Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Tumor on June 03, 2002, 02:02:23 AM
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..seen that commercial? Can't tell if thier in a diner or friends in a house but, the guy is yelling at the blonde, holding her by the arm and threatening to "knock her into next week". Meanwhile wimpola #1 is sitting there ignoring everything while his little boy has this "shocked" look on his face.
....am I alone here or would anyone else here get up and loosen a few of that amazinhunks teeth? (best friend or not?)
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Been there and done that, usually to find the 'victim' cracking you in the head with a bottle or whatever’s handy.
As I've grown older I've learned to stay out of couples fights unless she seems to be in immediate danger.
If it's really serious she has time to leave him or put up with it, (her choice), and 99 times out of 100 she's gonna forgive him in 2 days anyway leaving you as the meddling salamander
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I see too many of those at work. Trust me Apathy, it's never better to "stay out of couples fights unless she seems to be in immediate danger". If it looks bad in public, it'll get ten times worse when they are alone.
Personally I cant stand those guys. They are the lowest of the low.
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I agree. Those "types" of .. well, by viture of thier sex I have to refer to them as "Men", are no more than great big wuss's in dire need of an bellybutton kicking.
I've been there and done that a couple times myself. Only backfire I ever got was the girl actually came to me saying the guy had hit her. Luckily I asked a couple questions after I had the guy in the corner and turns out he'd more or less back-handed her while SHE was putting a cigarrette out on his back (even show'd me the burn). Guess the moral of the story is... find out the facts before ya loosen those teeth lol.
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I actually rescued my piece-o-crap ex-wife from her abusive boyfriend. The guy cowered in the corner like a little girl while I moved her out of his house.
Men who beat on women usually aren't men at all.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Men who beat on women usually aren't men at all.
100% accurate and true.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
I actually rescued my piece-o-crap ex-wife from her abusive boyfriend. The guy cowered in the corner like a little girl while I moved her out of his house.
Men who beat on women usually aren't men at all.
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Easier said than done Hortlund. A friend of mine who happens to be an instructor in Taekwando (no idea how to spell it, obviously) tried to stop a bloke hitting a woman in the street. While he was 'restraining' the guy, she took off her stilleto and started trying to aerate his head.
The response of women in domestic violence is very bizarre. An ex-girlfriend runs a women's support group - many of the members have been victims of this type of violence. They'll very often go back to the bloke even if he's tried to put her in intensive care. She says the situation follows a cycle of violence, reconcilliation, tension and violence again; one of the biggest factors is the woman's fear of being alone if she has children.
The stigma of the single mother has alot to answer for.
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People like that make me fantasize of dental surgery. On them of course. Grrrr. :mad:
The sad part is that many women in that situation either dont have a way out of such relationships or are too afraid to try to get out. Even worse, if you get involved and kick that buttwipe's teeth off, you'll be in legal trouble real quick (yes, cowards that hit women prefer lawyers to deal with those that kick THEIR asses). :(
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Yeah, I know. There are aspects of this that I will never understand. For some reason some women seems to be drawn to abusive guys. Some will refuse to leave the guy even though odds are he will eventually kill them. Its really weird. I dont know how many girls I've seen who have been beat up really bad, and then when they are on the witness stand, they claim it was their own fault. *shakes head*
Worst I've seen was a girl who almost got beat to death. The guy banged her head against a concrete wall so bad her skull broke (bad english). He then proceeded to kick four of her ribs in when she was on the floor. That punctured one of her lungs. She managed to crawl out the door, and the neighbours called the police. She spent something like 4 weeks in the hospital after that. When it was time for the trial, she was denying everything "It was all my fault, I provoked him and I hit him first, he only tried to push me away and I stumbled and fell into a table". Luckily the cops had her on video (The police here always brings a video camera when they are called to a domestic violence situation <--smart) so the guy got convicted. But I dont understand why she would do what she did. I just dont understand.
(Oh, and the reason he beat her up so bad? She went to a photographer and had her picture taken. She wanted to give him a picture of herself as a present. For some reason the guy saw that picture as the ultimate proof that she was cheating on him)
I wanted to kill that guy.
