Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: AWMac on August 31, 2006, 02:54:53 AM
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I was born 1958 in Toledo, Ohio. Had the bestest friend ever.
He taught me how to fish, taught me how to hunt. I still remember the day we pulled up to school and he said "Do ya wanna go to school or fish?" That day I out fished him on BlueGills. Fell into the river and ended up getting my first Levi's... 3 sizes to big, I was in Kindergarden at the time.
Told the best jokes that I've ever heard. Taught me everything from tearing down a bicycle and putting it back together again to splicing electrical wiring. Even building my own worm farm, I had bait for Months on end. He was a wiz at HVAC..if it had to do with airconditioning, pumps, feed tubes and outlets he mastered all of that.
He joined the Navy back in '51 and did a tour during the Korean War, him and his Twin. He left the Navy and worked at Libbey Glass for awhile...all the time biitching that he was wanting to be back on the sea. Well he worked the Great Lakes on the Edmund Fitzgerald as a boilers mate... still not satisfied he rejoined the Navy. We traveled from Ohio to California while he sailed 2 tours to Nam '66 ~ '68. He was on the DD 762 Ingersoll then... I remember hearing the phone ring so late at night and tears. Tonkin Gulf.
Then off to Washington State to where he was a plank owner on a new Destroyer Escort Class, DE1052 Knox as a Machinist Mate...home based in Pearl Harbour. It was great, he taught me how to snorkle and the beauty of the sea below. No Fear.
He Retired after 28 years in the Navy Senior Chief Petty Officer with Gold Stripes...I looked up to him with pride. I was in the Army by then and the Army/Navy Game ran up both our phone bills. He'd visit me and we'd sit and fish and hunt, talking about the good times.
Yesterday, Aug 29th, 2006 3:30 EST, I lost my best friend to congestive heart failure. He died alone in a nursing home room. GOD I wish I was there for him.
Dad, I love you and will miss you always! I'll raise Jake as you did me.
Thank you Dad for making me a Man.
mac
He will be interned at Arlington Natl Cem in the next week or so.. I'll be there for him. He will be there with his Twin and younger Brother.
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Very, very sorry to hear Mac. Sounds like a great man.
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Sorry for your loss Mac :(
My deepest condolences to you and your family.
I lost my mother but still have my father. Its always hard to find enough time for them, but later you wish you had. After my mother passed I have made an effort to spend more time with my dad, and Ive been with him for many weeks (including now) at the summer house this summer.
Take good care of your mother if she is still around, she will need it, and you will too.
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Thanks Slash. He was a great Father.
I can't sleep, have frog eyes now.
Might just sit in a Tower in MA and get drunk.
I have so much to do today and don't know where to start.
mac
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Thanks Nilsen... I'm just in a fog right now.
mac
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Originally posted by AWMac
Thanks Nilsen... I'm just in a fog right now.
mac
Dont worry about all the practical things you need to do. Im sure someone will give you a hand with those. Some like to get started right away to keep busy, but that just delayes the process.
Take all the help you can get and think about yourself and your kids. Allow them to comfort you if they wish to, there is no need to be the strong parent if you see that they are up to it. It can help them as much as it helps you if you let them.
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Sorry to hear about your Dad, Mac. My deepest condolences.
I lost mine about 10 years ago. I swear Hank's Dad on "King of the Hill" was based on my father.
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My kids took it hard...I tried like hell not to be emotional...that didn't last long. As soon as my Son started crying it was all hugs and tears.
mac
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Thanks RPM... it was not a thing of if it was gonna happen, but when. My Family has a knack for bad timing.
mac
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Mac, so sorry to hear that.
You are having a tough time lately my friend :(
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Dont worry about falling apart Mac. It shows the kids that its ok to do so. Staying too strong in this situation can be counter productive..
Stay off the booze tho. Doesnt help a bit.
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Furball in 3 1/2 Years I lost my Brother, a Niece and now my Dad...
GOD says he never gives you more than you can handle but I feel as though my plate runneth over a bit.
mac
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You know it's bad when you can't tell is it's tears or snot running down your face.....
mac
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Originally posted by AWMac
You know it's bad when you can't tell is it's tears or snot running down your face.....
mac
If you are not sure I dont recomend the taste test. Find some tissues ;)
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Naw it's Vodka....
mac
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sorry to hear the news.
best to you and yours and thiers mac.
88
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Thanks JB88...it's the hardest thing I've had to do in Life.
mac
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mine went two years ago september. i know whatcha mean.
sounds like a really great dad mac.
hang in there man.
:)
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Originally posted by JB88
mine went two years ago september. i know whatcha mean.
sounds like a really great dad mac.
hang in there man.
:)
Trying Bud...it's like everything gets mellow and then a memory pops in and the tears come back.
mac
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Just hang in there buddy. In the next few days you will find out who your real friends are and how much they care for you.
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Gotta call the Airlines today check on Breavment fares from Tulsa to Toledo and then again to Arlington. I might just call Tinker AFB and ask what they have going Eastbound seing as how I'm Retired Military. I'm sure after I explain stuff if they have a flight I'll get bumped up.
mac
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I agree RPM.... seen that before. Thanks Bud.
mac
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Mac,
Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
Minnow
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Sorry to hear about your loss Mac. I lost a parent and know what the empty space in your heart feels like.
to your father for his accomplishments, he was one of those who made a difference, rather than just taking up space, as so many people do in life.
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my condolences and thoughts go with you, Mac.
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So sorry for your loss Mac. He sounded like an amazing Dad.
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Mac, sorry to hear about the passing of a loved one. Condolences to you and your family.
He would appreciated the love in the eulogy you've written.
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<
> Mac truly sorry to hear about the loss of a parent. I know how tough it is. my heartfelt prayers go out to you and your family. may God be with you all in this troubling time.
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Condolences. Sorry for your loss.
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Mac, sorry to hear of your loss.
Chin up mate, I'm sure your Dad is watching you from a better place, with pride and love in his heart for the man you have become, the man he showed you how to be.
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Mac, I know this pain as well. Sorry for your loss.
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Originally posted by AWMac
GOD says he never gives you more than you can handle but I feel as though my plate runneth over a bit. mac
Mac, thats what friends are for, they pick up the over runneth part.
to your Dad and condolences to you and your family.
