Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Tango on October 21, 2008, 04:19:10 PM
-
A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar.
But what the heck, he says to himself, 'I can really use a drink.'
When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, 'What's the name of your wee-wee?'
The cowboy says, 'Look, I'm not into any of that, all I want is a drink.'
The gay waiter says, 'I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your wee-wee. Mine for instance is called Nike, for the slogan 'Just Do It,' and that guy down at the end of the bar calls his, Snickers, because it really 'Satisfies.''
The cowboy looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second or so to think it over.
So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, 'Hey bud, what's the name of yours?'
The man looks back and says with a smile 'Timex,' an d the thirsty cowboy asks, 'Why Timex?' The fella proudly replies, 'Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!'
A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fellas on his right, who happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, 'So, what do you guys call yours?'
The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, 'FORD, because Quality is Job One.' Then he adds, 'Have you driven a Ford lately?'
The guy next to him then says, 'I call mine CHEVY, 'Like A Rock.'' and gives a wink.
Even more shaken the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name. He exclaims, 'The name of my wee-wee is 'SECRET.' Now give me a dang beer.'
The bartender begins to pour the Cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asked, 'Why Secret?'
The cowboysays:
'Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR
A WOMAN!!!!
-
:rock
-
:rofl :rofl :D :rock
-
:rofl :rofl :aok
-
it's dead, jim.
(http://www.trekmovie.com/tosrem/BoT/kirk_mccoy.jpg)
-
LMAO Tango :rofl
Check this one out
http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/index.php/topic,249224.0.html (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/index.php/topic,249224.0.html)
-
That's good....... :rofl :rofl
-
A cowboy from some backland walks into a bar, plants himself beside a nice girl at the bar and orders a beer.
Dazzled by his original cowboy looks, - and smell, and dust, she asks: "Are you a real cowboy"?
"Yup" he sais, "I sure am, but what are you m'am?"
"I'm a lesbian" she responds.
"A lesbian" he asks quite baffled, "now would you mind telling me what that is?"
"Well, let's say that I am obsessed with women ,steadily think of them, and sometimes succeed in either having sex or relationships with them"
"Okay" sais the cowboy, quite baffled.
After the drink is finished, the girl leaves, and the cowboy has another drink.
Soon there after an elderly couple enter the bar and park themselves close to the cowboy.
Dazzled by his original cowboy style, they ask "Are you a real cowboy???"
"Well" he sais, "I used to think so, but actually now I think I am more of a Lesbian"
-
A cowboy from some backland walks into a bar, plants himself beside a nice girl at the bar and orders a beer.
Dazzled by his original cowboy looks, - and smell, and dust, she asks: "Are you a real cowboy"?
"Yup" he sais, "I sure am, but what are you m'am?"
"I'm a lesbian" she responds.
"A lesbian" he asks quite baffled, "now would you mind telling me what that is?"
"Well, let's say that I am obsessed with women ,steadily think of them, and sometimes succeed in either having sex or relationships with them"
"Okay" sais the cowboy, quite baffled.
After the drink is finished, the girl leaves, and the cowboy has another drink.
Soon there after an elderly couple enter the bar and park themselves close to the cowboy.
Dazzled by his original cowboy style, they ask "Are you a real cowboy???"
"Well" he sais, "I used to think so, but actually now I think I am more of a Lesbian"
:rofl
-
Major General Peter Cosgrove had a nice radio reply as well. (Australian guy)
General Cosgrove was
interviewed on the radio recently.
You'll love his
reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. Regardless
of how you feel about gun laws you gotta love this! This is one of the best
comeback lines of all time. It is a portion of an ABC interview between a female
broadcaster and General Cosgrove who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop
visiting his military headquarters.
FEMALE
INTERVIEWER:
So, General
Cosgrove, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit
your base?
GENERAL
COSGROVE:
We're going to teach
them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.
FEMALE
INTERVIEWER:
Shooting! That's a
bit irresponsible, isn't it?
GENERAL
COSGROVE:
I don't see why,
they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.
FEMALE
INTERVIEWER:
Don't you admit
that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching
children?
GENERAL
COSGROVE:
I don't see how. We
will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a
firearm.
FEMALE
INTERVIEWER:
But you're
equipping them to become violent killers.
GENERAL
COSGROVE:
Well, Ma'am, you're
equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you?