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Women kill more children then men do in the US. And I'm talking homicide not infanticide.
I highly recommend you read, "When she was bad", by Patricia Pearson.
Women are just as violent as men and just as agressive.
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dude...
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Originally posted by Thrawn
Women kill more children then men do in the US. And I'm talking homicide not infanticide.
I highly recommend you read, "When she was bad", by Patricia Pearson.
Women are just as violent as men and just as agressive.
I don't think men being more inherently violent was a point of contention in this thread.
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It's definately not a gender thing.
It's not even a human thing.
People of both genders will abuse pretty much anyone or anything they think they can get away with.
Whether it's the child not wanting to leave abusive parents...the woman not wanting to leave the abusive man, or the pet who is chained up in the back yard....doesn't matter.
DmdKanth
Originally posted by Thrawn
Women kill more children then men do in the US. And I'm talking homicide not infanticide.
I highly recommend you read, "When she was bad", by Patricia Pearson.
Women are just as violent as men and just as agressive.
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Gents,
Best not to take in active part in thumping the jerk. Use the freaking phone and call the Police. Those are the type of calls that cops respond to in pairs, for a reason. You often find the "lil woman" all over your back as you start to take the "meal ticket" out of the house. If they are leaving, get the license number and report that as the address can be found through a fast check with DMV.
Do NOT get actively involved unless an actuall serious assault is taking place. You will likely end up with an assault charge levied against you by the problem starter for your trouble. If he is thumping on her then peel him off and "restrain" him, using ONLY that force that was necessary to do so. Any more and you will be an assualt suspect as well. Make sure the Police are on the way and try to have multiple witnesses to cover your backside. Be prepared to follow through and go to court to testify as to what the idiot did. You may be the ONLY prosecuting witness as the wife will usually wimp out.
Quite often these are lose lose situations as prosecution by the wife happens very seldom. Frustrating in the extreme. Been there many MANY times on the job. :mad:
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Originally posted by Nifty
I don't think men being more inherently violent was a point of contention in this thread.
Didn't see any posts about anyone kicking the crap out of a woman for hitting a man.;)
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I feel pity for the woman, since i see it as her own fault. She can leave anytime she wants, but doesent. Well, take the beating then, i aint going to resolve their marriage problems. Unless they pay for it..Its like going to boxing ring with Mike Tyson and still staying there after the bell has rang. Either youre getting big bucks or are just plain stupid. :o
Ofcourse a lifethreatening situation would be different, atleast i would call the cops, since i wouldnt risk my own life for some strangers.
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Originally posted by Tuomio
I feel pity for the woman, since i see it as her own fault. She can leave anytime she wants, but doesent.
Yeah, ya might want to read up on battered woman syndrome.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
Yeah, ya might want to read up on battered woman syndrome.
Was it Maslow's theory that had the "Pyramid"? Anyway, Psych 101 will teach you (Tuomio) why women stay in such predicaments. The same can apply to men and have...such as in the form of torture to extract information during war.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
Was it Maslow's theory that had the "Pyramid"?
Yeah, "Hierarchy of needs" I'm not sure how applicable it might be to this one, but the theory might read like this: Since man (or in this case woman) must satisfy the most basic features of survival such as food and water, shelter ect, these features will superceede all other factors of ones existance. Only when the survival needs have been aquired can a person move on to the next level (not sure what it is been a while) which might include "the need to not get the crap beat out of you by some love muffin in a NASCAR tank-top with a miller lite (just kidding guys, relax).
Just a guess based on my super limited experience with Maslow.
-Sikboy
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"Higherarchy of Needs":)
Take a dog, stick in a cage. Everytime the dog tries to leave the cage, sap it with a cattle prod. Pretty soon the dog loses all motivation to leave the cage.
The part of battered woman syndrome I don't buy, is when they flip out and kill the husband. If the they were so unmotivated and completely controlled by this guy how could they go and stab him in the chest 20 times or what have you. I think cases like this are justifable homocide (al a Judy Sturm) as opposed to temporary insanity (al a Francine Hughes).