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Mac, my sincerest condolences. That was a great eulogy - says a lot.
asw
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Thanks guys.
Cried myself to sleep, a deep and painful cry. I just woke up, my eyes are so swollen and feel like two bowling balls. My throat feels like I was in a strangle hold.
So many things to do today and I don't have a clue of where to start.
Maybe a shower first.
mac
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Just go one step at a time man, focus on the little things to get started and let your routine take over. Take a shower, get dressed, choke down some chow, all the little things you normally do on autopilot. Just find something, ANYthing, to focus on. I wont kid you, it doesnt help. Much. But at least you wont show up in your undies. :)
Sorry I dont have anything more than words to offer you. I know how little they are to a hurt that big. All I can say is, just put in your mind the honor they are doing him to be buried in Arlington with his brothers. Focus on showing the world how proud you are. That has to be your job until its done. Prayers are with you my friend.
BTW, if you go through Tinker, and you meet a young guy named Lopez that has a Hawaiian accent, say hi for me. :)
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Good advice Star. Thanks Bud.
mac
a Hawaiian named Lopez? That's a new one on me.
I like pizza with pineapple on it, makes me wonder how a taco with pineapple might be like.
Ya know Star we might be onto something here.
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My best wishes to you and yours
AWMac
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Man sorry to hear that MAC
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Thanks Gunthr. It's gonna be some hard emotional times these next few Weeks, Months, Years.
They say time heals all wounds... seems like my heart has been stabbed to Death in the last 3 1/2 Years. Just learn from the scars that remain I guess.
I just feel beat to Death. Maybe GOD has a special reason to put me through all of this. I just don't know, it's all HIS call.
mac
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Mac, Im sorry to hear of your loss.
Hang in there, sounds like Dad raised a good son.
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Check your inbox.
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Mac my deepest sympathies to you and yours.
I know the feeling...as most of us do.
Not easy....life isn't.
Remember...your Dad has no worries now. And I'm sure he is quite comfortable.
Remember also that this is just temporary.
You'll see one another again someday!
:aok
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Excellent eulogy Mac, my condolences to you and your loved ones. Take it easy
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My heartfelt condolences AwMac.
My warmest regards and prayers. Shuckins
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Thanks Gunthr. It's gonna be some hard emotional times these next few Weeks, Months, Years.
They say time heals all wounds... seems like my heart has been stabbed to Death in the last 3 1/2 Years. Just learn from the scars that remain I guess.
I just feel beat to Death. Maybe GOD has a special reason to put me through all of this. I just don't know, it's all HIS call.
mac
My dad died 6 years ago. To this day, when I'm stumped on trying to fix something, I want to call my dad. I miss him. Carry on bro... .
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Thanks LePaul, Nirvana, Shuckins, Gunthr, Hajo <<
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Masherbrum, the talk helped me alot Bro. Thanks. <<>>
mac
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Mac....Lost my Mom a year ago this coming month. Prayers for you and your family. Best wishes man.:(
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Note: I tryed to send this PM and it was too big. No e-mail link, so here it goes.
All the best wishs for you and your family during this sad time bud.
I can relate to your loss and the statement of Dad being your best friend.
My Dad past away in July of `97, also of congestive heart failure.
We were truly best friends. We did pretty much everything together.
We stood by each other through good and bad times. Man I had my runs of bad times. (read that Outlaw)
Dad never gave up on me no matter what and it was understood in the family that we were a team and stood up for each other.
Family and friends expected a pretty well total meltdown from me when Dad passed away.
I was sort of in a unreal like state for a week or so. I just sort of muddled through and tried to be support for Mom and all the Grand kids who thought he hung the moon. I went about trying to put things in order for Mom and get her squared away. When I finaly ran out of things to do to occupy my mind.........I was at a total loss about how to deal with it. I basicaly just wanted to be myself or just me and my wife for the most part. Not much was said, but I could feel the eyes watching me, waiting for me to fall apart. I couldn`t. JUst couldn`t get a grip on it. I was pretty much doing a slow meltdown because I just didn`t know how to grieve for someone who was like a part of me. Wife kept telling me that I couldn`t keep it all inside or it would eat me up. I was just at a total loss.
Dad had wanted to go to Sturgis with me in `96, but he was recovering from a surgery, so he said "Cat, I`m definitely going in `97".
That is what finaly got my head out of my.......well you know. Along came August knocking on the door. It dawned on me while I was just kicking around in the shop one day and looked over at the the old scoot on the kickstand where it had sat untouched since the day Dad passed away.
I walked into the house and told the better half that I had to get away before I lost it. I asked her if she wanted to go to Sturgis which sort of surprised her since I hadn`t even mentioned it for the first time in a 5 year run of going. She said that we didn`t have the cash to go and hadn`t made any plans. I told her to answer the question and she said yes. Thirty minutes later I walked back in the door and threw 3 grand on the table and said "Pack".
When I walked back in the door from Dad`s funeral I took my coat off and grabbed both sides of the dress shirt I was wearing and just ripped the buttons off, threw it in the floor and said that I would never wear the SOB again. I asked wifey poo if she had saved what was left of it and she rounded it up. I took it to one of my daughter`s houses and told her I wanted an 18" by 27" piece cut from the back of the shirt and to seam the sides and ends to make a banner. On it she embroidered
STURGIS 97
In Memory of "Catmo"
This is the one you wanted to make
YOU MADE IT
1925-1997
Away we went straight through to the town of Sturgis S.D. Arrived around 7:00 A.M. , checked into Southside campground and went to our usual camp spot. I sat a beer cooler under a shade tree and there I sat and worked out what I had been needing to do with my wife as a captive audience. I went through my early years with Dad when I was a kid and all the great times we had that was still crystal clear in my mind. Went through the teenage years, good and bad and all the unbelievable crap I pulled and he never , not once, wasn`t there for support, help and to make it clear that two of us would be dealt with no matter what and no matter what came. Went through the after high school , short lived first marriage, then the outlaw years and how still he was there for me, right or wrong. From that point she pretty well knew the rest since that is when we started our yes we are/no were not then Yep we are, relationship which was a continuation of my outlaw years for some time. I finaly got down to the water works when I was trying to explain the emptiness inside I was feeling and how totaly terribly lost I was going to be without him. I explained how I had always been in awe of him and the fact that he hobbled around on both totaly screwed feet that he had acquired in the war without a complaint one. Not one. Never. He would work through problems quietly and always seemed to come up with a good solution to them. He enjoyed life more than anyone I have ever came in contact with. Everyone that spent more than an hour around him became instant friends. We went through all of this , sitting there on that beer cooler and I went through a few cool ones during the process. I can`t tell you how much it helped.
