Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Buzzard7 on November 01, 2011, 01:16:02 PM
-
Sorry Skuzzy forgot about the first line. This should be better.
Who's Getting Old?
ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the
teenager at the counter.
'You don't?' I replied.
'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.
'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'
'That's right.'
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets
(Unbelievable but sadly true...)
(must have been the same one I asked for sweetener and she said they didn't have any, only splenda and sugar.)
TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this
is?'
I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'
She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.
THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her
floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.
When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was
shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.' (keep shuddering!!)
FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.
'Do you need some help?' I asked.
She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the
battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I
can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenience store) would
have a battery to fit this?'
'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.
'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,
handing it and the car keys to me. As I
took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and
check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'
PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!
FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and
said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I
do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the
secretary told her. With that, the intern took
her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it
on the photocopier and proceeded to make five
'blank' copies.
Brunette, by the way!!
SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had
eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the
kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the
mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'
Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency!'
Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!
Someone had to remind me, so I'm reminding you too. Don't laugh.....it is all true...
Forward this to every one you can remember right now!
Never, under any circumstances,
take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night!
-
Sad to say but I too have experienced similar situations. Seems some just forgot what common sense is.
-
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl funny stuff :aok
-
:headscratch: It's sad, but luckily, not every single person is like this.
One thing I hate other than stupid people, people who think since almost all teenagers/people under 30 are dumb, everyone else must be dumb too. Wait 10 years and we might just invent a cure for cancer and save your old, ignorant arse.
-
When i worked at a Dunkin Donuts in a Shaws shopping complex a truck driver came in and asked me how to get to the local Shaws Supermarket. I told him to get in his truck and start it up, go through as many gears as he could, as quick as he could, when he heard the crash he arrived at the store. Now mind you he was facing the store with 16' lit lettering at night, lit up. He then asked me "How long do you think it will take me to get there." I physically showed him from the front of my store where he had to go.
-
Forwarding your emails to a forum??
The door you unlocked on the car probably wont help much. Most automatic locks also disable the ignition.
All funny... even funnier had they really happened.
-
So I am old and ignorant now?
Guess I'll post things on the squad forum where they are not as thin skinned.
Ignorant would be thinking your ship would never sink.
Well I did copy and paste it. Forgot to remove a couple of lines. Oh well
-
sadly but true all these are fake, seen them in one form or another since the 80's. except back then they would pass photocopies around instead of email.
semp
-
Forwarding your emails to a forum??
The door you unlocked on the car probably wont help much. Most automatic locks also disable the ignition.
All funny... even funnier had they really happened.
:aok
-
Saw this, not sure how true it is.
http://www.militarylulz.com/facebookview.php?id=436 (http://www.militarylulz.com/facebookview.php?id=436)
-
So I am old and ignorant now?
Guess I'll post things on the squad forum where they are not as thin skinned.
Ignorant would be thinking your ship would never sink.
Well I did copy and paste it. Forgot to remove a couple of lines. Oh well
Did I call you any of that? :headscratch:
Take out your reading glasses, "old man". :)
-
:rofl :rofl
reminds me of some kids at my school. half of the people there can't read a clock :bolt:
there are also kids in honors reading who can't read.
there was a kid in an honors math class that couldn't multiply,and guess what they all have in common? they still manage to pass with an A :bhead
People wonder why the kids are so stupid these days.
Half the time in class we aren't doing anything in class I haven't seen something that we have actually had to think about in a while.
I practically beg for teachers that actually give us something where we our brain actually engages instead of looking up definitions in the back of some stupid history book.'
All the kids around me go, "awww man, your so smart, how did you get all A's on your report card???" my answer is always,"I have strong hands."
With how the school systems are now, I could pass without being in class one day.
They even have this program in our school called "No Child Left Behind"
It makes it where you almost have to try to get held back. With how many chances these kids get, there is no incentive for kids with an IQ over 20 to do good in nschool. :bhead :bhead :bhead
-
:headscratch: It's sad, but luckily, not every single person is like this.
One thing I hate other than stupid people, people who think since almost all teenagers/people under 30 are dumb, everyone else must be dumb too. Wait 10 years and we might just invent a cure for cancer and save YOUR OLD,INGNORANT ARSE.
MY mistake. Thought that was directed toward me. Can someone tell me if I read that wrong.
-
The door you unlocked on the car probably wont help much. Most automatic locks also disable the ignition.
My truck remote just died, but it still starts up. '02 F-150. <I semi-hate pwr locks/windows.>
if this is the new standard - meh...
