it was sneezing poop for 20min. I firmly grabbed it, screamed at it for a few min 2" from his face, and IIRC bowled 'em across the hardwood and out the open back door. (he wasn't physically hurt in any way from this, but I sure as heck hope I scared it)
Gawd I hated that cat. Cost me a ton to get the sweaters cleaned.
And, it never again pooped on anything that was mine.
Who said you can't train a cat.
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A pet Carrier, a small bag of dry cat food... get as close to a bait shop as possible. open said bag of dry cat food spread it out on the ground and let the devil have his own.
There are many cats near bait shops seeking dead minnows and they survive. You just happened to have an Evil Seed.
Been there, Done That!
Mac
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I say throw 'em in the pool.
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Originally posted by JB88
all in favor of putting DREDIOK on a big catapult and lobbing him at the side of a building say "aye".
;)
AYE!
sounds like fun
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throw it in the pool, video tape it, send it to peta.
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Toss it in... make sure you get some altiitude under it first... better laughs that way.
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What's this "gently lobbing into the air" crap?!?!?
You should consult Hangtime's manual for cat punting, and then let the sucker fly right to the center of the pool!
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The ONLY use for a cat is wheel chocks.
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<-- agree's with JB88
would rather see the family dog thrown off the sears tower.
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Originally posted by CavemanJ
What's this "gently lobbing into the air" crap?!?!?
You should consult Hangtime's manual for cat punting, and then let the sucker fly right to the center of the pool!
did that to a cat we had right after we got married.
Never did a bad thing to the cat once and
Little Somonabish pissed on my pillow.
And this wasnt just any old pillow. This one one of those goose down $100 deals. and wre talking some 22 years ago it cost $100
Not only did he do it. but he did it while I was stranding right there.
Looking at me like it was his god given right to do so.
Cant even blame it on the litter pan as it was clean and he did use it.
So I was so pissed I grabbed the little basdad by his neck carried him outside and literally punted him.
And went back in the house.
Musta pissed off some other cat cause the last I ever saw of him was a little while later when I was walking the dogs (beagles at the time) Some big arse cat was chasing him all over the place.
Dunno what happened but the was the last time I saw him
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"I mean gently lobbing him intot eh air...."
Define "lobbing"?
(http://www.ux1.eiu.edu/~cxtdm/wkpic03/spud_cannon.jpeg)
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give your cat a ride in the blender:)
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Throw it in the pool and then dry it in the microwave.
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Take it to the shelter and forget it. Why keep it if you don't get along with the critter. Someone else may get along with it just fine.
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The ONLY use for a cat is wheel chocks
:rofl
I bet there is a book out there.... 101 uses for.....
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Did a compromise.
Let the dogs out into the yard then tossed the cat in the pool.
Beautiful picture perfect swan dive.
Went down about 2 feet surfaced. swam to the edge, jumped out. Narrowly escaped the dogs chasing him to the fence. Got over in the nick of time.
Man cats are skinny when wet.
Anyway. he ran under my workvan licked himself dry and 45 min later was meowing to come back in the house. Went and plopped himself next to the golden retreiver and went to sleep.
A little damp but
None the worse for wear.
And to answer the question
I keep him only cause my daughter loves him.
Most of the time he's pretty tame. just has no personality.
But I cant let him get away with biting me either.
And if I responded with my initial desire for action....well let just say it would hurt him more then me.
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Originally posted by PonyDriver
:rofl
I bet there is a book out there.... 101 uses for.....
actually I remember a cartoon book of "100 things to do with a cat" or somethign like that.
On the cover was a picture of a cat climbing up a metal screen door that had wires attached to it. on the other end of the wires was a guy holding an electrical switch and a big grin on his face as he was about to throw it.
Havent seen that book in about 20 years but I laughed hysterically when I saw it.
As for wheel chocks.
Several years ago my ssiter in law in a span of about 5 months accidentally ran over at least 4 cats.
So we got her a bumber sticker.
"Missing your cat? Check under my tires" LOL
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As you know, cats sometimes sleep inside car engine compartments to keep warm in cool months.
I was dating a girl named Ginger, one morning she got in her car to go to work, fired it up but heard a horrible clunking and howling. She turned off the car and got out... found that a cat had been sleeping in her radiator fan shroud. It was a belt driven fan so it ran whenever the engine was on.
I just hosed out the shroud and scooped the pieces into the garbage.
