Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: funkedup on July 02, 2003, 07:33:37 PM
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America should be a bad-ass cowboy and gun down anyone who gets in our way!
I'm madder than Roy Rogers with a busted guitar at all these filthy foreigners whining about how Americans are a bunch of "cowboys."
These yahoos think we're the bad guys and that the real problem in the world today is "American imperialism" -- not that nutcase Saddam having enough anthrax and nerve gas to wipe out the human race 10 times over.
Well, folks, I say it's high time for Uncle Sam to proudly tell the world he is a cowboy. A bad-ass cowboy who's not afraid to shoot first and ask questions afterward is exactly what the world needs right now to get rid of tough hombres like Saddam and all those murdering terrorist thugs.
Let's come right out and say there's a new sheriff in town, buckaroos.
And I'm not talking about a squeaky-clean lawman like the Lone Ranger who used to shoot the guns out of bad guys' hands with a silver bullet.
I mean a modern-day Clint Eastwood-type cowboy who growls, "Make my day" before pumping six shots into some creep's back.
Or remember Walking Tall, where that tough sheriff Buford Pusser kept moonshine-making hillbillies in line with his trusty 2 by 4?
Well, Uncle Sam oughta do the same thing -- only instead of whacking heads with a big stick, clobber sense into them with a nuclear missile.
I mean it, gang. From now on, any of these fool countries step out of line, we shove the biggest nuke in our arsenal right up its old wazoo.
It's no more Mr. Nice Guy. Nice guys finish last -- just ask Jimmy Carter.
So let's cut out this malarky about begging the U.N. on our hands and knees like some Third World dump before going to war.
Next time, just bomb the hell out of the turkeys and get it over with.
We're the most powerful nation on Earth and we ought to act like it, by jiminy. I say, let's shove peace down the throats of these foreign rascals -- no matter how many people we have to kill to do it.
When Ancient Rome was the baddest dude on the block, there was peace in Europe for hundreds of years. And the emperors didn't maintain order by wimpy "nation building." Why, if a country like Carthage acted up, they'd defeat it, raze every building to the ground -- then sow salt into the soil. The rest of the world got the picture mighty quick and fell right into line.
As the world's sheriff, two things we ought to do right off the bat is make English the universal language and institute a single currency -- the almighty dollar. That silly Euro is the goofiest idea they ever came up with.
Once we have the whole Earth speaking one language everyone can understand, united under America's thumb, we'll finally have world peace.
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I stole it from here (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/anger.cfm?instanceid=57445).
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Aww hell I thought it was funny. :)
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>It's no more Mr. Nice Guy. Nice guys finish last -- just ask Jimmy Carter.
Jimmy Carter ended up wining the Nobel prize.
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Quote:
"Jimmy Carter ended up wining the Nobel prize."
So did Yasser Arafat. What's your point???
Carter is still a dork and was a dismal failure as a President. But he's nice to children and pets....
Cabby
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Originally posted by Cabby44
Quote:
Carter is still a dork and was a dismal failure as a President. But he's nice to children and pets....
Cabby
Lets see....
Carter - Graduate from USNA Nuclear Engineering
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Successful businessman and farmer
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Successful Governor
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Elected President
Cabby- ????????????
Carter - Renouned Humanitarian
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Dork?
Cabby - ???????????????????????????
:cool:
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You hate him cause he's "in your face" with the truth that you're just too blind to see, Tahgut! :)
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I hate no one....
Sorry you missed the point of my post. Maybe you need to take that California High School exit exam.
:p
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Originally posted by MrCoffee
>It's no more Mr. Nice Guy. Nice guys finish last -- just ask Jimmy Carter.
Jimmy Carter ended up wining the Nobel prize.
What a joke.
After selling the North Koreans Nuke plants to build weapons.
Thanks Jimmy, don't do me any more favors.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Lets see....
Carter - Graduate from USNA Nuclear Engineering
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Successful businessman and farmer
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Successful Governor
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Elected President
Cabby- ????????????
Carter - Renouned Humanitarian
Cabby - ??????????
Carter - Dork?
Cabby - ???????????????????????????
:cool:
Very good come back !!!
Don't ya just love logic.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
I hate no one....
Sorry you missed the point of my post. Maybe you need to take that California High School exit exam.
:p
It's "renowned" not "renouned".
:D
I got past California high school before the exit exam. :)
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Jimmy Carter is under appreciated:
The Camp David Accords (http://www.jimmycarterlibrary.org/documents/campdavid/index.phtml) September 1978.
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Originally posted by Sandman_SBM
It's "renowned" not "renouned".
:D
I got past California high school before the exit exam. :)
Aaaaaaaahhhggg...
(I deserved that)
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Should have added... the "point" of your post was funny. :)
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Jimmy Carter is under appreciated:
So is Nixon (http://www.gmu.edu/library/specialcollections/nixon_in_china.html)[/b] for that matter (China)
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Originally posted by midnight Target
I hate no one....
Sorry you missed the point of my post. Maybe you need to take that California High School exit exam.