It was after Noon when I finaly got up, set up the tent, and placed the memorable banner directly over the tent entrance. We both did a toast to "Catmo", his nickname he had acquired because he refered to everyone as Cat.
For 6 days in that campground, when we were in camp, first one, two , three, four..on and on would wander up and ask who Catmo was. Most everyone would hear what I had to say and smile. Most would up a toast to "Catmo" We would always end up laughing over some of the funny stories I told over some of Dad`s pranks, stunts and sayings, then others that had lost a Dad or loved one would have a funny story.
Bud, that`s where I figued it all out. Catmo had gone nowhere. He had done so many great things for folks and made so many laugh that a part of him would always be there.
Now the thoughts and stories of Dad are not sad ones, but instead memories of the good times and the laughter.
Guess this is quite a rambling story here and I don`t know if you will understand where I`m coming from or not.
Bud, what I`m trying to say is just hang in there through the first foglike days and the confusion. Find a way to get away from those who are hanging pretty close trying to help, but or really not.
Go somewhere you and your Dad shared good times together. Sit down and go through your lifetime together. Once you start, the rest will come. Work through the grief and the loss, then remember all of the good times and the things he left you with that noone can ever take away.
I think you , like myself were a couple of the lucky ones. Our Dad`s were a big part of our life. Many out there never got to experience a Dad being a part of their life, not to mention best friend.
I`m here if you find a need for a sounding board. Just give me a shout.
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My heartfelt condolences Mac. Lost my dad last February but his memory is still with me.
I hope you will find comfort in the future in remembering the time you had together. You can look at bad things happenning around you and think "I was a part of that man's life - that's a joy no-one can take away". That relationship was a gift to you that was unique and personal to you, and even though he is gone, the gift remains.
It's tough now but hang in there.
Sparks
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Sorry to hear it Mac.
your Dad.
You've had a rough time of it lately.
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Dont remember where I got this, but several of us wrote this out on small pieces of paper and dropped them into the grave when my grandpa passed away. He was pretty much a father to me, to all of us, and his funeral is the only day in nearly 40 years I've ever seen my old man cry.
You may have thought I didn't see,
Or that I hadn't heard,
Life's lessons that you taught to me,
But I got every word.
Perhaps you thought I missed it all,
And that we'd grow apart;
But sir, I picked up everything,
It's written on my heart.
Without you, well, I wouldn't be
The man I am today;
You built a strong foundation
No one can take away.
I've grown up with your values,
And I'm very glad I did;
So here's to you, dear father,
From your forever grateful kid.
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AWMac sorry for your loss. Had the same thing happen a couple of years ago. It's about a 2 year plus process to be able to deal with it. Don't keep from crying if you feel like it....
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IceMaw, Redtop, Toad and Sparks. <<
>> Thanks Bro's
Jackl1 I think our blood runs the same. My Mom was against me ever owning a MotorFrikkenMutherBike , Don't know why cuz her Dad, my Grandfather came home from WWII and bought a Harley..
Well my Dad slipped me the bucks to get what I wanted. "Whispered in my ear, if you ever tell yer Mother....." Point taken.
I bought a 1969 Biitchin Black, 12 " over stock forks with a 2" stretch in the neck, spoked and the old air intake front wheel hub, dam Amal carbs, Prince of Darkeness, Triump 650. Plus a 125cc Yamaha dirt bike for kickin in the mud. Best of times.. Mom still doesn't know to this day that I had them, yet I taught my Brother how to ride them both.
Gonna teach my 8 year old Son, Jake how to ride. Just the other day my Son had probs with his bike and I broke out the tool box. Busted it down and he was wide eyed. Asked me how I knew about bikes and things. Told him Pop Pop taught me and now I need to teach you. Now I have the song from the Lion King in my head "Circle of Life" playing... funny how Life works out.
Helped rebuild a '53 Panhead in Korea for a Korean named Kim, tattooist... It was a basket case police edition of a '53 panhead, if you have some old EZ Riders check out "In the Wind" pics of 'late Nov or Dec '79. We had GI's buying diff parts outta the Jammer handbook to get this basketcase up in 3 Months. In turn Kimmy paid for an entire club just before Christmas and beer, booze and babes all free. Good times.
But back to my Dad. Just got off the phone with my Mom and she's giving me the number to the Funeral Home tomorrow morning of the guy yhat is doing my Dads creamation. I'll hook up with him and make arrangements to escort my Dad to Arlington Natl Cem. I'll show all the Honor I have for my Dad and show the Pride I had in him. Then it's meltdown time at home.
Thanks Jackl1 <<>>
mac
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Rogwar <<
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Star Bud that was great... I'll carry a hand written copy with me to Arlington with me. I want to give my Father my Jump Wings also.
mac
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Sorry AWMac,
I lost my dad 20 years ago March 15. I was 16.
There is nothing harder and my best wishes are with you and your family.
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Originally posted by AWMac
Jackl1 I think our blood runs the same. My Mom was against me ever owning a MotorFrikkenMutherBike , Don't know why cuz her Dad, my Grandfather came home from WWII and bought a Harley.
Hehe! Yep, we may be brothers of another mother. Mom was dead set, absolutely not and that`s final, against me sitting on anything with two wheels.
So......Dad bought one too. :) Got my start and the fever pretty early from my Dad`s cousin and his sidekick dozer operator. Dad`s cousin had a welding shop a couple of miles down the road from my Granddad`s. In this shop, these two had three Harleys, one of which was an old 45 trike, 2 Indians and a BSA they had picked up somewhere. Me and Popaw were usaly down there every day so Pop`s could catch up on all the BS. I knew where the shop towel and shining cloth cabinet was. I put out a lot of elbow grease on these objects of worship starting about age 5 or 6. I logged more miles in a couple of years than most lifetime riders on those bikes.........all with the kickstand down. :)
Gonna teach my 8 year old Son, Jake how to ride. Just the other day my Son had probs with his bike and I broke out the tool box. Busted it down and he was wide eyed. Asked me how I knew about bikes and things. Told him Pop Pop taught me and now I need to teach you.
