Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: Big Mickey on December 18, 2006, 07:00:42 PM

Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Big Mickey on December 18, 2006, 07:00:42 PM
So last night I am out to have little spin in the MW arena. A quick look at the map show minimal dar bar so this may have been a mistake. I really am looking for a good fight after playing with the hordes in the LW arena. But I decide "what the hell, I'll find some fun somewhere!" I jump into the trusty D11 and head off towards enemy territory. I am bound to find something.

I grab to 15K as the clock spins past. Boredom is beginning to set in. "Why did I do this" I ask myself. "Why did I decide to hit the MW and fly around like some lost cargo pilot?"

I'm about to say the heck with it and bail, when  dar bar pops in the sector to the north!! "Finally" I say out loud in a voice full of excitement... I pretend not to notice the wife who I catch in my peripheral vision as she looks over the top of her book shaking her head, I could try to explain it to her but she'd never understand....best just to avoid eye contact.

I put the throttle to the firewall and break to the north. Whoever this is I am going to ruin their day!!!

DOTS!!! DOTS!!! I tell you...and they'er LOW!!!!

This is it, the reason I came into the MW. A chance to get a kill and land the darned thing. I keep my alt and move closer to this unsuspecting prey. The dot's slowly transform...one formation of Lancs.....now two formations of Lancs!!! And they are spread out. No overlapping fields of fire, no mutual support for each other. This is going to be sweet!!!!

My fingers begin to ache as I grasp the controls tighter and tighter. I am saving my alt so that I can drop out of the sun with eight 50's blazing!! This Toolsheder and his sidekick will never know what hit them.

I get over the top and roll in. My face almost pressed against the monitor as I don't want to miss this opportunity! Closer and closer to my unsuspecting prey.

I decide to make my dive steeper so that I can pull out behind them and blast away at their 6. I'll be moving so fast even if they get a shot off they'll surely miss.

Closer and closer, the lancs beginning to fill my windscreen...

Again out of the corner of my eye I see the wife. She is somehow fascinated with the strange contortions of my face......"Ignore her!!!"....."Concentrate on the task at hand!!!"

Almost there time to pull out and and open fire!!! I gently pull back on the stick as my Jug is shuttering like Leonardo Decaprio in the scene from Titanic when he is in the water and the good looking red headed gal is floating on some door or something....

Nothing happens!!!! I pull more!!! Still nothing!!!!

Panic set in and I frantically grab for the keyboard to kill the combat trim and trim full up elevator!!! Fingers frantically searching for the right keys!!

By now that crazy wife of mine has laid her book down and is rolling with laughter!!!

"That psycho B%^&H"....."Why did I marry her anyway!!!"...."I am about to die and all she can do is LAUGH!!!!"

I finally lawn dart after passing to the right of the lead formation. Although I didn't film it, I can swear I heard laughter from the Lancs as I passed by.

I am such a flippin DWEEB!!!!

Big Mickey
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Major Biggles on December 18, 2006, 07:04:22 PM
LOL!

nice AAR mickey
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Bronk on December 18, 2006, 07:09:10 PM
LMAO

Thanks for the laugh.




Bronk
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Wax on December 18, 2006, 07:30:40 PM
:rofl  thx  good 1
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: betty on December 18, 2006, 07:44:44 PM
ohhhhhhhhhhh thats wayyyyyyyyyy funny mickey....better luck next time.

btw, that stuff happens to me all the time, thats y i fly my tiff, it doesn't mind compression. just gotta chop throttle and pull easy on the joystick or u will rip ur wings off, which has happened many many times ...so trial and error my friend :)
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: E25280 on December 18, 2006, 08:10:18 PM
:lol :rofl :lol
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Big Mickey on December 18, 2006, 08:25:22 PM
Well Betty, you see the problem is I have already been through this trial and made this error before!

I really think it's a male thing. You see our brain from time gets so overfilled with testosterone that there is no room for common sense!