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I love my cats. The are the sweetest pets Ive ever had. I think children affect how they act. If brought up in a house full of kids they can be a bit twitchy. But there are no children in my house...peace and quiet...and they, and me and my wife love it.
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Sounds a lot like my tomcat, Buddy. I rescued him as a newborn from a litter found in a horse trailer in the middle of winter. The owner was going to thow him in the river. I needed a cat to combat field mice that were starting to show up in the house, his siblings were on their own.
I named him Buddy as in Little Buddy, Skipper's nickname for Gilligan. I should have named him Kato as in Inspector Clueseau's houseboy that would attack him everytime he entered a room.
When he was 6 mos old Buddy jumped out from behind a bookshelf to attack me and I promptly stepped on him breaking his right leg. I gave him 1/2 of an asprin and took him to the vet. Vet informs me asprin is poison to felines and doesn't believe my story of the attack gone awry.
6 months, 1 set of cat testes and a $400 vet bill later, Buddy falls off the side of my bathtub and re breaks the same leg in the same spot. "My cat fell in the bathtub" is not exactly what the vet wants to hear... $600 vet bill.
It's been a year since the last operation and I'm able to pick up and hold Buddy for up to 10 seconds (as long as I'm carrying him to his food bowl) before he goes Tazmanian Devil and draws blood now. He howls and hisses at anyone (especially female) that comes to the house. He leaves sheets of hair on the carpet and upholstery. He uses my $900 leather massage recliner as a sharpening post when I'm away and I'm pretty sure that I'm on some SPCA repeat offender watchlist.
I'd rather have mice.
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Our family cat was pretty smart... lazy-smart really. He never ran away from home, liked me enough to follow me to school, learned how to open up doors to come inside whenever he felt like it. Terrible fighter too, got his butt kicked by every neighborhood cat, skunk, or possum in the area.
Thing is, he had some sort of dominance thing going with my Dad. He somehow knew that my Dad was the dominant male, so he went out of his way to f**k with him. Everything my Dad owned got peed on. If my Dad changed the tire, the cat would pee on the hubcap. When my Dad started building an airplane, the cat peed on the aluminum (which normally cats won't do). Almost everything my Dad owned or did got peed on. My Dad tolerated the cat and even enjoyed his company whenever the cat wasn't peeing on his stuff, but the cat never did give up trying to settle who was in charge of things at home.
Still, he lived 15 years until he fell asleep under a car and got mooshed. Poor kitty.
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Regarding disciplining cats...
ALL cat discipline must be done immediately, and the best method I found in 25 years of cat ownership is to show dominance through non-painful capture and hold.
Simply put, anytime the cat did something bad, like bite too hard or play with claws out, I'd clamp one hand over his face to shut his jaw, and grab all 4 of his feet with the other hand. Start with the front paws and when he brings up his hind feet, grab them one at a time too. Best done kneeling so if necessary, you can trap him between your knees or under a forearm.
Capture/hold for about 30 seconds, speak in a soothing tone something like "no bite kitty", then release. If the cat doesn't just bolt and run, pet him a little to show no hard feelings.
Seriously, I trained 6 cats to behave in this fashion and not one ever had any serious discipline problems. One had a bit of a short circuit in her brain so anytime I moved my hand away from her, she'd go into attack mode and go after my hand like it was prey. Knowing this is an instinctive behavior, I never held it against her. I just did the capture/hold thing and after a while, she generally figured out her mistake in mid-leap and would land on my hand/arm without using her claws or biting, and then run off.
Punishing cats too long after the fact just makes them worse. They get paranoid and more independent (anti-social) and that doesn't make them very good pets. Instead of punishment, just subdue them physically without hurting them and they'll figure out that you're the boss. After that, they'll suck up to you like you wouldn't believe.
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Originally posted by eagl
Capture/hold for about 30 seconds, speak in a soothing tone something like "no bite kitty", then release. If the cat doesn't just bolt and run, pet him a little to show no hard feelings.
"No bite Kitty"? If a cat drew blood on me, I'd Lee Van Cleef his arse.
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It's just an animal. Demonstrate your superiority and benevolance, and it'll fall into line. Do you really think it has the exact combination of intelligence and suicidal stupidity to actually try to harm you?
Cats don't usually need as much attention as dogs but they do need to know 2 things. First, that they're part of the family. Second, that they're not in charge. Get that message across with firm kindness and most cats will fit into a family just fine. Demonstrate a lack of care or be inconsistent with them, and they'll go feral and then you have a real problem. Feral cats can sometimes be brought into the family but usually at best they'll accept a "mutually beneficial" relationship and won't tolerate a close relationship.