There ya go. :)
if you have some old EZ Riders check out "In the Wind" pics of 'late Nov or Dec '79.
I have a bunch of totes full of EZ riders, I`ll have to dig through.
I'll hook up with him and make arrangements to escort my Dad to Arlington Natl Cem. I'll show all the Honor I have for my Dad and show the Pride I had in him.
Give an extra salute his way from em bud.
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Sorry for your loss Mac.
To your father.
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Thanks Shifty <<
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mac
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Well written eulogy. Sorry about your loss.
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TY MT <<
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Dear Fred,
I was about to go off to bed when I saw the title of this post, and I thought to myself, please Lord not another death in his family so soon...
But alas, the Potter is wiser than I, and while I do not know how things will work out for you, I know that he means even this difficult trial for your ultimate good, for when He says "All things" in "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" he means both the good and the bad.
Brother, I know that the burden of this loss will be hard to bear, in fact I know that it will be impossible to bear if you try to bear it alone, therefore all I can urge you to do is to seek help from the Savior whose yoke is always easy and whose burden always light. He will help you to carry it, if you will but ask Him.
More times than I would have wished, I have shared the following passages with those who have lost relatives in the Lord. Both are from the letters of Samuel Rutherford, who like his Savior was a man well acquainted with grief. They were written to members of his congregation who had lost loved ones, the first a son, the second all her children and then her husband. I hope the eternal truths he expresses will be equally applicable to you, my friend.
Your Lord may gather His roses, and shake His apples, at what season of the year He pleases. Each husbandman cannot make harvest when he pleases, as He can do. You are taught to know and adore His sovereignty, which He exercises over you, which yet is lustred with mercy. The child has but changed a bed in the garden, and is planted up higher, nearer the sun, where he shall thrive better than in this ground. You must think your Lord would not want him one hour longer; and since the date of your loan of him was expired (as it is, if you read the lease), let Him have His own with gain, as good reason were. I read on it an exaltation and a richer measure of grace, as the sweet fruit of your cross; and I am bold to say, that... where your Master has set you now shall find it.
Dearest brother, go on and faint not. Something of yours is in heaven, beside the flesh of your exalted Savior; and you go on after your own. Time’s thread is shorter by one inch than it was. An oath is sworn and past the seals, whether afflictions will or not, you must grow and live and triumph and reign and be more than a conqueror. For your Captain who leads you on, is more than conqueror, and He makes you partaker of His conquest and victory. Did not love to you compel me, I would not fetch water to the well, and speak to one who knoweth better than I can do what God is doing with him.
"And I dare say that God’s hammering of you from your youth is only to make you a fair carved stone in the high upper temple of the New Jerusalem. Your Lord never thought this world’s vain painted glory a gift worthy of you; and therefore would not bestow it on you, because He is to gift you with a better portion. Let the temporary go; the inheritance is yours. You are a child of the house, and joy is laid up for you, it is long in coming, but not the worse for that. I am now expecting to see, and that with joy and comfort, that which I hoped of you since I knew you fully; even that you have laid such strength upon the Holy One of Israel, that you defy troubles, and that your soul is a castle that may be besieged, but cannot be taken. And withal consider how in all these trials (and truly they have been many) your Lord has been loosing you at the root from perishing things, and hunting after you to grip your soul... for the Son of God’s sake, let Him not miss His grip, but stay and abide in the love of God, as Jude saith (Jude 21)."
Fred, let me leave you with the Lord's blessing to you and your family, I pray these things will be yours through His grace:
"The LORD bless you and keep you;
The LORD make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you;
The LORD lift up His countenance upon you, And give you peace." '
Your Friend and Brother,
Andy Webb
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This you'll all love.
My Son likes to fish, just like me.. we sit and talk and for some reason he gets all the bites.... but that isn't the story.
I finally bought him his own fishing pole, tackle box, lures and such. Pointing out to him what each lure did and what kinda fish you can catch with them.. he was fasinated that I, Super Dad, knew these things. I need a cape and a Wizard Hat LOL.
And as a passage of rites the Day we was to go fishing I woke him up at 5am...it's a Dad/Son thing. We loaded up the Jeep, him still excited but wiping the sleep out of his eyes we set off to a good pond. Stopped on the way for the essentials, sodas, beef jerky and tater chips.
Got to the spot, got things rigged up and taught him about baitin the hook, the bobber and casting...I thought I taught well. His 1st cast was short, 2nd one made a bird nest in his reel, more training and he was gonna do fine.
I'm sittin on the bank and "Bang" the bobber hits my head and the minnow with hook becomes one with my neck...on top of that OFF bug spray..stung like hell!! So I work the hook out, explain to him to be a lil more careful in casting...nuff said.... 4 casts later "Bang" behind my right arm near the arm pit deep.... I mumble a few words and he asks "Dad are you Mad?"
"No Son I'm just working the hook out."
Then it dawned on me... I did the same to my Dad when I was young. Hooked my Dad a few times and he mumbled words I never knew...
Well after a few times of him out fishin me and me worrying about blood loss and infection, minnows and worms stuff, we packed up and headed home.
It was a Great Day.
Kinda following in my Fathers footsteps... not a bad place to be...
mac
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Andy,
My Brother, if it isn't an inconvience can I call you tomorrow. I was hoping you'd pop into this thread.
I've lost my Brother, My Niece and now my Father...is there more I have to lose? I got laid off in June and have been busting my backside seeking work.
I have a full plate and then some. I can't and will not question GOD... but in the back of my mind I ask myself "Why me?, What have I done in my life so wicked to suffer this pain?" I have treated everyone fairly.
In 3 1/2 Years my World has been turned over to nothing but pain and I have no clue why. I have harmed no one and yet my Heart is being ripped out time after time. I know GOD does not give you more than you can handle, but good Lord I need a break.
I got laid off in June, been busting my nards to get working again... losing pride when I have to call in weekly to file for unemployment... that's just not me... I have to work to live.