I think the best female analogy I can come up with would be when a woman is say, watching TV with her boyfriend or husband, and the Victoria's Secret commercial comes on.  I think the woman's brain gets that estrogen overload and you ask "Do you think she is prettier than me?" :D

Big Mickey
Title: Just when
Post by: RAPIER on December 18, 2006, 08:33:15 PM
Mickey, that was a great story, and I don't know about anyone else reading it, but OMG it felt so real.  Hmmmm, kinda familiar too!  Usually my dart is a 109, and especially when we had the G10.
At least my wife, life co-pilot, is in the other room, and doesn't know anything til the %#@&&*)
Title: Re: Just when
Post by: Oldman731 on December 18, 2006, 08:56:49 PM
Quote
Originally posted by RAPIER
Hmmmm, kinda familiar too!  

True, true.  Bet I do something like that at least once a week.

For years.

- oldman (fun write-up, Big Mickey, thanks)
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Airscrew on December 18, 2006, 09:28:02 PM
Dead on Big Mickey :aok  :rofl .   Happens quite a bit.  Just as I try to line up a shot on a tank or trying to barrel roll out of HO, here comes the wife, "whatcha doin?"  running fingers through my hair, getting down in my face, head blocking the screen, as I frantically try to look around her and see the screen...:lol
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: stickpig on December 18, 2006, 10:07:53 PM
Oh the visuals:lol :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Monster0 on December 18, 2006, 10:52:07 PM
Nice.  

Another good one is telling your lady  "wait I have to land first".
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: trotter on December 18, 2006, 11:02:45 PM
great read
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: SkyRock on December 18, 2006, 11:08:03 PM
That, my friend, is funny as he11!:rofl :aok
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: BaldEagl on December 18, 2006, 11:52:11 PM
Great story.  Strangly familiar.  Wish more would share these 'cause we've all got a few.
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: hubsonfire on December 19, 2006, 12:49:53 AM
:lol  Mine are mostly like this one, except for the type of target, and I tend to miss the ground the first time, and instead slam into it after a loop.
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: sgt203 on December 19, 2006, 04:00:16 AM
LMAO!!!!!!

Thats funny and Im happy to see it not just me!!!!!!

I did exactly the same thing bout two days ago...

I even laughed out loud at myself and my son looked at me like I was nuts:aok
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Skuzzy on December 19, 2006, 06:54:53 AM
ROFL!!  Excellent read!
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Whisky58 on December 19, 2006, 07:33:31 AM
LOL - great build up to the great put down.

What's funny is everyone who reads this is squirming, 'cos we've all done it many times.

What's really sad is that the guys in the Lancs probable never even saw you

;)
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Big Mickey on December 19, 2006, 11:28:40 AM
Quote
Originally posted by Skuzzy
ROFL!!  Excellent read!



WHOOO HOOOOO!!! The teacher liked my story best!!! You all can kiss my.......:rofl

Big Mickey
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Krusty on December 19, 2006, 11:35:10 AM
Okay, now imagine the alt you're at is 20k, the bombers on the deck are b24s delivering the LAST blow to a field over-run by no less than 100 enemy dots (totally swarmed, entire sector full of enemy) and imagine you're in an Me262. Then imagine the same end result. Yep, been there, done that, cried the tears.
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: scottydawg on December 19, 2006, 12:30:21 PM
Nice one Mickey.  I do that all the time too.

My wife's desk is across from mine in our office.  Sometimes I'll be talking on the radio while I'm flying or leaning in to the screen and she'll lean around her monitor and just look at me like 'you're such a dork'.
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Krusty on December 19, 2006, 12:52:31 PM
More like "I married you??"

I'm not married but I know the look. It's that "I can't be associated with you, or I'll be a dork by proxy" look...
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: Shuffler on December 19, 2006, 01:15:45 PM
hehehe great read......
Title: Just when you think you figured it out!
Post by: scottydawg on December 19, 2006, 02:13:16 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Krusty
More like "I married you??"

I'm not married but I know the look. It's that "I can't be associated with you, or I'll be a dork by proxy" look...


I just look back at her and say "Get your own hobby, this one's taken."
:D