Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Dadano on January 19, 2011, 11:57:24 PM
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Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my dog, Casper, and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me . I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
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:rofl :rofl :aok
Standing in line at Costco I had a guy look at the two, fifty pound bags of dog food and box of the dog biscuits I was buying and he says I'm sure glad I don't have to spend that kind of money on a dog. I told him I didn't mind, that I in fact like dogs better than most people I've met. He didn't have any other comments.
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:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Funniest thing I've read in quite a while!
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well i think costco is at fault here, why they giving out membership to s doofus lady :huh
great post :aok :aok hahahhaha!!!
<S> greens
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Now THAT's funny! :rofl
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:rofl :rofl :rofl
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:rofl :rofl :rofl
one time i was waiting in the check out line with my son, about 9 years ago, there was a lady in front of us (rather heavyset)all of a sudden her phone or pager went off making this beep beeping sound, lol my son looks at me and goes Dad look out she's backing up :rofl
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:rofl
why would the shop ban you just for cracking a joke!
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:rofl :rofl :rofl
one time i was waiting in the check out line with my son, about 9 years ago, there was a lady in front of us (rather heavyset)all of a sudden her phone or pager went off making this beep beeping sound, lol my son looks at me and goes Dad look out she's backing up :rofl
WIN! :aok
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:rofl :aok
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:rofl :rofl :rofl :aok
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From a psycho-social perspective.... WAIT WAIT WAIT, is this just a joke?
If not...... The only questions I have for you is what was the age difference between you two? Do you wear a wedding ring?
Odds are if she was in your age range, she found you handsome. If she was young, she was just mildly impaired with perceptual thinking.
:salute
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From a psycho-social perspective.... WAIT WAIT WAIT, is this just a joke?
If not...... The only questions I have for you is what was the age difference between you two? Do you wear a wedding ring?
Odds are if she was in your age range, she found you handsome. If she was young, she was just mildly impaired with perceptual thinking.
:salute
I was thinking the same thing!
At OP: :rofl :rofl