I prayed today with the Pastor from our Church, 1st Methodist. I cried myself to sleep last night. A cry that was so deep and from the Soul, sounds from me I've never heard before. Have I've done wrong in my life? If so, is there something I can do to correct it?..I just can't find the answers and yet I live in pain.
Andy, I don't know when this pain will all end. Who do I lose next? My Mom has had Breast Cancer followed by a mastectomy, two bad hip replacements and uses a walker to get around. She's slowly losing her mind. I just don't know anymore. I'm rolling with the punches.
What really gets me Andy is I'm a Believer, I pray, go to Church..am I singled out for a reason? Or is this all just coincidental? Bad timing?
When my Dad was down here visiting he fell in love with the area, wanted to move. My Mom said NO cuz all her friends were in Toledo. Dad told me she has no friends cuz they had all passed away years ago...now that my Dad is passed on my Mom wants to move down here. I fell that if my Dad had moved down here years ago he may still be alive. She didn't tell me he was in a Nursing home until 2 weeks after the fact.. the third week he died. Alone. No one was there to be with him.
That's what I'm dealing with and I can tell you more Andy. I'll call you tomorow after 10am your time, if that is okay with you.
mac
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Sorry to hear Mac. My dad has heart issues and I dread what you are experiencing.
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Filth
I hope and pray all goes well for you and your Father. I would never wish this pain upon anyone.
Be with your Dad as much as possible. Tell him you love him as much as you can. Talk and relive the good times.
That will help you.
mac
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Originally posted by AWMac
Masherbrum, the talk helped me alot Bro. Thanks. <<>>
mac
This GAME is secondary. Our talk is what it is about for me. I'll chat soon. Don't you even worry about that.
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Thanks Mash, it did me well just to talk it off a bit today... Thanks for the ear. <<
>> Bro
mac
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Fred
Sorry to hear about your loss, at times like this it makes us realise how short life is but our memories can hold onto that loved one and in our dreams we are together forever.
I know your a strong person but don't hold back your feelings I did and it extended a bad period for me so please learn from my mistake.
I wish there was more I could say that could make things easier but only time can heal these wounds just know that you have my friendship and you can call on me anytime.
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Hi Fred,
Originally posted by AWMac
Andy,
My Brother, if it isn't an inconvience can I call you tomorrow. I was hoping you'd pop into this thread.
Yes of course you can call me, I'll be at the church office most of today. I would have gotten here sooner, but I wanted to clean out some of the debris "Ernesto" left in our yard this morning. Give me a call anytime today at 910-630-1215.
Also, if you can drop me an email or a PM with your home address. There are a couple of books that I think will help that I want to send you today.
Your Servant in Christ,
Pastor Webb
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awmac, check your pm.
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COBA94, Jackl1 and Seagoon check yer PM's.
mac
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xbrit <<
>> Thanks Bro.
check yer PM Bud.
mac
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Just got off the phone with the Funeral Home that is creamating my Dad... same Funeral Home that did my Brother.
Wasn't an easy call to make but me made me feel a lil more comfortable. He has my number, Home and Cell, and will call me to let me know all that is happening. Also when my Dads ashes will be ready to ship out to Arlington Natl Cem.
Man this was a tough call...just drained the power out of me, feel so numb. Still living in a fog.
mac
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sorry to hear about your loss Mac
.... he is in a far better place now having a good ole time.
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101ABN <<
>> yeah no more pain.
mac
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My heartfelt condolences to you and yours :(
My Dad passed away a few years ago ..was fairly sudden, I could not get back across country to see him off, tween jobs, fairly well broke, everything was going wrong it seemed.
You *will* come thru it.
'Have a little faith, baby!' - Oddball, Sherman tank driver, Kelly's Hero's
..in yourself ..those you care for .. and in the Lord.
-GE
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Sorry to hear it.
Condolences
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gd Mac my favorite summer job was delivering Libbey glass to the bars of Phoenix(mesa,tempe,scottsdale) when I was 18
S! yer bud-Dad
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On top of all of this, my Dads Passing, to get my mind on other things. I good outside with my 8 year old Son to toss the soft football in the Cul-de-Sac. No traffic, nicely cut lawns trimed to the curb.
We play a game called "Go Long" a game we used to play inside until we hit the chandelar and caused some damage. Mom stepped in as the Referee and now "Go Long CANNOT be played inside the house...EVER!!!"
Well we're playing "Go Long" and having fun... he can't catch well but has a great arm throwing. Mine you he's 8, I'm 48...this will be a factor again as we go along....
Nice pass, I run after it, great lead on me and I almost have it...I stumbled a bit, twisted left ankle which caused me to lose all traction , balance and the word "Momentum" takes over. Like a Heavy Stuka with no gear I'm making a landing...eyes off the football and look towards point of inpact. The curb.
You know you are really gonna be hurt when everything happens in slow motion...at full flying speed, no flaps extended I hit the curb with my chest right under the man teets, no bounce dead stop. Knock the BeJebus outta me... couldn't breath! Elbow bleeding like Hell, right hip wants to go on strike, left Big toe broke and the one next to it stubed, right kidney seems bruised, gasping for air.
Son comes runnng up and asks are you okay? I reply with lil air I have yes and can we play later? He said Yeah I think you need a break. I think the term in Aces High is "You have ditched" LOL
I'm walking like Ozzy Osbourne right now, had my wifey help me climb/crawl up the stairs to my puter room. Other than that I had an okay Day.
How was your's?
mac
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Mac,
Sorry to see you lost your Dad. You had a great life together with him and have so many memories to keep you going. I envy you immensely for that gift you had.
You already know that you can never pay back the debt you owe your parents, you always pay it forward in raising your own kids. You have a great start on that debt, now build the same kind of memories for your kids that your Dad blessed you with.
The next few days will be your own personal trial to endure. Remember the good times, cherish the bond you have with your Dad and wish him well on his last voyage. You have something you cannot place a value on and that is the great memories the 2 of you built. After all we have in this world, only the memories and love are the things we can take forward through this life and beyond. Everything else falls away from us.
and RIP to your Dad.
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Thanks Mav <<
>> well said. I'm even dreaming at night about him and wake up talking to him.
mac
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My Dads Obituary (http://www.legacy.com/ToledoBlade/Obituaries.asp?Page=Lifestory&PersonId=19077125)
(http://www.legacy.com/Images/Cobrands/ToledoBlade/Photos/00061276_1_09032006_1.jpg)
Missing you Pop!
