Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: nopoop on February 18, 2003, 10:07:04 PM

Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: nopoop on February 18, 2003, 10:07:04 PM: I've been attempting to be a "God" going on 6 years in this flightsim thingy..

Done my time training, even for awhile practicing offline to hone my skills into a "God" of flightsims..

Sorta the baddest mothr in the valley kinda thing..

As time went on, I let the practice slip...the trainers told me things I already knew..

And I settled in to just shootin stuff..

Shootin stuff is a blast, nothin better..

But in striving for "God" like status, shootin stuff falls waaaay short of the mark..

The fear of death is nonexistant...

But with the cooperation of my lovely lady, the fear of death has be brought back into the equation..

When I die she hits me with a baseball bat..

Four sorties tonight I have 2 kills, a broken jaw and 3 broken ribs..

I'll keep you posted..
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Tarmac on February 18, 2003, 11:40:51 PM: SMACK!

:D
Title: Re: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Blue Mako on February 18, 2003, 11:51:17 PM: Sounds like a pretty good motivator. My wife just resorts to psychological torment instead, just as effective and a lot cheaper than the hospital bills.

Addendum: Shooting down nopoop will now be much more satisfying...
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: bizket on February 19, 2003, 01:54:20 AM: I dont know if thats a very good idea poopie. By this time tomorrow night you'll be in a coma or worse dead, then I wont be able to read your daily thoughts on life in the flight sim world:D
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: T0J0 on February 19, 2003, 07:29:57 AM: Wonder how you explain that on the insurance form... Wife beat me with a bat cause I didn't land my 4 kills...
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: 214thCavalier on February 19, 2003, 01:59:09 PM: Lol don't hold your breath expecting any further replies from nopoop :)
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: muckmaw on February 19, 2003, 02:49:24 PM: Imagine for a moment, the joy you will feel when you nail Nopoop, and know that somewhere, he's getting the bejesus kicked out of him.

Almost makes me want to switch to Bish.

Nothing personal, NP. Just the thought of Virtual killing leading to real life pain is enticing.
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Skuzzy on February 19, 2003, 03:08:07 PM: ROFL! nopoop!
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: dracon on February 21, 2003, 08:52:19 PM: Now this!!! Is FUNNY!!

Can I have your joystick after you get "gangbanged" over A-46?? :)

Note to Self: Don't drink beer in front of the monitor while reading Poopies comments!

LMAO,

Dracon
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: captain1ma on February 06, 2008, 11:47:38 AM: this has got to be one of the funniest things ive ever read. i have tears streaming down my cheeks. great story!!!
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: bswin03 on February 06, 2008, 12:15:40 PM: may i suggest tanking?..can't get shot down in a tank

btw......bizz has the best signiture ever!
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: waystin2 on February 06, 2008, 12:29:17 PM: Just laughing! That is all I can do nopoop! Laugh! Tears rolling down and expensive coffee out the nose...:rofl :rofl
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: RTHolmes on February 06, 2008, 12:44:55 PM: :rofl

I'd look like roadkill by now and the tour's only 5 days old :(
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: The Fugitive on February 06, 2008, 12:51:44 PM: another blast from the past...... what this one 5 years old :rolleyes:
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: IronDog on February 06, 2008, 01:33:57 PM: I've been with my wife so long,and she has lost most of her fighting skills,that I think I can take her if I get the first punch in.If she pounded me for every dumb thing I did in AH,I'd been beaten to death long ago!Now she resorts to mental methods to attack me.She knows when I'm in a furball,and will give the off the computer now,I need you for something command.Sometimes I think the mind games are worse than a beating.
IronDog
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: mars01 on February 06, 2008, 02:18:43 PM: And here I thought you were going to say, "Left the BKs" LOLH
Title: Re: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Balsy on February 06, 2008, 03:23:17 PM: Quote
Originally posted by nopoop
I've been attempting to be a "God" going on 6 years in this flightsim thingy..

Done my time training, even for awhile practicing offline to hone my skills into a "God" of flightsims..

Sorta the baddest mothr in the valley kinda thing..

As time went on, I let the practice slip...the trainers told me things I already knew..

