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General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: SEraider on August 17, 2009, 01:04:21 PM

Title: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: SEraider on August 17, 2009, 01:04:21 PM
Friday, I was in my office when this real wierd scratching noise started happening. I open my blinds and gang member (or looks therof) was writing gang letters on my window.  He saw me, and bolted.

I got in my car and chased him down.  I told him to come here to talk to me. He hesitated until I insisted and I threatened to call the cops.  I parked and he finally came over.  He was very nervious and tried to walk away.  I told him I was not going to hurt him or call the cops but asked him to listen.

After telling him that if the motive was to impress his friends, or for whatever reason, he need to think about the $200+ damage to my window and he could go to jail. 

I also told him that if he went to jail, he becomes a number, lost in the system, hardened to do the same thing once he got out.  To me, jail was not the answer but to give him a pretty good earful.  I asked him to never do this again and for his sake I hope he does not.  I believe the best thing I could have told him in the earfull was for him to do is "think" before doing anything.  He is 14 years old and I told him to remember he has a family that would be greatly dissapointed.

I hope I did the right thing for his sake.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Fender16 on August 17, 2009, 01:09:48 PM
I think you have a lot of guts to approach him, even though he was only 14 or so. Never know what he may have on him.
Sadly, if he was dumb enough to do such a thing, I doubt most of what you said actually stuck in his mind.
I do think it was the right thing to do and much props. :aok
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Russian on August 17, 2009, 01:14:51 PM
I have a feeling that in next few days you might have all of your windows pained...  :devil
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: weazely on August 17, 2009, 01:16:52 PM
Friday, I was in my office when this real wierd scratching noise started happening. I open my blinds and gang member (or looks therof) was writing gang letters on my window.  He saw me, and bolted.

I got in my car and chased him down.  I told him to come here to talk to me. He hesitated until I insisted and I threatened to call the cops.  I parked and he finally came over.  He was very nervious and tried to walk away.  I told him I was not going to hurt him or call the cops but asked him to listen.

After telling him that if the motive was to impress his friends, or for whatever reason, he need to think about the $200+ damage to my window and he could go to jail. 

I also told him that if he went to jail, he becomes a number, lost in the system, hardened to do the same thing once he got out.  To me, jail was not the answer but to give him a pretty good earful.  I asked him to never do this again and for his sake I hope he does not.  I believe the best thing I could have told him in the earfull was for him to do is "think" before doing anything.  He is 14 years old and I told him to remember he has a family that would be greatly dissapointed.

I hope I did the right thing for his sake.

It is nice to know not everyone in this world blows up without thinking about it.  But no I do not think you were hard on him at all.  You actually were really calm it seems and the kid should be happy.  But for him learning his lessons.... There is a slight chance he might rethink his actions but i doubt it.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: PFactorDave on August 17, 2009, 01:22:50 PM
I would watch your back for the next few days.  If he is a gang member, he and his older punk buddies might decide to make an example of you.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: mbailey on August 17, 2009, 02:00:28 PM
Glad your safe and this didnt end badly. This was a news story in the making.

I think what you did took real guts, and hopefully the kid will think about your words the next time he does ( or thinks about ) doing this.

If not you can say you tried, but more importantly gave the kid a second chance.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Vudak on August 17, 2009, 02:13:24 PM
Like others have said, it took guts for you to approach him.  I'd take people up on their advice to watch your back for the next few days, just in case.

Unfortunately, if this kid really is in a gang, I have to figure the gang's pressure on him is going to outweigh yours.

I'm probably being optimistic, but I think there's at least a chance some of what you said will sink in...  It was always the "phew!" moments that left the most lasting impression on me...
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: mbailey on August 17, 2009, 02:36:42 PM
It was always the "phew!" moments that left the most lasting impression on me...

QFT, was thinking this myself
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: John Curnutte on August 17, 2009, 03:02:16 PM
 Well I think its worth a try , although as my family are all cops in our neiborhood ( as we live within sight of each other ) and they would think its dangerous . Who knows maybe the kid will grow up and invent something great or do something worthwhile for humanity . SERaider you got my support , after all why bust a kid for this when a talk might get it done just fine .
                                                                      Nutte :salute
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: oakranger on August 17, 2009, 03:14:43 PM
i would have call the cops to scare the crapout of him.  don't press any charges but put him in a situation that would really make him think twice before joining any gang or do anything stupid.  is there a program where they take trouble teens to a correction system so they can see first hand life behind bars.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: stodd on August 17, 2009, 03:27:52 PM
You handled it much better then I would have SEraider.  :aok
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: john9001 on August 17, 2009, 03:47:10 PM
""was writing gang letters on my window""

sounds like he is in a gang.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: SEraider on August 17, 2009, 03:52:00 PM
I have a feeling that in next few days you might have all of your windows pained...  :devil


 :rofl

So far so good on my window. We'll see.  ;)
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: SEraider on August 17, 2009, 03:55:16 PM
I would watch your back for the next few days.  If he is a gang member, he and his older punk buddies might decide to make an example of you.