:p
No , you ASSUMED I missed it. And you know how to spell assume ;)
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"America should be a bad-ass cowboy and gun down anyone who gets in our way! .."
I hear an old story still told in some parts that America was so mean it once nuked a country just for snoring!
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Originally posted by WestyAH
"America should be a bad-ass cowboy and gun down anyone who gets in our way! .."
I hear an old story still told in some parts that America was so mean it once nuked a country just for snoring!
Welcome back westy !
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no.. "it was just to watch them die"....
yep, time to stop all the PC crap and tell it like it is.
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Originally posted by funkedup
Once we have the whole Earth speaking one language everyone can understand, united under America's thumb, we'll finally have world peace.
Won't that be expensive?
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This seemed like the right time and thread for this one. I got from a "squaddie" of mine. You might have seen it before but.........
Subject: Peace plan
It could work! Gotta love Robin Williams!
Robin Williams' Peace Plan
Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan...
what we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.
I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of
a plan for peace.
So, here's one plan:
1) The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in
their affairs, past & present. We will promise never to "interfere"
again.
2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting
with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No more sneaking through holes in
the fence.
3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together
and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the
remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.
4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 day visits unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself, don't hide here. Asylum would not ever be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers.
5) No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If
they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home, baby.
6) The US will make a strong effort to become self sufficient
energy wise. This will include developing non polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.
7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a
barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else.
8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the
world, we will not "interfere". They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them gets "lost" or is taken by their army. The people who need it most get very little, anyway.
9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an island some place. We don't
need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, it would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.
9b) Use the buildings as replacement for the twin towers.
10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way,
no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer.
Now, ain't that a winner of a plan.
"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'"
- Robin Williams
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I think Skuzzy will say somthing like this
"No point to this thread, other than to create anger and beg attention. Trollers are not welcome here"
I just wanted to get in a-fore he do.
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As the world's sheriff, two things we ought to do right off the bat is make English the universal language and institute a single currency -- the almighty dollar. That silly Euro is the goofiest idea they ever came up with.
No kidding... a union of independent states using the same currency... what lunacy!
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Originally posted by Scootter
I think Skuzzy will say somthing like this
"No point to this thread, other than to create anger and beg attention. Trollers are not welcome here"
I just wanted to get in a-fore he do.
I guess it's an inside joke. What I posted was a column by Ed Anger, which is a pseudonym for a female writer who writes satires of angry old man columns for a joke-tabloid called the Weekly World News. It's supposed to be funny, not create anger etc.
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Originally posted by Cabby44
Quote:
Carter is still a dork and was a dismal failure as a President. But he's nice to children and pets....
Cabby
Carter killed a small rabbit who was innocently swimming in a pond. Jimmy claimed it was self defence.
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Originally posted by Sandman_SBM
It's "renowned" not "renouned".
:D
I got past California high school before the exit exam. :)
Yes, but shouldnt it really be reknowned now. Just guessing.
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Originally posted by Sandman_SBM
No kidding... a union of independent states using the same currency... what lunacy!
Too hip for the room.
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Your Text, Dialectized (redneck)
South Car'lina sh'd be a bad-ass cowfella an' gun down ennyone who gits in our way! Fry mah hide! ah's madder than Roy Rogers wif a bested git-fiddle at all these filthy fo'eigners whinin' about how South Car'linans is a bunch of "cowfellas." These yahoos reckon we is th' bad guys an' thet th' real problem in th' wo'ld today is "South Car'linan imperialism" -- not thet nutcase Saddam havin' inough anthrax an' nerve gas t'wipe out th' hoomin race 10 times on over. Wal, folks, ah say it's high time fo' Uncle Zephaniah to proudly tell th' wo'ld he is a cowfella. A bad-ass cowfella who's not afraid t'shoot fust an' ax quesshuns af'erward is exackly whut th' wo'ld needs right now t'git rid of tough hombres like Saddam an' all them murderin' terro'ist thugs. Less come right out an' say thar's a noo sheriff in town, buckaroos. An' ah's not talkin' about a squeaky-clean lawman like th' Lone Ranger who used t'shoot th' guns outta bad guys' han's wif a silvah bullet. ah mean a modern-day Clint Eastwood-type cowfella who growls, "Make mah day" befo'e pumpin' six shots into some creep's back. Shet mah mouth! Or remember Walkin' Tall, whar thet tough sheriff Bufo'd Pusser kepp moonshine-makin' hillbillies in line wif his tresty 2 by 4? Wal, Uncle Zephaniah oughta does th' same thin' -- only instead of whackin' haids wif a trimenjus stick, clobber sense into them wif a nucular missile. ah mean it, gang, acco'din' t' th' code o' th' heells! Fum now on, enny of these fool countries step outta line, we shove th' mos' trimenjus nuke in our arsenal right up its old wazoo. It's no mo'e Mr. Nice Guy. Nice guys finish last -- jest ax Jimmah Carter. So less lop out this hyar malarky about beggin' th' U.N. on our han's an' knees like some Third Wo'ld dump befo'e a-gonna war. Next time, jest bomb th' hell outta th' possums an' git it on over wif. We is the dawgoned-est pow'ful nashun on Earth an' we ought t'ack like it, by jiminy. ah say, less shove peace down th' throats of these fo'eign rascals -- no matter how menny varmints we hafta kill t'do it. When Ancient Rome was th' baddess dude on th' block, thar was peace in Europe fo' hundreds of years. An' th' empero's didn't maintain o'der by wimpy "nashun buildin'." Whuffo', effluff'n a country like Carthage acked up, they'd defeat it, raze ev'ry buildin' t'th' groun' -- then sow salt into th' soil, ah reckon. Th' ress of th' wo'ld got th' pitcher mighty quick an' fell right into line. As th' wo'ld's sheriff, two thin's we ought t'do right off th' bat is make English th' unyversal language an' insteetoote a sin'le currency -- th' almighty dollar. Thet silly Euro is th' goofiess idea they evah came up wif. Once we haf th' whole Earth speakin' one language ev'ryone kin unnerstan', united unner South Car'lina's thoomb, we'll finally haf wo'ld peace.
