Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: DREDIOCK on October 12, 2007, 03:08:29 PM
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Might be a repost .
But well worth re reading.
Or sending to your favorite female who doesnt understand men
We always hear " the rules "
>From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
2. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
3. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.
9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
10. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
11. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
12. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
13. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
14. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
15. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
16. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
17. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
18. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
19. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
20. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
21. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.
22. You have enough clothes.
23. You have too many shoes.
24. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
And Last but not least
251. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
.Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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been posted, but worth repeating. :D
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yep, that one never gets old!:D
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Originally posted by DREDIOCK
16. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Number 16 really dates this one but I still read each line every time I see it and can't help but laugh and nod. An oldie but a goodie.
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Is this one of those Lazs "Manly Men Only" NGA threads? :rofl
Just popped in for a peek! :p
TIGERESS
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Originally posted by Tigeress
Is this one of those Lazs "Manly Men Only" NGA threads? :rofl
Just popped in for a peek! :p
TIGERESS
Nope. Women are allowed and even encouraged to read "the guy rules"
now whether they pay any attention to them or not is another story LOL
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Ahhhh ok... then its safe to wander in... didn't want to get testosterone on me. hahahaha
hummmm about rule 8....
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a Doctor
I had a headache that lasted several months.
I finally went to the Doctor.
He helped me figure out how to get ride of my headache.
When I got home I told my boyfriend of several months to hit the trail! :rofl
TIGERESS
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Originally posted by Tigeress
Ahhhh ok... then its safe to wander in... didn't want to get testosterone on me. hahahaha
hummmm about rule 8....
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a Doctor
I had a headache that lasted several months.
I finally went to the Doctor.
He helped me figure out how to get ride of my headache.
When I got home I told my boyfriend of several months to hit the trail! :rofl
TIGERESS
there ya go.
so long as you were able to idenify the cause and effect LOL
BTW I finally managed to send that PM to ya
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Originally posted by DREDIOCK
there ya go.
so long as you were able to idenify the cause and effect LOL
BTW I finally managed to send that PM to ya
KK, tanks!
TIGERESS
PS: I don't like that toilet seat one... booo
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Originally posted by Tigeress
KK, tanks!
TIGERESS
PS: I don't like that toilet seat one... booo
Look at it this way.
Just be happy we lift it at all :D
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Originally posted by Tigeress
Ahhhh ok... then its safe to wander in... didn't want to get testosterone on me. hahahaha
hummmm about rule 8....
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a Doctor
I had a headache that lasted several months.
I finally went to the Doctor.
He helped me figure out how to get ride of my headache.
When I got home I told my boyfriend of several months to hit the trail! :rofl
TIGERESS
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
psssttttt too bad on the toilet seat thing we LIKE hearing yall fall in in the middle of the night :)
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Originally posted by Tigeress
I had a headache that lasted several months.
I finally went to the Doctor.
He helped me figure out how to get ride of my headache.
When I got home I told my boyfriend of several months to hit the trail! :rofl
TIGERESS
:lol
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Originally posted by DREDIOCK
Look at it this way.
Just be happy we lift it at all :D
Been there... OMG!
mmmmm... sounds like binding arbitration time :p
Like... I wont throw away the well known men's holey worn out Favorite Teeshirt and Jeans "by accident" kinda arbitration...
What do you think? :rofl
TIGERESS
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Originally posted by DREDIOCK 15. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. [/B]
Considering he was so very far off from where he believed he was... this one should probably be removed.
He did indeed need directions... and so do most of y'all.:)
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The only problem with that list is that they should all be number 1. There is NO order that those rules should be followed or understood. They are all equally important:aok
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Originally posted by texasmom
Considering he was so very far off from where he believed he was... this one should probably be removed.
He did indeed need directions... and so do most of y'all.:)
come on t-mom, chris sailed west looking for land and he found it. So what if it was the wrong continent. Give us guys a break. :D
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Originally posted by john9001
come on t-mom, chris sailed west looking for land and he found it. So what if it was the wrong continent. Give us guys a break. :D
touche :D
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When I hear the "Splash" in the middle of the night my first reaction is to yell out "Cannon Ball".
But instead I tend to hide my face into the pillow to supress my laughter and drown out the cussing from the bathroom.
Maybe she needed a map or directions?
:D
Mac
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Originally posted by Tigeress
... didn't want to get testosterone on me. hahahaha
TIGERESS
Funny I had a girlfriend like that once. She Gone.
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Tigeress
I thought you said a few threads back that you were leaving the O'Club?
You're still here.
Mac
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One night very late I had to take a crap but didnt realise I left the seat up, Went to sit then all of a sudden "Holy crap, I should of stopped by now"
Almost ended up in there if I didnt have a corner to grab onto t keep me from falling
Not fun :(
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Originally posted by Tigeress
He helped me figure out how to get ride of my headache.
I`m sure that was just a little slip. :rofl
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:rofl
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my girlfriend once said that she didn't like me leaving the seat up because if she got up in the middle of the night and fell in because of it she was gonna be pissed.
I told her that considering the size of her butt that there was no danger of that.
often... all women need is some reassurance and sympathy.
lazs
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Paper towels, Windex....................... ............................. ....:D
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Originally posted by Tigeress
Been there... OMG!
mmmmm... sounds like binding arbitration time :p
Like... I wont throw away the well known men's holey worn out Favorite Teeshirt and Jeans "by accident" kinda arbitration...
What do you think? :rofl
TIGERESS
You would rarely get that chance with me as most of my old clothes become work clothes.
When they get holes in them I just toss them out myself.
But, ok
You learn to put the seat down yourself and you may throw away my old clothes. Even my favorites. LOL
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My feeling is I have to have the seat down when I crap.
I always manage to remember to check to make sure the seat is down and I havent fallen in yet.
Anyone stupid enough to not check the seat and fall into the bowl.
deserves exactly what they get. :p
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HAHAHAHAHA
Guess I know who's in charge, huh? :p
Reason most men fail at getting such a list of rules past us is...
In the mean time, can anyone guess???
TIGERESS
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Originally posted by Tigeress
HAHAHAHAHA
Guess I know who's in charge, huh? :p
Reason most men fail at getting such a list of rules past us is...
In the mean time, can anyone guess???
TIGERESS
Maybe not at first.
But you'll eventually come around to it ;)