Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Ripsnort on February 10, 2007, 09:05:34 AM
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This is a thread about the love for a father. My father will be 77 this year. For the past 28 years, I've had to live 1756 miles from him. Our visits over that time have ben probably 14 to 16 total. I've always felt that I've missed out on a great portion of my life, as well as his, considering the distance between us.
My father has had a tradition dating back to when I was still in diapers...a walleye fishing trip in early June with whomever wanted to go, in Northern Minnesota. Over the years, one by one, all of Dad's fishing buddies have passed away, until his last best friend died this past fall ('06)
In June this year, I'll be flyiing out to Minn and joining him for his annual migration North. The fishing isn't quite as good these days, but the company of a father is like no other. You really learn to appreciate every moment spent with them like its your last when you live so far away.
I suspect my father is ill, but he's not saying anything to anyone. He doesn't like doctors and has been very stubborn on going to the doctor in his lifetime (I used to have to badger him for MONTHS to get his medical updated so we could go flying)
On that note, if you Dad is still living today, call him and tell him you love him.
Here is a photo that was a complete mess, torn, tattered, color almost faded to black and white. I restored this photo on the PC after scanning it. It depicts in my mind, an American pasttime: father and son enjoying a camping trip. This was taken in Northern Minnesota during one of his annual migrations in the late 60's.
(http://pic4.picturetrail.com/VOL767/2726312/14205248/229390876.jpg)
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My dad is the same age... talked to him yesterday.. it was his birthday. Few years ago I gave him and mom a cell phone on my plan.. I hear from them a lot now and they only live a few hours away..
If he shows up I put him to work. he tiled two bathrooms last time and plastered a fireplace. He worked me like a dog when I was growing up.. soooo.. I am carrying out a family tradition too.
He still remodels and plasters for people and will make a couple hundred a day doing it... very few young guys can keep up with him. He built the house he is in now about 4 years ago. He has built maybe a dozen over during his life and lived in most of em...
He worked for habitat for humanity before the government got involved and ruined the program... If you give money to it you are a welfare enabling sucker now... it used to be for people who deserved it...
He recently built a 40 chevy retro hot rod done in 50's style. I will help him pull the motor he wore out soon.. he has put 70k on cross country trips in that car. hell... him and mom put 25k on my Lincoln... they travel more than I do.
lazs
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cool story lazs, thanks for sharing that.
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Good stories, Rip and Laz. I never knew either grandfather and my Dad died in my 20s. He was terrific. Still with me in spirit always.
I have several good friends in their 80s who won't last that much longer. My wife's mother always said the worst thing about growing old is losing your friends. Nothing we can do except enjoy them while we can.
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My dad is 80 years old....still in relatively good health, tho he has had to have hip replacement surgery and heart stints implanted.
Dad and I spent a lot of time hunting, fishing, playing backyard football, and getting involved in church activities....but never enough time to satisfy me however.
Great thread Rip.
Regards, Shuckins
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My Dad is 75. We've been doing an annual fly-fishing trip to the same lake in the SW of the Manitoba since 1989 - never missed a year, no matter where I was living or what I was doing. I'm hoping we'll get at another five or six trips in before I take the lead.
asw
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Where in Minnesota do you go fishing Ripsnort?
Wish I had the same thing going for me. Lost my Dad when I was 23 and he was 45. Lost my son when I was 45 and he was 21. Missed those days on both ends of the deal. Really sucks that way.
Glad you have those times with your Dad though :)
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Most people don't realize what they are missing until it's gone and no longer available. I truly envy those of you who have had your fathers living while you were growing up and later and especially with a good current relationship with them.
If you have a living parent spend time with them, especially in the last years of their life. You will never be able to regain what you will lose when they are gone.
Make sure you nurture a relationship with your kids as well. You'll want to visit with them when your turn to fade comes. We take nothing from this life save memories. Make your baggage worthy to take with you.
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Mine was my Hero all young life .
He was a "Rifeman" in the true sense of the word .
I miss him alot .
If you all didn't know it , you teach your kids how to treat you by how you treat your parents .
Mine love me "alot"
Give him a BIG hug from me Rip
wishing you the best
spro
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Sometimes you hear words that hit a button - "We take nothing from this life save memories. Make your baggage worthy to take with you."
Thanks Mav.
I lost my father (actually step-father but the man who earned the right to be my father) 2 years ago almost to the day - aged 59......
If your parents are still alive get to know them. I didn't how much I didn't know until I had to go through his things ......