-
MY mistake. Thought that was directed toward me. Can someone tell me if I read that wrong.
it's his use of the word "your"...after reading it a couple of times i realize he's generalizing and basically saying...older people think anyone under 30 is dumb.
:headscratch: It's sad, but luckily, not every single person is like this.
One thing I hate other than stupid people, people who think since almost all teenagers/people under 30 are dumb, everyone else must be dumb too. Wait 10 years and we might just invent a cure for cancer and save your old, ignorant arse.
hate to put the bee in your bonnet but...10 years from now high school graduates will be considered geniuses if they can actually spell something besides their birth names correctly.
yo j y u b h8n? wher u gon b l8r 2da? - is not in any manner correct
and 1.00 - .95 should not require a calculator to figure out.
-
There's always going to be dumb people, I see them everyday.
I personally use "text language" with my friends, and I don't think I'm dumb, hopefully you guys don't think I'm dumb either. But if I started to use SAT vocabulary word with my friends, I doubt I would have any friends after a week.
On the other hand, I'm not going to use text language on this forum, because I know my audience are *mostly* mature/well educated people.
A few of my friends are very smart, smarter than me, but they can't seem to know when to use the proper style of speaking/writing. And besides, it's high school, which is more or less a joke (excluding SATs), when college comes, I'm sure the smart and the dumb are going to be weeded out, and the smart-but-still-act-dumb people (like the friends I described), are going to learn the proper way to present themselves, and everything will be sorted out.
-
titanic, i work at a large private university...i see reasons every day to have my doubts. you and your friends are most likely part of the 10% of the student population who can actually tie their shoes, let alone add numbers without a calculator. unfortunately, intelligent people reproduce in limited numbers...the dumb ones reproduce like mice. do the math...
-
Dumb people produce nothing, as long as there is a percentage of smart people alive and kicking, we'll get through the next generation.
I promise to take care of you Gyrene when you retire, with my taxes. :D
-
If all the retarded people in the world suddenly died i'm sure the worlds population would be cut in half, shame we have to waste our resources
titanic, i work at a large private university...i see reasons every day to have my doubts. you and your friends are most likely part of the 10% of the student population who can actually tie their shoes, let alone add numbers without a calculator. unfortunately, intelligent people reproduce in limited numbers...the dumb ones reproduce like mice. do the math...
I was actually discussing that topic with my friend, I don't understand why people do it when times and resources are becoming more difficult to come by, and people in other places that have severe food shortages still having more and more kids
-
The door you unlocked on the car probably wont help much. Most automatic locks also disable the ignition.
That's pretty much incorrect. While it is true that some "aftermarket" alarm systems won't enable the ignition, fuel, and/or the starter until the system is disarmed (which usually involves unlocking the doors) I have yet to see this to be the case with a factory FOB (remote) system. Even in that email she said that she did not have an alarm. Most cars these days read a binary code that is transmitted by the ignition key itself to determine whether or not to allow the vehicle to start - but this would be in the key itself and not the remote.
While I'm sure this 'viral' e-mail is false it's still quite possible that a lot of it actually happened. I've seen some pretty stupid people in my day!
-
Adding to my earlier post.... if sense is so common, how come so few actually use it?
While i my be a GED graduate, I'm not dumb by any stretch. I have learned in my 42 yrs of life reasoning and problem solving skills. There isn't very many tasks or jobs that I can't learn in a short amount of time. Mostly because I apply myself 110% to learning new skills and trades as the need arises.
:salute to all those that can and do. :D
-
Forwarding your emails to a forum??
The door you unlocked on the car probably wont help much. Most automatic locks also disable the ignition.
All funny... even funnier had they really happened.
they may be fake why add anecdotal evedance My vehicle starts fine I can lock the doors with the remote unlock with the key and still start the vehicle. Just saying
-
.. next time you go to a restaurant order plain tea.. there is a good chance they only have sweetneed and unsweetened tea.
-
If all the retarded people in the world suddenly died i'm sure the worlds population would be cut in half, shame we have to waste our resources
I hate people who use the word "retarded" out of context. You know how bad you sound when you say that?
-
.. next time you go to a restaurant order plain tea.. there is a good chance they only have sweetneed and unsweetened tea.
sure go to los angeles, go into any restaurant and ask for sweet tea, they probably will tell you they dont have it, but order ice tea instead, pretty sure they have plenty. or go to the south and if they ask you if you want sweet tea, just say, sure but with sweet and low, they will give you that confused look. or even better ask for splenda, most likely they will tell you she dont work there.
does anybody on the east cost know what weak sauce means? or how about a bar-bq it has different meanings in los angeles or in the south.
semp
-
A colleague once asked me for the conversion factor between British metric and German metric.
I told him to multiply by one.