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Two women go out one weekend without
their husbands. As they came back,
right before dawn, both of them drunk,
they felt the urge to pee. They noticed
the only place to stop was a cemetery.
Scared and drunk, they stopped and
decided to go there anyway.
The first one did not have anything to
clean herself with, so she took off her
panties and used them to clean herself
and discarded them.
The second not finding anything either,
thought "I'm not getting rid of my
panties..." so she used the ribbon of a
flower wreath to clean herself.
The morning after, the two husbands were
talking to each other on the phone, and
one says to the other: " We have to be
on the look-out, it seems that these two
were up to no good last night, being as
how my wife came home without her
panties...".
The other one responded: "You're lucky,
mine came home with a card stuck to her
bellybutton that read, "We will never forget you."
DmdKanth
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Spouse abuse is an awful thing, especially where kids are involved.
I have compassion for people, but when I have to deal with these cases, I usually despise both parties. (There are exceptions.) Reasoning just doesn't work with these people. They need psychotherapy.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
I actually rescued my piece-o-crap ex-wife from her abusive boyfriend. The guy cowered in the corner like a little girl while I moved her out of his house.
Men who beat on women usually aren't men at all.
Been there too, mt.
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A dear freind of mine was stabbed to death a few years ago as he tried to intervene in a domestic dispute.
Be careful as you weigh your options under such circumstances, you may just bite off more than you can chew.
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Heh, my nextdoor neighbor used to seriously slap his beeatch around. When she tried to flee, he'd rip her off her bike and throw her up against my windows and then beat on her.
Well, he did that once.
One of my neighbor is an old druggie, working to rehab himself. Another one is an ex con just out of jail, having spent the last 8 years in there (he's 28).
Was fun. Between the tree of us, we taught that SOB a lesson.
Sure, cowardly of us to be 3v1. Then again, I feel little pity for those who initiate violence against weaker beings. Ours was a mere response :D
And he hasn't hurt anyone as far as I or my dear neighbors can tell since.
I say a good bellybutton whoopin' is what some of these SPOILED brats need. He lived highly on people's 'respect of privacy' 'let them sort it out themselves' attitude - until he got caught.
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Originally posted by StSanta
Another one is an ex con just out of jail, having spent the last 8 years in there (he's 28).
Whooo. You live in Denmark right? If that guy was sentenced to 8 years in prison when he was 28 he must have murdered someone, either that or a *serious* drug offence (like trying to smuggle in 2 kg of cocain or something)...right?
Got me curious, thats all :)
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It's a bad situation all around. Dude I knew got shot when the guy he was with interviened in a public domestic dispute. Also another similar situation, the chick became angry at the dude who stopped her boyfriend and took her dickhead boyfriends side when the cops showed up. I find that happens a lot . I've also seen chicks go from one abusive relationship to another. Sad .
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Ignorant folks always seem to be getting into trouble. Ignorant women don't seem to want to leave abusive relationships. People with borderline personality disorders are very often attracted to sociopaths.
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Originally posted by fdiron
Ignorant women don't seem to want to leave abusive relationships. People with borderline personality disorders are very often attracted to sociopaths.
Fdiron, its not that women are ignorant. Read up on Maslow's "Hierarchy of needs", then you'll understand how even you could be a victim if given the right circumstances. Its not about ignorance.
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Congrats Santa :)
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I don't think I've known a guy that slapped his woman around. I've never even heard the rumor of anyone I know doing that. Brings me to the story of a relative of mine, he's about 5 years younger than me, we kinda grew up together, partying and dating girls together, etc. He was big time popular at his school and at the age of 12 was dating a 16 yr. old cheerleader (he looked and acted a lot older than he was). He was in love with her. They dated off and on through school, when he graduated they made plans to get married. My wife and I went on dates with them and things didn't seem right. His GF was good looking, etc, came from a good family but seemed immature. It was confirmed on a couple of different occasions. One time us four went to her parents home to watch movies, she was upset about something. Anyway, they dissapeared into the back of the house, and we heard them arguing and it got louder and louder til she was screaming. We went back there, looked in the room, he was on his knees, being calm, and she grabbed a 5lb (or so) dumbell and hit him in the head with it. He fell out. I rushed in the room to see if he was ok, and she starts psycho yelling at ME :confused:. I lost my cool and told the Fing squeak to get the F away from me and he tells me he's "OK don't worry about it".
