Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: poppysead on July 20, 2002, 05:06:05 AM
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You've heard intresting story's, you've read unintresting one's.
Heres a story that stabs at the tender white underbelly of the bullet catcher's. Thats right, no actual ability here, just luck and a never ending supply of aircraft to throw away. Here's a tip for us that do our best to fly into every bullet you spit at us. you know you suck when:..........
1. You fly a hurricane because "it looks cool."
2. You begin to become an expert at opening the parachute just before you hit the ground, so as to get to tower faster.
3. You've spun into the ground for the 8th straight time in a p-51 cause your first instinct when you hear the stall buzzer is to "pull harder."
4. You run out of gas, and ditch, only to find you've accidentaly switched tanks. ( 4 times total for me)
5. You 'auto' climb and take the oppertunity to go take a doodoo, and whilst sitting on the toilet you hear in a far off room the unmistakeable sound of bullets hitting airframe.( doubly stupid if you race into the computer room without wipeing)
6. You get shot down by me.
7. Your mom walks into the room and ask's you why your naked in front of the computer.
8. You drop troops over an airfield because "thats how it worked in warbirds!"
9. You've climbed for 20 minutes a P-51, you dive into attack, and right before you start easing the stick back to come up on the baddy, you notice the speedometer reads 650, therbye rendering you a lawndart.
10. The first thing you do upon reaching 200 perks is jump in a 262 and go find bad guy's, only to find yourself back in a tower within 7 minutes.
addition's welcame, cant make me feel stupid, my flying does that allready.
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Originally posted by poppysead
8. You drop troops over an airfield because "thats how it worked in warbirds!"
Untill recently that is how it worked in AH also . It took me months to figure out why everyone was so obsessed with bombing the towns .
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Originally posted by poppysead
2. You begin to become an expert at opening the parachute just before you hit the ground, so as to get to tower faster.
I have turned this into a fine art.
Originally posted by poppysead
5. You 'auto' climb and take the oppertunity to go take a doodoo, and whilst sitting on the toilet you hear in a far off room the unmistakeable sound of bullets hitting airframe.( doubly stupid if you race into the computer room without wipeing)
or:
11. Your wife, who has been conspicuously quiet during your twenty minute climb, suddenly decides that she is hungry/thirsty just as you approach your destination. Because she has been home all day looking after the children, and your role when you get home is to wait on her hand and foot, you jump up and run to the kitchen to get her what she wants...on your way back in with her refreshment you hear the unmistakeable sound of bullets hitting your airframe. You give her a long stare which is answered by a smile, then a shrug followed by her saying "It's only a game".
Of course this may just be me. :)
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10B. The first thing you do upon reaching 200 perks is jump in a 262 and go find bad guy's.
You approach a much lower and lonely Yak exiting the fight low on fuel, and proceed to taunt him on channel one how your coming to get him.
You proceed to make 12 seperate gun passes on him, missing him each time, all the time complaining on channel one that he won't hold still for you ;)
In frustration you actually enter a rolling scissors with him. Ruh roh... you lose, and your in front of him. The Yak's engine dies from lack of fuel... but the 262 pulls up into a slow vertical loop giving the Yak the opportunity, to strafe the 262 nose to tail just as his plane stalls out and begins a long slow glide to the ground deadstick.
Boom goes the 262! And sitting in the tower, seething with frustration and anger, broadcast on channel one "I was just tarding it for fun".
Oh wait.... I was the Yak, I have no idea what he was thinking :D
Sorry I couldn't resist, that was the most fun yesterday than I've had in AH in a year.
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Hehe! :D
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12: after flying a goon for 1/2 an hour you near the nme airfeild ( which is CAPed and being vulched ), hear someone ask for a goon, proceed to type a reply only to hear a repetitive 'GERONIMO!' and realize you didn't press /
(btw, whats wrong with the hurricanes?)
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Sorry, Curval, I'm much better at last minute cute opening than you. You're a mere amature to my seasoned professional.
:D
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145. Make your first landing in a TOD, call the wife in to let her know what a great pilot you have become, then smack the little hut on the rearm pad as you move to take off.
145b. Try not to smack the wife in a similar manner as she laughs.
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Upping a spit ( a V not a IX) because I was sick of dieing in the furballs in my normal plane choices.
Only to auger twice and get caught napping once LOL :D
Logged after that as nothing was going write for me last night :(
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LMFAO midnight Target, thats gotta dent your pride :D
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Take off in a 190A-8 to go buff hunting only to end up in a furball on the deck and die as soon as your E matches that of the other participants. Then up again in a Spit V to rejoin the furball only to find yourself engaging three formations of B-17's approaching your airfield.
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16: you whine about fairness after coming off second best in a HO
couldn't resist :D