Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: RightF00T on June 09, 2003, 11:52:44 PM
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An Accident Report:
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the
newsletter of the
Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a
true story.
Dear Sir
I am writing in response to your request for additional information
in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the
cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I
trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my
work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later
were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. Rather than carry
the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a
pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth
floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the
barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied
the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh
135 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I
lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless
to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the
vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now
proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained
the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as
listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping
until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the
pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind
and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to
experience pain. At approximately the same time, however, the
barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the
barrel.
Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed
approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can
imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In
the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This
accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into
the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of
mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty
barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two
broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
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Just cant be real... :D
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http://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/bricks.htm
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thanks for a remind of a great old joke. when I first read it (ran off on a 'ditto' machine. does that date me?) it was tittled 'Lost Pressence Of Mind"
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Good one!