I left that night sick in my gut at the crap he was going through. He was too young for that crap and had no parents (mom and dad were partiers and were both dead by the time he was 18)
They ended up getting married and she abused the piss outa him. I had to bail him outa jail one day for "hitting" her. What really happened was she destroyed some things that belonged to his now deceased mother and he pushed her away. So she called the cops and had him thrown in the can. I never saw one mark on her, I know that she was clearly the agressor. They're divorced now with 2 sweet little girls being raised by their nutcase mom.
The story I tell above is more common than some of you guys want to believe. Thereare as many evil spiteful women as men. It's just more chivalrous of us to think we're saving some innocent dame than it is to try to save a friend from a crazy woman. Most men would be too ashamed to call the police when their woman goes nuts on them. My friend in this story was.
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Just to be clear, guys who beat their wives/GF's are losers and oughta be punished.
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Originally posted by hblair
Most men would be too ashamed to call the police when their woman goes nuts on them. My friend in this story was.
Same applies for women!
As I pointed out to Fdiron, it can happen to anyone. Its very easy to mind manipulate by the threat of removing a few bottom bricks of Maslow's "Hierarchy of needs" pyramid if you are the abuser.
http://www.connect.net/georgen/maslow.htm
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Yeah HBlair, I hear what yer saying. But when you see a nice looking girl getting pulled off a bike, thrown into a brick wall and then hit in the face with a fist, then you get pissed off.
I'm a very peaceful guy. Sure, I had lots of trouble in my teens, but I think that *made* me the very peaceful guy I am today. Even so, when I see toejame like that, I react. I'm also a skinny guy, so that takes people by surprise.
Hortlund: he's been in jail since he was 18. And he's been OUT of jail for a grand total of 2 years ever since. He hasn't murdered anyone as far as I know - it's just armed robberies, bank robberies, grand theft auto and whatnot. He told me that he averages 2-3 months out before he gets another 1-3 year sentence, but he's been out for 4 month now, looking good :D
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Originally posted by StSanta
Hortlund: he's been in jail since he was 18. And he's been OUT of jail for a grand total of 2 years ever since. He hasn't murdered anyone as far as I know - it's just armed robberies, bank robberies, grand theft auto and whatnot. He told me that he averages 2-3 months out before he gets another 1-3 year sentence, but he's been out for 4 month now, looking good :D
LOL oh man that is really sad. Once they have gotten into a pattern like that it is almost impossible to break out of. Usually it takes the tender love of a very special woman. I hope he makes it though.
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Rip, I guess it depends on where your individual brick of "not getting your bellybutton kicked" is in that hierarchy. Mine is down there with the food, water, oxygen and constant body temperature. I guess what you're saying is that the people who stay in that abusive relationship/situation have that brick up in the second level. Or maybe it's because I know that no one person can take away my basic needs. I can provide those on my own, and in the case that I couldn't, one of my parents or friends would. I can understand what you're saying though. If someone felt like they wouldn't be able to meet the basic needs if they left the situation, then they might stay in that situation. To them, leaving would be worse than staying, i.e. death instead of pain.
(yes, I know there are EXTREME situations where my basic needs could be threatened, e.g. being kidnapped.)
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Originally posted by Nifty
I can understand what you're saying though. If someone felt like they wouldn't be able to meet the basic needs if they left the situation, then they might stay in that situation. To them, leaving would be worse than staying, i.e. death instead of pain.
Yep, basic brain washing 101. Used first on POW's.
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These are for the US.
Approx. 50% of domestic abuse is initiated mutually.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the male.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the female.
This is assuming heterosexual relationship.
Straus/Gelles survey, 1985
There is the almost the exact same amount of domestic abuse in homosexual relationships as in heterosexual relationships.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
These are for the US.
Approx. 50% of domestic abuse is initiated mutually.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the male.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the female.
This is assuming heterosexual relationship.