Yeah I though of that, but we shook hands in the end and I think we wont.  It would be in plain sight of hundreds of people so I doubt it. 

But, in the spirit of saftey, I shall go into  :noid mode.

 :lol
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Anodizer on August 17, 2009, 04:05:42 PM
Had a similar incident from the one of the "kids" (he's 25) down the street..  His alcoholic dad beat and abused he and his brother unmercifully while they were growing up..  They are both products of their environment, disrespectful to anyone, no matter who it is...  Anyhow, both have been in and out of jail their entire lives..  Both(as well as the father) have several felonies each..  One day ,the younger of the "kids" came over to ask if he could use the phone..  I let him use the home..  Afterwards, he asked for a ride to a pawnshop to sell off some old video games..  On the way there, I offered the dude a job in my kitchen, only to have him disappear on me and not show up for work once he got a paycheck (sound familiar??) as well as stealing an entire dry aged tenderloin worth around $200.00..  He partied his entire paycheck away and had no intention of returning to work seeing that I called the cops on him for theft..  Plus, he landed in jail on a public intox and assault charge..  When he was finally released, he stopped over and I told him that I was done with him..  That I'd given him a chance to step up and be a productive citizen..  After this, I received threats and shoutings saying things like "I run this block m-fer!  This is my block b*tch" and so forth..  Funny thing is, this isn't "that kind" of neighbor hood and all my redneck neighbors made sure he knew that every little thing he did was being watched....  Now, he doesn't walk down the street anymore, but jumps the fence in his backyard when ever he has to walk somewhere..  Amazing...  A 25 year old man, who still lives with his father, had no job, no car, no anything...  "This is my block!!  I run this m-fer!!" indeed!!!  LMAO


A majority of these idiots are not worth taking any time to deal with in such a manner..  It is very rare that you will find one that you can reason with on any level..                                  You, my friend are quite lucky, however it may still come back to bite you in the arse...
It's amazing to see what these kids start to think when someone gives them a good talking-to..  A lot of them see it as "disrespect" and will seek retaliation especially after they are
egged on by all their hood-brothas...  "You gonna let him talk to you like dat??"

These kinds of people have a sense of entitlement for some reason..  They think that what ever they want is theirs..  What ever they want to do, they can do, no matter who it hurts....
Many times, they are very primitive in their thinking and don't understand much more than a sharp blow to the head....
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Bodhi on August 17, 2009, 06:00:15 PM
You should have cut his hand off...
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Serenity on August 17, 2009, 06:17:07 PM
Many times, they are very primitive in their thinking and don't understand much more than a sharp blow to the head....

SEraider, you are a much stronger man than I am for being able to simply talk to the kid. I find myself agreeing with Anodizer's statement personally, having grown up next to many of these types, in a similar situation to most. I don't believe in "product of your environment". I have seen kids in much better situations than mine turn foul, and kids who literally grew up in the gutter make it as some of the best people I have met.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: uptown on August 17, 2009, 06:33:00 PM
WTG Raider. Hopefully he'll think next time before he does something like this again. You handled the situation like a truly caring individual. Unlike myself, who would have tried to wipe my car off with his face. :lol :salute
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Dago on August 17, 2009, 06:44:28 PM
While not many seem to agree with me that graffiti should be a capital offense, I like Singapores way of handling it, you spray, you get your butt lashed with a bamboo cane.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Widewing on August 17, 2009, 09:16:48 PM
Yes.....
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: mechanic on August 17, 2009, 11:24:42 PM
Good one Raider, when i was in trouble as a kid i respected adults who acted like that more than anyone else. He wont come back because he would be ashamed to have to look you in the eye next time.

 
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: SEraider on August 17, 2009, 11:56:41 PM
Good one Raider, when i was in trouble as a kid i respected adults who acted like that more than anyone else. He wont come back because he would be ashamed to have to look you in the eye next time.

 


I would hope for that, but more importantly that he never does this to anybody and respect personal property.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: SunBat on August 18, 2009, 06:04:32 AM
Most likely nothing YOU do will make a difference. Sad but true.
Title: Re: Was I too easy on this guy?
Post by: Denholm on August 18, 2009, 12:06:31 PM
Nicely done.

While I'm trying to train myself to say what I mean, I don't think I'm at a point where I would rely on my ability to get their attention verbally. I would probably side with others in calling the police while following the guy. As for pressing charges or simply talking with him, I'm not sure which of the two I would choose. Right now I'm leaning toward the, "pressing charges" side.