Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: ebfd11 on August 15, 2011, 12:06:59 PM

Title: Redneck Census form
Post by: ebfd11 on August 15, 2011, 12:06:59 PM
Last name: ________________

(Check appropriate box)
First name:
[_] Billy-Bob
[_] Bobby-Sue
[_] Billy-Joe
[_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray
[_] Bobby-Ann
[_] Billy-Sue
[_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae
[_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack
[_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue

Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)

Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right ____ What are shoes

Occupation:
[_] Farmer
[_] Mechanic
[_] Hair Dresser
[_] Waitress
[_] Un-employed
[_] Dirty Politician

Spouse's Name: __________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: __________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: __________________________
Lover's Name: __________________________
2nd Lover's Name: __________________________

Relationship with spouse:
[_] Sister
[_] Aunt
[_] Brother
[_] Uncle
[_] Mother
[_] Son
[_] Father
[_] Daughter
[_] Cousin
[_] Pet

Number of children living in household: ___
Number of children living in shed: ___
Number of children that are yours: ___

Mother's Name: _______________________

Father's Name: _______________________
(If not sure, leave blank)

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you [_] own or [_] rent your mobile home?
(Check appropriate box)

Vehicles you own and where you keep them:
___ Total number of vehicles you own
___ Number of vehicles that still crank
___ Number of vehicles in front yard
___ Number of vehicles in back yard
___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks

Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck
____ kitchen
____ bedroom
____ bathroom
____ shed

Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194__

Number of road kills presently in your freezer?
[ ] 3
[ ] 5
[ ] 10 or more

Do you have a gun rack?
[_] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
[_] The National Enquirer
[_] The Globe
[_] TV Guide
[_] Soap Opera Digest
[_] Rifle and Shotgun

___ Number of times you've seen a UFO
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

How often do you bathe:
[_] Weekly
[_] Monthly
[_] Not Applicable

How many teeth? ___
Color of teeth:
[_] Yellow
[_] Brownish-Yellow
[_] Brown
[_] Black
[_] N/A

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
[_] Red-Man

How far is your home from a paved road?
[_] 1 mile
[_] 2 miles
[_] don't know

Number of hours it took you to complete this exam
[_] 1-2
[_] 2-4
[_] 4-10
[_] 10-24
[_] Had someone else fill it out for me

Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: skorpion on August 15, 2011, 12:46:23 PM
Last name: bananabo-hilley

(Check appropriate box)
First name:
[X] Billy-Bob
[_] Bobby-Sue
[_] Billy-Joe
[_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray
[_] Bobby-Ann
[_] Billy-Sue
[_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae
[_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack
[_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue

Age: 30 (if unsure, guess)

Sex: _X_ M _____ F _____ Not sure

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right _X_ What are shoes

Occupation:
[_] Farmer
[_] Mechanic
[_] Hair Dresser
[_] Waitress
[_] Un-employed
[X] Dirty Politician

Spouse's Name: whats that?
2nd Spouse's Name: do i have a therd won?
3rd Spouse's Name: uhhh...
Lover's Name: bertha
2nd Lover's Name: lil' chunk

Relationship with spouse:
[_] Sister
[_] Aunt
[_] Brother
[_] Uncle
[_] Mother
[_] Son
[_] Father
[_] Daughter
[_] Cousin
[X] Pet

Number of children living in household: 25
Number of children living in shed: 8
Number of children that are yours: 1

Mother's Name: ms. chunk

Father's Name: _______________________
(If not sure, leave blank)

Education: X->1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you [_] own or [X] rent your mobile home?
(Check appropriate box)

Vehicles you own and where you keep them:
12 Total number of vehicles you own
7 Number of vehicles that still crank
4 Number of vehicles in front yard
2 Number of vehicles in back yard
8 Number of vehicles on cement blocks

Firearms you own and where you keep them: shotgun, pistol, rifle, shotgun.
____ truck
____ kitchen
____ bedroom
X___ bathroom
____ shed

Model and year of your pickup: dodge ram____ 1941

Number of road kills presently in your freezer?
[ ] 3
[ ] 5
[X] 10 or more

Do you have a gun rack?
[X] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
[_] The National Enquirer
[_] The Globe
[X] TV Guide
[_] Soap Opera Digest
[X] Rifle and Shotgun

47_ Number of times you've seen a UFO
_5_ Number of times you've seen Elvis
_190 Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

How often do you bathe:
[_] Weekly
[X] Monthly
[_] Not Applicable

How many teeth? 13
Color of teeth:
[_] Yellow
[_] Brownish-Yellow
[X] Brown
[_] Black
[_] N/A

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
[X] Red-Man

How far is your home from a paved road?
[_] 1 mile
[_] 2 miles
[X] don't know

Number of hours it took you to complete this exam
[_] 1-2
[_] 2-4
[_] 4-10
[X] 10-24
[_] Had someone else fill it out for me 

 
Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: AHTbolt on August 15, 2011, 01:01:30 PM
Thats just all kinda wrong LOL
Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: Hap on August 15, 2011, 06:33:35 PM
too long and too funny
Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: DaCoon on August 15, 2011, 06:34:36 PM
have to clean the monitor now...... :rofl
Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: SmokinLoon on August 15, 2011, 10:07:05 PM
We should do one for the ghetto too.  That would be too true though, wouldnt it?   ;)
Title: Re: Redneck Census form
Post by: Mano on August 16, 2011, 05:14:47 PM
 :D


 :aok