Straus/Gelles survey, 1985
There is the almost the exact same amount of domestic abuse in homosexual relationships as in heterosexual relationships.
Yep, and I've had women slap me on the face...though I've NEVER retalitated. Any man that feels that he must retalitate short of holding the arm to prevent another slap is a popsicle in my book...Want a fight? come here, and leave the girl alone.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
Yep, and I've had women slap me on the face...though I've NEVER retalitated. Any man that feels that he must retalitate short of holding the arm to prevent another slap is a popsicle in my book...Want a fight? come here, and leave the girl alone.
Unfortunately it's this attitude that's partially responsible for so many men being in abusive relationships.
Women have the same will to power as men. They don't just slap. They can punch, stab, shoot. Women who abuse do the same level as damage as a man, break bones, blacken eyes, etc.
See "Violent Marriages: Gender Differences in Levels of Current Violence and Past Abuse," Journal of Family Violence 10:2 (1995), 159-175.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
These are for the US.
Approx. 50% of domestic abuse is initiated mutually.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the male.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the female.
This is assuming heterosexual relationship.
Straus/Gelles survey, 1985
There is the almost the exact same amount of domestic abuse in homosexual relationships as in heterosexual relationships.
wtf are you trying to say with those numbers? That 25%-75% of the women who get beaten by their husbands have themselves to blame? Is that what you are aiming at here?
I dont know about the rest of you guys, but there is nothing short of having her pull a knife on me that would make me hit a girl.
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Short answer: They with the wrong person if they getting beaten.
-SW
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Originally posted by Hortlund
wtf are you trying to say with those numbers? That 25%-75% of the women who get beaten by their husbands have themselves to blame? Is that what you are aiming at here?
I dont know about the rest of you guys, but there is nothing short of having her pull a knife on me that would make me hit a girl.
No. That's not what I'm saying at all.
I'm saying that 25% of violence in domestic fights, in American homes is started by the woman. ie. The woman throws the first punch.
Another 25% of the violence is started by the man.
The remaining 50% is of the violence is started by both parties,
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So in 50% of the cases, both spouses try to throw the first punch?
I dunno, those statistics sound weird. Be that as it may, I think they only show a very small part of the picture. The interesting statistics would be how many women/men are killed in domestic violence. How many are injured in domestic violence, etc.
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In terms of damage done, this study found theat levels of medical care, days off work, and time spent bedridden were not significantly different between the sexes (162-163)
See "Violent Marriages: Gender Differences in Levels of Current Violence and Past Abuse," Journal of Family Violence 10:2 (1995), 159-175
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That is weird. Here in Sweden, statistically, a women is beaten to death every week by her husband. And, again statistically, once every third year a man is killed by his wife.
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Yeah HBlair, I hear what yer saying. But when you see a nice looking girl getting pulled off a bike, thrown into a brick wall and then hit in the face with a fist, then you get pissed off.
I guess if she was ugly then you wouldn't be quite as pissed off.
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Originally posted by Hortlund
That is weird. Here in Sweden, statistically, a women is beaten to death every week by her husband. And, again statistically, once every third year a man is killed by his wife.
Of course it's wierd. It goes against everything the second wave feminists have been trying to say since the 70's. And what western society thinks of as manly.
I don't have the stats on man/woman domestic murder. Just parent/child.
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Thrawn, I see these people at work not every day, but often enough. I have yet to see a case where a women has beaten up her husband. I have seen plenty of cases where men have beaten the crap out of their women. That is no feminist propaganda, that is a fact.
You know as well as I do that you can prove almost anyting using statistics. Now, to me, the statistics you presented are somewhat weird in the sence that they are talking about who initiates domestic violence. That is irrelevant. It would appear to me that they have asked the wrong questions. The question should not be "why did you hit your wife, what started the fight" the only question should be "did you hit your wife". There is no justification, no excuses, no sympathy and no understanding. Hitting a woman, wife or girlfriend is always wrong. Always. No matter who said what, no matter who did what (as I said, short of the woman attacking the man with a knife).
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Also, those statistics are probably based on police and/or hospital records. And not all cases of domestic violence is reported (to put it mildly)
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Thrawns a wife beater, trying to justify it.