And I settled in to just shootin stuff..

Shootin stuff is a blast, nothin better..

But in striving for "God" like status, shootin stuff falls waaaay short of the mark..

The fear of death is nonexistant...

But with the cooperation of my lovely lady, the fear of death has be brought back into the equation..

When I die she hits me with a baseball bat..

Four sorties tonight I have 2 kills, a broken jaw and 3 broken ribs..

I'll keep you posted..

Finally a way for you AND your spouse to get enjoyment out of AH. The "Flak" Bat.... at a store near you.

Balsy
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: nopoop on February 06, 2008, 07:57:43 PM: Wow that was strange seeing that old story posted back up. It was in three parts.

I give all the credit to Nor Cal wheel chair dank. It's great for writing but tends to make typing difficult..
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: rabbidrabbit on February 06, 2008, 08:05:56 PM: Maybe if she targets other areas she might help clear up that digestive issue. I thought my wife ack was rough...
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: ColKLink on February 06, 2008, 08:24:13 PM: LMFAO!! I hurled a mouthful of coke a cola at he screen that time !!! lol, thank you sir, that was a funny soab!:lol
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: daddog on February 06, 2008, 08:53:10 PM: :rofl
That was good! Gave me my best laugh all week. :D

My best to ya bud. :)
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: nopoop on February 07, 2008, 02:56:00 AM: For the new guys here's the rest of the story.

..improve my skills..Part 2

My husband wanted me to drop you guys this note to say he's doing fine.

This morning he had his jaw wired and they gave him a rib belt to ease the pain.

This afternoon as he insisted, and I got him set up at the computer to fly.

It went well, he flew a few and I heard him say "Geez zis is gret !!"

He flew the afternoon and killed four..

Unfortunatly he has been admitted to Mt.Zion with multiple leg fractures, a severe concussion and a ruptured spleen..

He gives you all the best..

____________
Mrs. nopoop
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: nopoop on February 07, 2008, 02:57:17 AM: ..improve my skills..Part 3

Thanks for your cards and letters, the BK wreath was awsome..

I was released today..

Met a celebrity while I was in !! Sally Struthers was being wheeled down the hall when I came out of surgery. She weighs 572 pounds now, but is as perky as ever..

But with the buildings construction, a gurney and Sally couldn’t occupy the same hallway at the same time so I missed out on a autograph..

That and the fact that she had a mouth full of glazed donuts..

I said “Hi Sally” but all she could manage was a mumble while trying to keep a mouthfull from falling out on her gown..

She does have some interesting tattoo’s though..

When I got home they brought in a hospital bed with the frames and all the pulleys, have it all set up in the den. Got that triangle thingy with one of those Jack in the Box smilely face balls stuck on it to help me move around..

They unloaded me from an ambulance. I was hopin they’d do the lights and siren like they did when I got picked up cuz that was cool..

Code three is a BLAST !!

Did bring a few things home that are neat. First, I no longer have to drink my cheap beers in a can, I have a tube that feeds them in AND, a bag that collects them when they leave.

I LIKE IT !!

I should have set somthin up like that along time ago..

Second, who can argue with a morphine drip ??

It’s gotta little button on it that says “more”

BRAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!

I did have to convert to a “twisty” stick cuz of my leg..but I’m rarin to go..

Cya’s up tonight !!

My lady has been sooo supportive God love her, she can’t wait for me to fly…
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: nopoop on February 07, 2008, 02:58:47 AM: ..improve my skills..Part 5..Closure

I’M SET UP DUDES !!!

I’m ready to go. The nurse guy came in and set my traction up, got my morphine drip setup on one side, my cheap beer bag hung up on the other..

I might add I “think” it was a guy, visual impressions of the individuals gender were kinda hazy..

Moniter at the end of the bed, with my twisty and keyboard in my lap..

My lady set up the speakers on either side of the bed, subwoofer below. She also left the sliding door open..

For two reasons..

One, it’s one beautiful night, a crystal clear moonlit evening..

The other..

Morphine gives me gas..

So needless to say I had the den to myself, except for the family cat Dougless. Dougless is an old tabby and he’s a porker..

