Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Udie on January 05, 2003, 11:41:37 PM
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Never thought I would type the following.....
I just got back from 30 days of drug rehab. :) That xanax thing kicked me in the bellybutton harder than anything ever has! I've learned so much in the past month it's scarey. Main thing I learned was that I was on one of the most addictive substances on the planet and xanax has arguably the most dificult and dangerous withdrawals of any drug out there. The primary withdrawals (which included the seizure) lasted for just over a week. That was the hardest week I've ever lived through! Suicide was always on my mind and that's why I checked into the rehab, I thought I was insane for good. The "other" thing the doctor didn't tell me was that xanax has 2 sets of withdrawals. So about a week after I got through the first set I went into "secondary" withdrawal which wasn't quite as seveer and lasted only about 4 days, but it still sucked.
Been sober for 30 days now (I didn't think that was possible for me) and I have never felt better! :D Hopefully I won't make an bellybutton out of myself here anymore. I've learned how to control my anger more than I ever thought possible for me. The only bummer is that I've had to move in with my mom for the next 3 or 4 months to save money to get my own place. But at least I'm alive and not crazy anymore :D The depression is gone too :) Been dealing with that for about 5 years now and I can't tell you guys how good it feels to feel good.
I just want to say that I'm sorry for all the crazy toejam I wrote here the 2 or 3 months before I hit bottom. I don't know when I'll be back in the arena, but hopefully around the 15th of the month I'll be able to afford it :) I'll try and type more about what I learned last month tomorrow, if I have time.
later!
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Getting sober is painful...but worth it in the long run.
You can still be mean to me if ya want to. :p
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wondered how you were doing bro. Glad to hear things are going well. Hppy was asking about you. Are you still in Austin or back in Houston? I got divorced and now live in Pensacola. I just got off paxil (presently sueing them). What a nightmare drug that is. I was on paxil and xanax, gotta love doctors. Lost my job, family and dog. Doing great now, other then running out of savings and work environment sucks here.
But hey, lotsa AH time and hit the museum every week.
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Congrats on getting off drugs. Time to move on to something like Vodka... (j/k). :)
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Wow Udie, WTG.
Make sure you get some kind of continuing recovery program going, because at some point it will be hard to stay sober again.
I understand that when people have depression plus an addiction, you have to treat the addiction before you can even begin to deal with the depression. So sounds like you are on the right track.
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MrFish, :D
Dnil,
Sorry to hear about your divorce, but I'm glad things are going better! Good luck on your case, I'm calling my lawyer today ;)
Funked,
Man they gave me so much after care stuff its scarey! But I'm a "friend of Bill W." now so I'm looking forward to it. I'll be REAL busy for the next 2 months with this stuff. Then probably just 1 AA meeting a night after that. It does feel good not to be depressed any more :)
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Welcome back Udie! Glad you beat it...do what Funked says. (Thumbs up)
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There is a "pink cloud" that is common with the first 30, 60 or up too 2 years of getting sober. It doesn't hurt to know this and be prepared for reality kicking in.
lazs
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Glad you are good and seemingly stable. Xanax is scary toejam, you have no idea how many people take it lightly! (edit: doh, obviously you have an idea if you went thru rehab, what I meant is how many people take it as if it were a light drug like booze and dont realize how dangerous it is)
Seems like you went thru hell there and were strong enough to come out sane, I'm sorry if I gave you toejam before, but I didnt want to be just another enabler person that aproved your behavior during those not-so-reasonable times.
And remember (I'm gonna seem like Rip for saying this) get in shape and stay in shape. always do your excersice and drink lots of water. It really does help.
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Congrats Udie. Glad to see you've made it through to the 'other' side. I have to agree with Animal on this one...it's another step in the right direction and can help a hell of a lot!
Just so ya' know.. when ya' do get back in the arena...
DON'T SHOOT ME
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That's good news, Udie. Good luck.
