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General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: SEraider on January 23, 2010, 11:39:58 AM

Title: World News - Funny
Post by: SEraider on January 23, 2010, 11:39:58 AM
....from a chain email I got.............

European Security Levels.

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats
and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon,
though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even
"A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in
1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized
from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued
a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

The Scots raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the
Bastards" They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have
been used on the frontline in the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror
alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France
are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent
terrorist attack that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively
paralyzing the country's military capability. It's not only the French
who are on a heightened level of alert.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to
"Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective
Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance"
to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher
levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish
navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans meanwhile are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of
their allies, just in case.
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: DaCoon on January 23, 2010, 12:00:48 PM
 :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: oakranger on January 23, 2010, 12:03:01 PM
 :rofl
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Lepape2 on January 23, 2010, 12:11:38 PM
"Italy...blah blah... and "Change Sides."  :rofl
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: DaCoon on January 23, 2010, 12:13:58 PM
Hey wait up a sec....he forgot the Canadians......
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: jay on January 23, 2010, 12:15:54 PM
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl


so funny yet so true.....
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: SEraider on January 23, 2010, 12:33:39 PM
......destroyed France's white flag factory.....

Now that's classic.  :D
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Denholm on January 23, 2010, 12:39:17 PM
Germany was more true than France.
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Mar on January 23, 2010, 01:30:18 PM
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl



...


Nah I think it needs a few more:
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: minke on January 23, 2010, 01:49:16 PM
Hey wait up a sec....he forgot the Canadians......

maybe Canada could be

"I saw a gun once........"

to

"now i have a gun,maybe I should get some bullets"
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Reaper90 on January 23, 2010, 01:49:46 PM
I just had a double order of  :rofl :rofl with a side order of  :bolt:
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Phantomz on January 23, 2010, 02:11:23 PM
The german one was good.  :salute
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: SEraider on January 25, 2010, 10:56:27 AM
I like the Spanish Glass bottoms.  :lol
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: phatzo on January 25, 2010, 03:50:51 PM
Australia only has one security status
"Bugger it."
Title: Re: World News - Funny
Post by: Spikes on January 25, 2010, 04:47:53 PM
:rofl