He’d taken up residence on the bookcase since my homecoming after finding the “big dude” laying around in his turf.

He just did his “cat” thing by doing that crouch they do with eyes half closed for hours and hours on end. Dougless isn’t into the “moving” thing..

I wasn’t SURE it was the cat thing, it might have been the gas..

But I digress..

For my first flight back I decided that I would fly recon..

Timid I admit, but the flights over the last few days had made a big impression on me..

..and I wanted to “ease” my way back in..

So picking the approriate part of the map, I grabbed a Pony, cranked up the speakers and took off. Climbed to my cruise altitude..

..of twenty nine thousand feet..

Hehe, this ain’t cheese on top of my neck..

“Duh” isn’t tattoo’d on my forehead..

We’re gonna do this smart.

I'm getting back in to it now, doing lazy rolls, becoming “one” with my aircraft once again..

..and I see a dot at my 10, low..

it’s a con..

..a 109

Jeezzz it’s gotta be a G10

Ok, I got the altitude, if I fly smart, he’s mine, can’t mess around though..

In I go..

I’m closing..

Just about the time a moth seeing the light of the moniter got confused and thought it was the sun..

And landed in the geographical “center” of my moniter..

..as my lady came in and said “Hows it going honey ??”

“Fine dear” I said as I began to see my life in the “BIG PICTURE”..

I HELD THE TRIGGER DOWN PUTTING EVERY OUNCE OF LEAD INTO THAT MOTH..

And he flitted around and landed on my Jack in the Box smiley face on the triangle thingy…

…as the G10 minus a wing did lazy spirals towards earth..

BRUAHAHAHAHAHAA !!!!

The relief that flooded through my body at that moment in time cannot be conveyed..

I hit “auto” and sunk back in to my pillow to bask in the totality of it..

And hit the “more” button..

Baptism of fire, and I’d stepped up..

Coming in on final, a peace came over me that is unexpainable..

I dropped the gear, the flaps were full as I began my flare..

When out of the corner of my eye I glimpsed Dougless as he awoke from his slumber..

..and launched all 16 pounds of pork at the Jack in the Box triangle thingy..

..falling miserably short, hitting my twisty stick cord..

..unplugging it from the computer...

to the sound of footsteps coming near..
__________________
nopoop
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Corrs on February 07, 2008, 12:30:18 PM: :lol :lol :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :cry :rofl
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: oboe on February 07, 2008, 12:49:30 PM: :lol

It is so great to hear from you again, nopoop!
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: Dragon on February 07, 2008, 01:08:22 PM: Just too Funny:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: captain1ma on February 07, 2008, 01:39:13 PM: OMG Please stop!!!!! my monitor is covered in starbucks frappuccino, there are tears streaming down my cheeks, ive wet my pants and my boss wants to fire me!!!............................. ..

Just TOOOO FUNNNNYYYYY!!!!

Great Story:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Re: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: CAP1 on February 07, 2008, 06:11:56 PM: Quote
Originally posted by nopoop
I've been attempting to be a "God" going on 6 years in this flightsim thingy..

Done my time training, even for awhile practicing offline to hone my skills into a "God" of flightsims..

Sorta the baddest mothr in the valley kinda thing..

As time went on, I let the practice slip...the trainers told me things I already knew..

And I settled in to just shootin stuff..

Shootin stuff is a blast, nothin better..

But in striving for "God" like status, shootin stuff falls waaaay short of the mark..

The fear of death is nonexistant...

But with the cooperation of my lovely lady, the fear of death has be brought back into the equation..

When I die she hits me with a baseball bat..

Four sorties tonight I have 2 kills, a broken jaw and 3 broken ribs..

I'll keep you posted..

OUCH!!
Title: Finally found out a way to improve my skills..
Post by: doc1kelley on February 09, 2008, 09:36:15 AM: Quote
Originally posted by bswin03
may i suggest tanking?..can't get shot down in a tank

btw......bizz has the best signiture ever!

NOT TRUE! I remember shooting down flying Flakpanzers and flying PT boats in AH on nights that the AH Con was in session. Never ever say you can't do something in AH. Hitech will prove you wrong!

All the Best...
Jay
awDoc1