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My entire life I never lived more than 15 minutes away from my dad. Although when I was young (0-12) I rarely ever saw him as he was always traveling compliments USAF. Im very very greatful to have finally been able to make up for all that lost time as a kid. My dad and I were very close and as my mom said after he died..."we were each others best friends"
:cry Love you dad
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Rip please call your Dad every Day. Never wait or hesitate. Let him know you Love him.
We had promises of Walleye fishing in Toledo... it became, next year, next year....next year.
Years before, my Dad became my Best Friend. We talked, Shared from the Heart.. words of Forgiveness and Understanding. We talked about everything... Things I held deep.
Last Year, November... I seen my Dad for the last time..I carried my Father for the last time. Arlington National Cem. I miss my Dad, alot.
He was Navy 27 Years... I did Army 20 Years... The Army/Navy Game was Great... we'd call each other over simple game stuff.. downs, fumbles, turnover...everything.*sigh*
I miss my Dad alot.
Mac
I still talk to my Dad.
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I swear Cotton Hill was modeled after my Dad. Of course they had to tone him down about 50 notches for TV.
(http://myspace-812.vo.llnwd.net/00555/21/88/555648812_m.jpg)
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i am happy for you guys who have your fater around and stll share the good times and still have good times.
but i for one wont be calling mine he buggered off with another women and her kids when i was 4 and i have seen him twice in 36 years he dint bother about me so i wont bother about him.
like someone once said you dont miss what you never had,but i am happy for u guys.
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another thing that is good is when both my son and my dad are around at the same time.. this happens a couple of times a year at least... we all have the same name so it is a little confusing tho..
All three of us shooting or working on a hot rod or one of our houses... yeah.. I am pretty lucky.
My dad has been married to the same woman for 58 years. I power through women.. looks like my son may take after grandpa.
It is great when the old man goes to my sons and works on his house.. My son will put all new tires on his car while he is there or do something like that... sons wife is a gem too.
My house is a good place for us all to meet for holidays and such. one of my brothers also lives 30 minutes away as does my grand daughter...
girlfriend lives 60 miles away...
life is good.
lazs
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Originally posted by rpm
I swear Cotton Hill was modeled after my Dad. Of course they had to tone him down about 50 notches for TV.
Heh...sounds just like my (maternal side) grandfather :)
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Originally posted by rogerdee
snip
but i for one wont be calling mine he buggered off with another women and her kids when i was 4 and i have seen him twice in 36 years he dint bother about me so i wont bother about him.
Just a "devil's advocate" question....are you sure your mother didn't drive him away, and then obstruct any efforts at contact he may have made? People tend to automatically blame the dad in cases like this, but sometimes there's two sides to the story.
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well that was the short version
but if you had seen the drinking and wife beating too you would understand why i dont care.
Adults seem to think children dont see or remember things but most do .
no he never tried to come back only after 18 years the first time to say sorry for his mistake lol
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sorry to hear rogerdee
Luckily, my dad has been my mentor and friend from the beginning. I can't say enough about his character. He has 2 degrees. One in computers and the other in accounting. One of the smartest guys I know. Grew up in the Bronx too. His father, my grandfather died in a car accident a year before I was born. But he was also very smart. An architect and armorer for the Germans during WW2. Moved over in '46.
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My dad and I worked together for the past 17 yrs or so. We saw eachother eveyday. Camped on jobsites...work work work. Its all we ever did together. If I stopped in on a Sunday to say hi, he'd talk about work for Monday.
Since I started my own business a few years back I hardly ever see him. Work was everything to him. He has no hobbies. I'd like to go fishing with him this summer, but I know he'll likely have an excuse not to go.
I do love my dad, but our relationship is a bit odd. For the past few years my littlest brother, his son from a second marriage, my 1/2 brother I guess you'd call it, has been to Iraq, and currently is there on his 3rd tour. It tears him up worrying about him. Me too.
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Dad's been gone 2 years now. I always thought I wanted to be like him when I grew up. I'm gonna be 50 this year and I'm still working on it.
One thing I used to do in his later years was call him when I was working on a project or had a home repair to do or even an idea for work. I would pick his brain and let him go on about how he would do it. His wife told me later on that he really loved those calls.
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My Dad passed away in `97.
We were best friends through thick and thin.
In my younger years we did just about everything together......hunt, fish, motorcycles...the works.
Never have met a man that enjoyed life so much. Just the simple everyday things. I think it came from what he went through in WWII that gave him a real appreciation for the simple things and the value of life.
I feel very, very fortunate for the time and the relationship we shared and really feel for those who haven`t been so fortunate.
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Originally posted by Jackal1
I feel very, very fortunate for the time and the relationship we shared and really feel for those who haven`t been so fortunate.
Very well stated. I feel that way too.