Want to be a cat's best friend? Feed consistently, play with string or a laser pointer if you're lazy, and pet whenever they're feeling cuddly. A spritzer bottle applied without malice usually takes care of scratching furniture and screen doors. If they bite, subdue and hold, then pet to show no hard feelings. A little teasing play is ok as long as you recognize when the cat is approaching it's limits and back off before the cat lashes out in frustration.
And realize that a healthy and well-adjusted cat will on occasion break the skin by accident when playing, because cats just naturally grow sharp pointy things and mistakes happen. Buy a tube of neosporin and apply as necessary, and get over it. That's what cats do and trying to train a cat to never bite or scratch is just going to result in a schitzo cat that is never friendly and can't be left alone with kids.
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^^^^^^^^
what he said.
:D
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My family had a cat that would steal chicken right off the hot barbeque. Throwing him in the pool a couple times cured him real fast.
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If the "feedback" is immediate, then sometimes the "toss" works. My cat used to like being indoors and we cured him of jumping onto counters by tossing him out the door. But it has to be immediate feedback or it just makes them neurotic.
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Originally posted by eagl
Regarding disciplining girlfriends...
ALL girlfriend discipline must be done immediately, and the best method I found in 25 years of girlfriend ownership is to show dominance through non-painful capture and hold.
Simply put, anytime the girl did something bad, like bite too hard or play with nails out, I'd clamp one hand over her face to shut her jaw, and grab both of her feet with the other hand. Start with the hands and when she brings up her feet, grab them one at a time too. Best done kneeling so if necessary, you can trap her between your knees or under a forearm.
Capture/hold for about 30 seconds, speak in a soothing tone something like "no bite sweetie", then release. If the girl doesn't just bolt and run, pet her a little to show no hard feelings.
Seriously, I trained 6 girlfriends to behave in this fashion and not one ever had any serious discipline problems. One had a bit of a short circuit in her brain so anytime I moved my hand away from her, she'd go into attack mode and go after my hand like it was prey. Knowing this is an instinctive behavior, I never held it against her. I just did the capture/hold thing and after a while, she generally figured out her mistake in mid-leap and would land on my hand/arm without using her nails or biting, and then run off.
Punishing girlfirends too long after the fact just makes them worse. They get paranoid and more independent (anti-social) and that doesn't make them very good partners. Instead of punishment, just subdue them physically without hurting them and they'll figure out that you're the boss. After that, they'll suck up to you like you wouldn't believe.
Fixed...
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heh.
nice rolex.
:huh
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Originally posted by eagl
It's just a girlfirend. Demonstrate your superiority and benevolance, and she'll fall into line. Do you really think it has the exact combination of intelligence and suicidal stupidity to actually try to harm you?
Girlfriends don't usually need as much attention as wives but they do need to know 2 things. First, that they're part of your harem. Second, that they're not in charge. Get that message across with firm kindness and most girlfriends will fit into a harem just fine. Demonstrate a lack of care or be inconsistent with them, and they'll go feral and then you have a real problem. Feral girlfriends can sometimes be brought into the harem but usually at best they'll accept a "mutually beneficial" relationship and won't tolerate a close relationship.
Want to be a girls best friend? Feed consistently, play with string or a laser pointer if you're lazy, and pet whenever they're feeling cuddly. A spritzer bottle applied without malice usually takes care of scratching furniture and screen doors. If they bite, subdue and hold, then pet to show no hard feelings. A little teasing play is ok as long as you recognize when the girl is approaching it's limits and back off before the girl lashes out in frustration.
And realize that a healthy and well-adjusted girl will on occasion break the skin by accident when playing, because girls just naturally grow sharp pointy things and mistakes happen. Buy a tube of neosporin and apply as necessary, and get over it. That's what girls do and trying to train a girl to never bite or scratch is just going to result in a schitzo girlfriend that is never friendly and can't be left alone with kids.
Fixed this too.
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Originally posted by Rolex
Regarding disciplining girlfriends...
ALL girlfriend discipline must be done immediately, and the best method I found in 25 years of girlfriend ownership is to show dominance through non-painful capture and hold.
Man I would love to respond to this but Skuzzy would have a nervous breakdown LOL as I would certainly be in violation of rule 7 at LEAST 6 times.
But as a quick reply we will start with the capture and hold. How painfull it would be would be directly related to how much she struggled.
I'll let your imaginations take over from there:D