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In the initial survey in 1980 asked just that question. Do you hit your husband/wife? Do you severely injure them etc.
The survay found that there was an almost equal number of mem and women responded yes to sever abuse. And 12% of men said yes to minor, but recurring abuse and 11.6% of women said yes to the same.
Well the feminists went apeshit. "Yeah, but who initializes the violence?", they asked.
Hence the second survey in 1985. Which proved that both sexes did equally.
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So Thrawn, do you see any difference between a guy hitting a girl and a girl hitting a guy?
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Originally posted by Hortlund
Also, those statistics are probably based on police and/or hospital records. And not all cases of domestic violence is reported (to put it mildly)
No, they aren't based on police and/or hospital records. They are based on a survey of thousands of American households.
Domestic abuse of females is under reported. But domestic abuse of males is even more unreported. These guys know exactly how western society would view them...as rutabagas that can't handle their women.
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Originally posted by Hortlund
So Thrawn, do you see any difference between a guy hitting a girl and a girl hitting a guy?
No, I see it as violence.
I hope a personal attack isn't coming now.
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No need for a personal attack, your words pretty much speak for themselves.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
No, I see it as violence.
I hope a personal attack isn't coming now.
No, I already gave you one for both of us :D
Resume your beatings.
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I was hoping Rip was wrong though...
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I actually had a female pull a kitchen knive on me was, I could have provoked her further, I simple turned and walked out (your peripherial vision becomes very keen when a weapon is displayed, thats where they got the term "Eyes in the back of your head")
I had the perfect opportunity to do whatever I needed to do physically, but since I'm a pretty powerful guy compared to a petite woman, it would have been no match. Walking away was the best thing.
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Sweet, ad hominem!!!
I take you concede my points then.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
I actually had a female pull a kitchen knive on me was, I could have provoked her further, I simple turned and walked out (your peripherial vision becomes very keen when a weapon is displayed, thats where they got the term "Eyes in the back of your head")
I had the perfect opportunity to do whatever I needed to do physically, but since I'm a pretty powerful guy compared to a petite woman, it would have been no match. Walking away was the best thing.
Great idea, assuming you have the emotional and psycological wherewithal to walk away.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
Sweet, ad hominem!!!
I take you concede my points then.
?? What points?
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Originally posted by Hortlund
?? What points?
Uhh..you might want to read the thread again.
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LOL no way.
Just answer me this: Were you talking to me or rip when you wrote "I take you concede my points then. "
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I don't see why you should label Thrawn a wife beater for posting statistics. He seemed to pointing out that domestic violence happens to both sexes and that abusive relationships can be a two-way phenomenon. I've indirect experience of the latter and can accept the former occurs.
I'm trying to find the part where he even implied it was justifiable to hit a woman (or anybody else for that matter)... nope... can't find it. Must be the usual O-club chest-beating bollocks.
Carry on...
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Originally posted by Hortlund
I was hoping Rip was wrong though...
So now you think he is right, and that I'm a wife beater. Hence, you have both personally attacked me instead of arguing against the points I have made. Rip, I pretty sure you were kidding.
You know what, say for the sake arguement that I am a wife beater. That would in no way invalidate the statistical evidence I have given in this thread.
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WHAT statistical evidence?
This?
Approx. 50% of domestic abuse is initiated mutually.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the male.
Approx. 25% of domestic abuse is initiated by the female.
This is assuming heterosexual relationship.
Straus/Gelles survey, 1985
What exactly are you trying to prove with those figures?
And what the he** does "mutually initiated domestic abuse" mean?
As for the "So now you think he is right, and that I'm a wife beater. Hence, you have both personally attacked me instead of arguing against the points I have made. "
Actually, all I said was that I was hoping rip was wrong, from that you drew all kinds of conclusions.
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Only a punk wife beater would think that ad hominem isn't a valid form of debate !
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Originally posted by Samm
Only a punk wife beater would think that ad hominem isn't a valid form of debate !
]
heheh.
Hortland, I hope I'm wrong in thinking that you are really, REALLY, thick.
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What exactly are you trying to prove with those figures?
