Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Toad on April 17, 2002, 11:25:45 AM
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THE SENILITY PRAYER
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm older (but refuse to grow up) here's what I've discovered....
ONE - I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
TWO - My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.
THREE - I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
FOUR - Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.
FIVE - All reports are in, life is now officially unfair.
SIX - If all is not lost, where is it?
SEVEN - It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
EIGHT - Some days you are the dog, some days you're the hydrant.
NINE - I wish the buck stopped here, I sure could use a few.
TEN - Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
ELEVEN - Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
TWELVE - It's hard to make a come back when you haven't been anywhere.
THIRTEEN - The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.
FOURTEEN - If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
FIFTEEN - When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?
SIXTEEN - It's not hard to meet expenses...they're everywhere.
SEVENTEEN - The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
EIGHTEEN - These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.
NINETEEN - I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS
TO YOU BEFORE OR NOT
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I like it! Stolen , forwarded,and posted elsewhere, thanks!
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you can tell you're getting older when you bend down to tie your shoes and before you stand up you look around for other things to take care of while your down there.
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TWENTY - you notice your testicles are bouyant in mundane daily circumstances where they previously never even got wet.