What's xanax anyway - sounds medicinal, but animal made it sound like a recreational drug?
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wtg sir!
exercise and eat right - today is the first day of the rest of your life!
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UDIE!
Hey man, was wondering what you have been up to.
Great to hear your news. Your account is still active, come back and fly.
See ya up,
Curval
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Originally posted by Dowding (Work)
That's good news, Udie. Good luck.
What's xanax anyway - sounds medicinal, but animal made it sound like a recreational drug?
Its a powerful anti-anxiety prescription pill (relaxant)
Like it happens with most drugs of that nature, some tards always manage to come by them and use them for "fun"
Not the case with Udie, he was actually put on it by a psychiatrist.
One of the reasons I *ALWAYS* warn about trigger happy psychiatrists :rolleyes:
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Originally posted by Animal
Its a powerful anti-anxiety prescription pill (relaxant)
Like it happens with most drugs of that nature, some tards always manage to come by them and use them for "fun"
Not the case with Udie, he was actually put on it by a psychiatrist.
One of the reasons I *ALWAYS* warn about trigger happy psychiatrists :rolleyes:
I sometimes (extremely spaced) buy herbs that seem to do the trick. Kava nice and doesn't knock you out. Technically its not an herb, but the root of a bush found in the south pacific. Doesn't taste too great, but really relaxes me.
Another herb, Valerian, really kicks my ass. I take a few of them and helps me saw logs faster than a 2x4 to the head. It tastes like feet (worse actually) but gets the job done.
I dont like prescription drugs, (cept Vicodin.. after surgery, oh yeah) and I dont like antibiotics. George Carlin's spiel sums up my opinion on antibiotics :).
Anyhoo, nice to have ya back Udie
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Good to hear, Udie :) one day at a time....
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Welcome back Udie. My recommendation for happiness: Steak, and lots of it!
SOB
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Originally posted by SOB
Welcome back Udie. My recommendation for happiness: Steak, and lots of it!
SOB
The guy just recovered and you are already offering him your tubular man steak :rolleyes:
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WTG Udie, I was curious bout how you were doing.... Uh...do you think you could send me your left over dope? I 'm not in rehab:)
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Originally posted by Udie
MrFish, :D
hey what'd i do?
glad you are all better, i was just thinking about you the other day. i saw a guy with a pink feather boa riding a skateboard and singing like liza manelli and then i thought- nahhhh udie couldn't have made it all the way out here ;)
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lol Airhead
but you soon may be!!! :]
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Oct...Udie knows all about herb..;)
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Originally posted by Udie
Funked,
Man they gave me so much after care stuff its scarey! But I'm a "friend of Bill W." now so I'm looking forward to it. I'll be REAL busy for the next 2 months with this stuff. Then probably just 1 AA meeting a night after that. It does feel good not to be depressed any more :)
That sounds really great Udie. Sounds like you got hooked up with the right people. :)
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glad to hear you're doing better.
Get a wife and a kid and you won't have a time to be depressed ever again :D
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Originally posted by Curval
Oct...Udie knows all about herb..;)
lol i KNEW someone would mention that :p
THIS (http://www.erowid.org/plants/kava/kava.shtml) herb is the one i meant :)
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Good for you!!
E-mail me and I'll give you my new number if you want to talk. Moving out of your former place was wise. You really need to get a new set of friends with a life change like this.
Been there UDIE, let me know if you need a listener.
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excellent!! Am pleased to hear this news.
Be well
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WTG Udie and Welcome Back!
There'll be ups and downs as folks have said. Just remember that's how life really is.. take it in stride.
Good luck!
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What is wrong with PAXIL and why are you sueing the company? Just wanna know I was on it for a few months, thought I needed a anti-depressant, but figured out it was my physco girlfriend at the time that was wiggin me out. Other than the first few days of not taking it (friggin felt trippy, light headed, like i was in a daze) I feel fine.