<<>>
Love Always,
Fred Jr.
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Thanks for the call COBA94 <<
>>
mac
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Had to call the Funeral home...seems like my Mom dropped everything in my lap, called Arlington Natl Cem with wuestions, called back to the Funeral Home...Dad's been cremated already.
Called the Airlines about Breaverty Fares , them bastages...even in pain they want to drain you dry.
Andy I got the books today, been reading it off and on, Thanks my Brother.
This isn't the first time it's been thrown in my face..my Grandmother died in '82. I had to fly back from Korea and handle it all.
It all gets old. Just hanging on. Wonder who will handle me when it's my turn to pass on... but Hell I'll be 115 years old and so many perks you'll will fear me. The only Urn at a AH CON LOL
Life goes on... the circle of Life I guess.
Andy thanks Brother. To the rest of you all <<>> Thanks for being there.
mac
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Had to call the Funeral home...seems like my Mom dropped everything in my lap, called Arlington Natl Cem with questions, called back to the Funeral Home...Dad's been cremated already.
Called Airlines, them bastages...even in pain they want to drain you dry.
Andy I got the books today, been read off and on, Thanks my Brother.
This isn't the first time it's been thrown in my face..my Grandmother died in '82. I had to fly back from Korea and handle it all.
It all gets old. Just hanging on. Wonder who will handle me when it's my turn to pas on... but Hell I'll be 115 years old and so many perks you'll will fear me. The only Urn at a AH CON LOL
Life goes on... the circle of Life I guess.
Andy thanks Brother. To the rest of you all <<>> Thanks for being there.
mac
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It just gets tougher everyday. Between the Funeral Home, Arlington, my own Mother and my Family.
I'm wearing the fake face as though I'm strong and nothing is bothering me but inside I havent stopped grieving. I can't sleep at night, can't eat,
on the phone constantly...fly a lil to just get my mind off things.
The saddest thing is My Wife and I will be the only ones at the Ceremony at Arlington. That hurts. As many friends as he had too. The first thing out of my Moms mouth today was "Take alotta pictures"
I'm just at a Loss, I'm pulled in a dozen directions and trying to do my best for my Dad. I pray and cry at night asking for strength and direction...still waiting for answers. I feel so Lost, but to others I look like I have my watermelon together.
I'm just making it on a thread. I'm loosing it slowly.
mac
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they say "one day at a time" ...
but sometimes it is "one hour at a time"
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Thanks Eagler....sometimes it gets down to "One minute at at time".
mac
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Mac,
Trying times are tough for a reason. They wouldn't be trying if there were no real effort involved. You are doing what your Dad wanted. It usually falls on the kids to take care of the parent’s last wishes. Face it, who else would really be expected to do it. They raised you, took care of you and they count on you to finish the job with them.
Is your Mom not going because of money or because she can't stand going through another reminder that her life partner is gone? If it's her choice, remember she knew your Dad before you did and lived with him more than the kids. He was at least half of her life in a deeper way than even for you.
I won't say enjoy Arlington because you won't be able to like you would if you were on vacation. Just remember that you are doing for your Dad what he cannot do for himself. It's a sacred responsibility if you will to care for him and do this task. Who else could he and your Mom ask but you? Who else would have the care, concern and love for him, not to mention the strength, to do this thing for him but you?
This is not a burden even though it feels like one, it's you taking him home to his resting-place, a place of honor and distinction. Only the best get the chance to be there to rest in honored repose. Lay him down with love, respect, regret and know that this is what he wanted and needed YOU to do for him. He could count on no other to have the respect and responsibility to do this. This is a Soldiers resting-place and deserves a Soldiers labor and care to make it happen.
Get it done, remember him, love him and do what he would want you to do and keep on living. His passing is not the end of your life. Don't make it so against what your Dad would want.
Thinking about you and praying for ya.
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Mav,
Thank you. That was right on target. I'm not sure yet when I'll be going but will keep you all informed and also how it all went.
Thanks Mav,
mac
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Seagoon,
Andy my Brother you don't know how much that call meant to me. I really needed it today. It made so much sense to me. You really made my Day.
After we talked and prayed I felt so much more better and see things now in a different prospective.
It was strange that I had just thought about you and the phone rang and it was you. Talk about the hairs raising on the back of the neck. Your words were perfect and the timing couldn't have been any better.
Someday we'll meet. Again, Thank you.
GOD Bless and Take Care Andy,
Fred
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Sorry, Mac I missed this thread , I'll just add some words*
Veuillez recevoir mes condoléances sincères et croire en mes respectueux sentiments.
*I choose to write in french as when I write the same in english I find it doesn't sound as sincere as in french (add this to the long list of my dysfunctions)
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Mac,
Just saw this thread.... so very sorry to hear it. My prayers and thoughts go with you.
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Originally posted by straffo
Sorry, Mac I missed this thread , I'll just add some words*
Veuillez recevoir mes condoléances sincères et croire en mes respectueux sentiments.
*I choose to write in french as when I write the same in english I find it doesn't sound as sincere as in french (add this to the long list of my dysfunctions)
I think this is as close as I can make.
In front of this painful blow dealt by fate, I at the same time sad and am décontenancé. I would like to bring a little comfort to you, but, today, I miss the words. Receive all my tenderness.
Thanks Straffo, Very kind words.
mac
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Originally posted by Bodhi
Mac,
Just saw this thread.... so very sorry to hear it. My prayers and thoughts go with you.
Thank you Bodhi, Prayers help in times as this.
mac
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Originally posted by AWMac
I think this is as close as I can make.
In front of this painful blow dealt by fate, I at the same time sad and am décontenancé. I would like to bring a little comfort to you, but, today, I miss the words. Receive all my tenderness.
Thanks Straffo, Very kind words.
mac
I've a lot of empathy because I'm trying to prepare myself for the same unfortunate event.
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It's this week or next to Arlington.
Just got to get myself together now.
Dad is cremated now and ready for the final trip.
mac
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Well making some kind of progress.
Arlington Natl Cem is booked all Month of Sept for burials. I don't blame them at all, soldiers from Iraq and Afganistland.... Let the young go first, my Dad woould understand.
