Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Penguin on March 16, 2012, 07:13:12 PM

Title: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Penguin on March 16, 2012, 07:13:12 PM
Post your experiences and quotes with buzzwords, catchphrases, and jargon that really ground your gears.  Quotes are even better.

My High School's Mission Statement:

"Walpole Public Schools is a diverse learning community 
that encourages all students to maximize their full potential potential 
and celebrates their achievements. With a professional
and caring staff we are committed to providing a rigorous
education to enable our students to reach their own level of
excellence. Through a collaborative partnership with home and
community we educate all our students to become responsible
citizens and life-long learners in a global society."

Though I'm all for having a better school, this mission statement is so broad that it can justify anything, yet means nothing.  Even my English teacher, who was on the committee who wrote that, said that he not only loathes it but couldn't understand it with a Master's degree in English from BU.

-Penguin
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Mar on March 16, 2012, 07:40:57 PM
My first thought is, "Not sure I'd want to send my kid to that school..."

Looks like a big mess of words designed specifically to attempt to impress the reader. Much, much more complicated than it needs to be, just like the rest of the world today.


I can't think of anything at the moment, but when I do it'll be a doozy.
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Krupinski on March 16, 2012, 07:46:37 PM
.
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: kilo2 on March 16, 2012, 08:14:00 PM
"With a passion"

Or

"Catch you on the flip side"

Both really annoy me.
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: jeep00 on March 16, 2012, 08:55:24 PM
I believe that mission statement is actually quite well done from a business standpoint. Unfortunately they neglected to make sure all stakeholders could understand it. Hopefully most can, ilike parents and staff, but I doubt the students can fully understand it because they have not been fully exposed to the business environment.
Bummer the English teacher is so confounded by it.
If this is in Walpole NH they have far more critical and painful things to come to grips with than students not understanding business.

Bob
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Penguin on March 16, 2012, 10:07:55 PM
I know what the statement means, and that's why I detest it.  The goals are too broad and immeasurable.  It's Walpole, MA.

-Penguin
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: uptown on March 16, 2012, 10:35:06 PM
I've never added anyone to my ignore list......................... ...............until today.
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: B-17 on March 17, 2012, 01:24:11 AM
I've never added anyone to my ignore list......................... ...............until today.

:lol I :salute you sir :aok
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Tom5572 on March 17, 2012, 03:41:07 AM
Post your experiences and quotes with buzzwords, catchphrases, and jargon that really ground your gears.  Quotes are even better.

My High School's Mission Statement:

"Walpole Public Schools is a diverse learning community 
that encourages all students to maximize their full potential potential 
and celebrates their achievements. With a professional
and caring staff we are committed to providing a rigorous
education to enable our students to reach their own level of
excellence. Through a collaborative partnership with home and
community we educate all our students to become responsible
citizens and life-long learners in a global society."

Though I'm all for having a better school, this mission statement is so broad that it can justify anything, yet means nothing.  Even my English teacher, who was on the committee who wrote that, said that he not only loathes it but couldn't understand it with a Master's degree in English from BU.

-Penguin

We celebrate assisting every one to reach mediocracy.
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Wildcat1 on March 17, 2012, 04:09:36 AM
We celebrate assisting every one to reach mediocracy.

Nailed it
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Maverick on March 17, 2012, 01:49:41 PM
Let me break it down for you. This kind of statement is provided to the "masses" and written to impress the "elite" into thinking they are getting something for their taxes.

.

My High School's Mission Statement:

"Walpole Public Schools is a diverse learning community  
that encourages all students to maximize their full potential potential  
and celebrates their achievements.
Translation: We are a public school and must accept every student. If a private school, it means we accept every student as long as their parents have money for the tuition. Because we want you to think everything is roses and rainbows we will not fail anyone so everyone gets to pass. If you can breathe, chew gum, and not knock over the furniture, you will make the honor roll and get a pretty ribbon. If all you do is show up you will still get the diploma and we will tie a pretty ribbon on it for you.

.
With a professional
and caring staff we are committed to providing a rigorous
education to enable our students to reach their own level of
excellence.

Our staff went to the proper ivory walled  schools, have the state required diploma and can function in a literate yet non functional environment. We all suck up to the proper government agencies and use the rose colored glasses to provide hyperbole rather than content. Our staff, while educated, is not necessarily equipped to actually teach your little darling anything without using a hammer and crowbar to gain their attention, so if little Johnie or Joanie can't read it's not our fault.

.
Through a collaborative partnership with home and
community we educate all our students to become responsible
citizens and life-long learners in a global society." [/center]

.

If we fail to educate the little cretins you stuff through the door it is not our fault it is yours for failure to reproduce and provide something with real intelligence to accept our brilliant thinking and material. We expect you to have the little snot lockers clean, awake, fed and somewhat potty trained by the time they get to school. We will then try to train them to repeat the same trite phrases that are politically correct and acceptable by those we consider to be experts. If you do not agree with our premise you are obviously not capable of seeing the reality we preach and teach. Our reality is all there is so accept it or just pay the tuition and we will send letters home with your little darling to blow smoke up your dress and make you think they are truly capable of functioning in our idea of utopia. If they can't, it's not our fault. They will be able to find the welfare office once we are done.


Just a note here. In addition to more than 35 years outside of the education arena where I worked and experienced life in multiple positions, I do have a MA in ED and class teaching experience at grade school through college level as well as Military instruction. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.

Mission statements are fancy worded documents meant to impress. It don't really mean that it fits the real world however.......  :old: :neener: :devil
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Rash on March 17, 2012, 02:30:55 PM
My school didn't have a written mission statement.  We knew the rules and every school employee had a paddle (except the janitor).  Behave or get your bellybutton beat.  


Edit.  lol belly button.  The area I was referring too is on the other side and about foot lower.  Although, a bellybutton beating sounds more painful....
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Arlo on March 17, 2012, 02:45:59 PM
My school didn't have a written mission statement.  We knew the rules and every school employee had a paddle (except the janitor).  Behave or get your bellybutton beat.  


Edit.  lol belly button.  The area I was referring too is on the other side and about foot lower.  Although, a bellybutton beating sounds more painful....


Your janitor didn't have a paddle? Limited budget?
Title: Re: Jargon and Boilerplate
Post by: Rash on March 17, 2012, 10:47:55 PM
No, think he was in the union.  Only a screwdriver on Tuesday.