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another thing to ponder on...
Men:
would you fall in love and marry a woman that you know can beat the crap out of you?
And for the ladies:
Would to fall in love and marry a man that you know can beat the crap out of you?
Then answer :
Men:
would you fall in love and marry a woman that you know you can beat the crap out of?
Ladies:
Would to fall in love and marry a man that you know you can beat the crap out of?
Please answer the above in Y/N and give a SHORT reason why.
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Originally posted by Hortlund
What exactly are you trying to prove with those figures?
Despite current societal perceptions, American women are responsible for as much domestic violence (between adult couples) as men are.
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Originally posted by Thrawn
Despite current societal perceptions, American women are responsible for as much domestic violence (between adult couples) as men are.
They might initiate it, but I can assure you that due to their size and strength, if violence erupts, I'm sure there are stats that would show that out of, say 20 "beatings", 1 was a man and 19 were women.
It matters not who starts what. A guy should never strike a women unless in a case of self defense when his life is threatened. End of story.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
A guy should never strike a women unless in a case of self defense when his life is threatened. End of story.
when is it ok for a woman to strike a man?
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Originally posted by Nifty
when is it ok for a woman to strike a man?
Its not okay..but someone twice the size or strength should not retaliate...walk away. You know you could easily kick the crap out of them, why bother? You'll just have a cell for the evening, and in this state, you lose any Concealed Weapons permit that you may carry, or hope to carry someday.
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This discussion is getting absurd. How many of you have kids? How many have been hit by your kids? How many hit back?
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exactly rip. Two wrongs don't make a right to use the cliche. The fact that a woman started it does not justify the retaliation, and the fact that there was retaliation does not negate the fact that the woman committed battery in the first place.
I don't think Thrawn has ever made the point that retaliation in domestic violence is acceptable. If anything he's making the point that I'm making. Hitting your spouse (hell, or hitting anyone else) is wrong, regardless of the sex or circumstances (barring the other spouse threatening a/your life and you have no other course of action, such as fleeing).
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
Its not okay..but someone twice the size or strength should not retaliate...walk away. You know you could easily kick the crap out of them, why bother? You'll just have a cell for the evening, and in this state, you lose any Concealed Weapons permit that you may carry, or hope to carry someday.
Let me try this again.
In terms of damage done, this study found theat levels of medical care, days off work, and time spent bedridden were not significantly different between the sexes (162-163)
See "Violent Marriages: Gender Differences in Levels of Current Violence and Past Abuse," Journal of Family Violence 10:2 (1995), 159-175.
Rip the man is not nesscessarily the larger of the couple. He may also not have the same will do be violent as the women.
And Nifty is bang on about my feelings regarding domestic violence.
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Originally posted by Hortlund
This discussion is getting absurd. How many of you have kids? How many have been hit by your kids? How many hit back?
Why is it absub? I thought we were discussing domestic spousal abuse. Are you setting kids up as a straw man?
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edit.
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Originally posted by Maverick
Gents,
Been there many MANY times on the job. :mad:
Sounds like a brother in blue with sound advice. ! from Australia
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Well, I am 6'1, 190 lbs., run 3 miles every morning and stay in shape. My wife is 5'6 125 lbs., and if we got in a fistfight my superior jab and footwork could counteract her body attack and dirty tatics. Of course I'm 8 years older, so if she's patient she could wear me down, work me into a corner and punish me.
In all seriousness, Maverick is right. We lose more cops in the line of duty answering domestic violence complaints than to any other type of call. Personally I could care less if two idiots want to stay married while they beat each others' heads in once a week, but the sad fact is that domestic violence is a learned behavior, and their kids end up growing up thinking this is how you solve marital disputes with your spouse.
It's unfortunate we don't have the budget for social programs that might remove kids from homes after x-number of police visits for domestic violence disputes, but what can we do? Sterilize people?
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Arizona has a program called Child Protective Service. The do yank kids from homes where there has bee abuse of the kids. Pretty tough to sever parental rights (rightly so) but it is a step to help out.
scspook. Yep old blue suiter, retired. If you also are on the thin blue line, remember goal one is to go home at the end of the shift.