So I have an arrangememnt for my Fathers inturnment on October 3rd at 0900. That was his coffee time unless we were fishin, by then he was fishin a hook outta his neck when we were fishin by then.
Had to make all the arrangenments today, flight, hotel, rental car, call the funeral home to have them confirm with the airlines it was a breavement fare.
Never deal with Best Western...even in breavement they are rude.
I'm trying to keep this as low cost as I can because I'm laid off and the wifey has the $$$... Flying into Baltimore because Reagan Natl cost too much. Will drive from Baltimore to Arlington and back.
Budget Rental car will give me a funeral relief discount..but have to call tomorrow.
But enough of me...
PropMAW lost his Son in a motorcycle accident a few days ago... I can't imagine having to do all of this for a Son when I'm just doing this for my Dad.
My heart goes out to Doug and his Family, my Prayers are with you. I promised Doug a favor and take a few pics of where his Father is inturned at Arlington while I'm there.
Thanks to all of you that responded, it was truely appreciated.
mac
Please add PropMAW and Family to your prayers as well.
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Trying to find the most easiest way to put this.......
I called and made the Airline flights, round trip, Breavement fare on the phone with Continiential... had to pay half with checkbook, rest with credit card. Was assured it would not be a prob. Confirmation code in hand I go to the Airport to pay and make the reservations....
I get to the counter and give the Confirmation number and explain that I need to pay half in Check and the rest on Credit Card...
Well behind the counter was a man my age and a woman a bit younger, somewhat in training. I explained all of this and immedialely the man loks down on me and rolls his eyes a few times, tells the woman this will take hours, looks at me again and acts pissed.
My cool factor just went right out the window... I had enough of this chit.
In a extremely loud voice I said " HEY THIS IS A BREAVEMENT FARE WE ARE DOING, I AM ON MY WAY TO "INTURN" MY FATHER AT ARLINGTON... ARE WE HAVING A PROBLEM WITH THIS AND HONORING A VET?"
With all of the attn on him he let the woman handle it all...
I just wanted to reach across and grab his dumb asss by the tie and bring him back into Reality.... I was pissed. The Woman appologized for him... I'll call Continential later and file a complaint... now isnt the time.
People can be so cruel...this bellybutton probably has never served in the Military but being a "Airline Counter Man" means it all...
Sorry all I'm just ranting... not sleeping well, not eating well...just having a hard time. Those that have buried their Fathers now what I'm going through.
I wish you enough,
mac
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Trying to find out if there is someone at Arlington Natl Cem that video records the Inturnment of the decesed for the Family.
I would find it distasteful and disrespectful to have a Family member of the deceased to have to record or take pics of the Inturnment.
Has anyone been throught this before or as a direction to point me in?
If so please let me know. My Dads inturnment is Oct 3rd at 0900.
mac
Please PM me if you know where to point me.... I'm still in a fog.
thanks,
mac
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Mac,
I cannnot know the pain you are going through.
I haven't been around here in awhile and just recently came back but we fly with/against each other several years ago. Know that you are in my thoughts and I hope things get better as time goes by for you. I feel honored that you feel you have enough "family" here that you can share your pain during this time. If I can help take some of that pain from you heart and off your shoulders please let me do so. Even though we have not met in person or chatted in several years you are my brother and I will pray for you.
Salute!
Brandon
Rocket
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salute mac, stay strong brother.
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Brandon,
Thanks Bud for the words of encouragement and thoughtfulness. It's just hard to get through all of this at the most worse time possible. Doing the best I can and sometimes it seems short. But it's prayers and hope that will get me through this... Thanks Bro.
If it isn't one thing it's another. My focus is on my Dad. To give him the best his Son can do for him during this time. In the meantime, it's everything imaginable from every given direction. Laid off, job searching, bills piling up, phone calls from the mortgage company, airline counter pukes with attitudes and then a certified letter from the IRS... they want back taxes for last year or threaten to sieze my property. Time to place a Kidney, testicle, fingers or toes on eBay.
Throwing my hands up and letting GOD run the show cuz I can't anymore. I could lay down and sleep for weeks right now. Haven't slept in days on end, then I crash for a few hours.... rinse and repeat. I'll go 3 days without eating then stuff....rinse and repeat.
Running on Prayers and Friends right now. Thanks for the Prayers my Friend. Thanks to all of you!
mac
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AW, check your PM's
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Sorry to here about your Dad AWMac, hang in there.
I salute you and your father for faithfully serving this great nation. May your Dad rest in peace.
Scat
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AW, I don't pop in here much anymore, so that's why I just now read this. Your dad sounds like quite a neat guy to grow up with. He lives through you, now. If you look close, you can see him in the little things you do: maybe a certain habit, or look, or tone of voice, or saying...could be a thousand little things. And I'm sure you'll pass on those things to your kid, along with oyur own unique characteristics.
Sorry to hear about your loss, but I'm sure you have some really good memories to look back on. Continue making some memories with Jake.
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Originally posted by Hawco
AW, check your PM's
Hawco check your PMs.
mac
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Slimm50,
Thanks Bud.....
Never question an Eagle Scout!
<<>>
mac
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Scat,
Thanks Bro
mac
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Trying B@tfinkV, Lord knows I'm trying!!!!
mac
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Hate to keep bumping this thread, No one likes Death, Loss of a loved one or even grieving. Especially when they are untimed...as if there is a timing for such things.
But just want to keep those that supported me with kind words and prayers up to date.
My Father, Best Friend will be inturned at Arlington National Cemetery on October 3rd, 2006 at 0900 Hrs.
My Family, Wife, Youngest Daughter and Son will attend the inturnment. I have gone through as many preparations as an oldest Son can do. No help whatsoever from my Mother or Sister. Everything was dumped in my lap.
Flight, Hotel, Rental Car. Coordinated with the Funeral Home in Toledo, OH and with the Funeral Director at Arlington. Coordinated with the Naval Chaplain that will conduct the gravesite services. Recieved the ETickets for the flight, Confimation numbers for Hotel and Car. Last, but not least, contacted a recommended videographer to record the ceremony.
Don't know how I'm going to make it....so stressed.
mac
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Mac,
Hang in there. I don't think anyone will mind at all that you are coming here and keeping people up to date on everything. If spreading some of your grief out by talking here with your other family helps you get through this time then that is great. By taking a little of your shoulders and passing it along to us helps you heal and helps you manage the unmanagable.
It is hard to be a pillar to your family during this time when all you really want to be able to do is grieve, but the great man that you are taking care of now has done a great job in preparing you for this. He has helped shape you through the years and your family has the confidence that even when times are the toughest that you are the cornerstone that will weather the storm and not give out during the toughest of times. Wind and rain may weather the edges but that strong core that has been built will withstand.
Mac, please keep coming back and sharing with us and we will take the little pieces we can and help provide support and shoring for your cornerstone. You are a fine man and I am sure that your son will turn out the same way.
S!
Brandon
Rocket
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Well it's Sunday, day before the flight.
Been doing shots of Vodka talking with Dad. We used to do that before. It loosing up the heart and the lips. Heart to Heart.
I think I have everything covered...but you know how that is. Something is always missing.
Jake and I will be in Black suits, white shirts, black ties. Wifey and Renae will be in white skirts and black tops.
Tonight we will get all the crying out so we don't cry at the Funeral..make it respectable...Wredes never cry at Funerals. Weddings and Births are different.
I thought it was tough when my Brother died, and then later when his Daughter, Tessa got ran over by a car, but to lose your Father is the top of the Mountain. 3 Deaths in less than 3 years..just a bit too much.
I Thank you all that sent Prayers and Condolences...without you guys It would be more difficult to deal with.
Andy (Seagoon) Brother I thank you with all my heart.
PropMAW you and Family are still in our Prayers. Strenght and Comfort.
The next few days are going to be the hardest to deal with.
Again I want to Thank you all that have been supportive.
mac
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Back from Arlington Natl Cem. It was a long two days. But I finally got my Father (Pop) where he could Rest in Peace
The Naval Chaplain was Great. The "Old Guard" very Professional.
The Ceremony was great. They say timing is everything but there were somethings that was beyond just simple timing. The Cemetery in within the flight path of Reagan Intl Airport. We we seated, the Chaplain spoke and we stood in prayer. Before the prayer, 23rd Psalm was over a jetliner flew over, couldn't see it but the sound was there, as if it was a fly over... just coincidental I know.
Then the 3 volleys of rounds fired from 7 "Old Guard" Sailors, 21 gun Salute. TAPS was completed and far off in the distance a Church sounded it's Bells... it couldn't have been timed any better.
Then the remains bearers, that have been holding the flag over my Fathers urn, folded the flag. Precision and very Professional, the flag turned over to the Chaplain, a slow salute and then the flag was presented to me with words from the Chaplain. The Lady Representative of Arlington then presented her condolences and cards from the Ladies Auxliary.
Once the Old Guard had marched off I carried my Father for the last time to his final burial site. Never new an urn could feel so heavy, I worried about tripping and dropping my Dad. Made it with no Problems. Placed him at the spot, Washington Monument in the far background.
Then it was Family time to say things to my Dad over the urn...I went down on one knee and my hand over his urn, head down I said my words...did all my crying days ago so I was trying to be the strong one. My wifes turn and she is sobbing hard... got my nose running. Next my Youngest Daughter turn, Pop Pops favorite Granddaughter and she was sobbing.... next my Son, Pop Pops first Grandson..he went down on one knee and cried. Had me now reaching for my nose wiper.
All was good. Later I went to the Columbaruim and found when my Uncle John, Dads younger Brother, was inturned took pictures. Then found where PropMAWs Dad was inturned, took pics and will send to him. Funny thing is PropMAWs Dad is right around the bend from my Uncle. Small World.
Got with a few today, Lambo, Major, MVJester a few more and me. tried a fly by for my Dad in the Late War Arena but too may N00bs don't have an Idea what a Flyover is... so we went to Mid War Arena and did one. Lambo commanded the Naval fiters, Major was did a perfect missing Pilot and I dropped troops on a Port. All together as if it had been practiced for Months... Thanks guys. <<>>
I know my Dad had to have seen this... it was perfect.
Thanks guys and Thanks to all that seen me thru this crisis... Seagoon thanks Andy. Thanks to all those in this thread that offered condolences and words of strength, encourgment and Prayers.
God Bless,
Mac
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Can't wait to meet you guys at the next CON.
Until then <<>> Blue Skies and Tail Winds.
Mac
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Mac,
One chapter closes, another opens. Job well done.
Drive on. Time to get busy now.
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Rgr that Mav <<
>>
Mac
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Mac, he sounded like a great man, and I truly appreciate you allowing me to lead the missing man formation we flew in his memory. Hope we looked good enough to impress your dad who I'm sure was watching from heaven. <<
>> NAVY
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I hate to hear that; maybe there is a better place that we go on to & he went there.
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Hi Mac,
Thanks for letting us know how things went, I'm glad it went well. As I mentioned, my Father-in-law's John "Jack" Moore's remains are also in the Columbarium (Army Air Corps, Bombardier B-17s/B-29s WW2 era). I did the graveside service for him there, and I will freely admit that despite having done military funerals elsewhere that was undoubtedly the most moving as well as the most flawlessly executed.
Anyway brother, you were blessed to have had a father whose life was worthy of being honored, the best way you can do that now is by striving by grace to be a good and godly father and husband, the kind that every decent father hopes his son will be. You cannot do that in your own strength, no man can, but as God assured Paul - "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness."
Give me a call in a little while so that I can know how you're doing and how I can continue to pray for and with you.
Your Servant and Friend,
Andy aka Seagoon
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Originally posted by lambo522
Mac, he sounded like a great man, and I truly appreciate you allowing me to lead the missing man formation we flew in his memory. Hope we looked good enough to impress your dad who I'm sure was watching from heaven. <<>> NAVY
Lambo it was perfect as if you guys practiced for weeks... timing was great also. <<>>
All that did the fly over, the first round is on me at the next CON. if you can't make it I'll FedEx a beer or a few... or yer drink of choice.
Andy, there is so much to say to you I don't know where to begin... Please email me your address... either home or the Church. I'd like to thank you.
To all, <<>> Thank you! It's been a tuff 3 years.
God Bless,
Mac