Dialectizer (http://rinkworks.com/dialect/dialectt.cgi) (Thanks Arlo)
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Your Text, Dialectized (redneck)
South Car'lina sh'd be a bad-ass cowfella an' gun down ennyone who gits in our way! Fry mah hide! ah's madder than Roy Rogers wif a bested git-fiddle at all these filthy fo'eigners whinin' about how South Car'linans is a bunch of "cowfellas." These yahoos reckon we is th' bad guys an' thet th' real problem in th' wo'ld today is "South Car'linan imperialism" -- not thet nutcase Saddam havin' inough anthrax an' nerve gas t'wipe out th' hoomin race 10 times on over. Wal, folks, ah say it's high time fo' Uncle Zephaniah to proudly tell th' wo'ld he is a cowfella. A bad-ass cowfella who's not afraid t'shoot fust an' ax quesshuns af'erward is exackly whut th' wo'ld needs right now t'git rid of tough hombres like Saddam an' all them murderin' terro'ist thugs. Less come right out an' say thar's a noo sheriff in town, buckaroos. An' ah's not talkin' about a squeaky-clean lawman like th' Lone Ranger who used t'shoot th' guns outta bad guys' han's wif a silvah bullet. ah mean a modern-day Clint Eastwood-type cowfella who growls, "Make mah day" befo'e pumpin' six shots into some creep's back. Shet mah mouth! Or remember Walkin' Tall, whar thet tough sheriff Bufo'd Pusser kepp moonshine-makin' hillbillies in line wif his tresty 2 by 4? Wal, Uncle Zephaniah oughta does th' same thin' -- only instead of whackin' haids wif a trimenjus stick, clobber sense into them wif a nucular missile. ah mean it, gang, acco'din' t' th' code o' th' heells! Fum now on, enny of these fool countries step outta line, we shove th' mos' trimenjus nuke in our arsenal right up its old wazoo. It's no mo'e Mr. Nice Guy. Nice guys finish last -- jest ax Jimmah Carter. So less lop out this hyar malarky about beggin' th' U.N. on our han's an' knees like some Third Wo'ld dump befo'e a-gonna war. Next time, jest bomb th' hell outta th' possums an' git it on over wif. We is the dawgoned-est pow'ful nashun on Earth an' we ought t'ack like it, by jiminy. ah say, less shove peace down th' throats of these fo'eign rascals -- no matter how menny varmints we hafta kill t'do it. When Ancient Rome was th' baddess dude on th' block, thar was peace in Europe fo' hundreds of years. An' th' empero's didn't maintain o'der by wimpy "nashun buildin'." Whuffo', effluff'n a country like Carthage acked up, they'd defeat it, raze ev'ry buildin' t'th' groun' -- then sow salt into th' soil, ah reckon. Th' ress of th' wo'ld got th' pitcher mighty quick an' fell right into line. As th' wo'ld's sheriff, two thin's we ought t'do right off th' bat is make English th' unyversal language an' insteetoote a sin'le currency -- th' almighty dollar. Thet silly Euro is th' goofiess idea they evah came up wif. Once we haf th' whole Earth speakin' one language ev'ryone kin unnerstan', united unner South Car'lina's thoomb, we'll finally haf wo'ld peace.
Dialectizer (http://rinkworks.com/dialect/dialectt.cgi) (Thanks Arlo)
Why in tarnation did you pick SC. We shorely don't talk lik at. Dern Californ I A idjit.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Too hip for the room.
LOL... :D
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n0 |
Now hes so hip hes practically pimpin.
:D
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Excellent Quotes mike..i wish we could...
then the borodas-weezles-beetles blitzs of the world would sit in there on feces,,,,god i would love to let them all rot in hell
love
BiGB
xo xo
USA .......USA.......USA..
dam i m luky i was born here....now i can take advantage of these good fortunes...
p.s. jimmycarter is a fool peace prize??lmfaaaooo
ya middle east looks good..Arafat??UN and the nobel guys are complete feces bags
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wow bgbmaw, they do not get much dumber then you do they?
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fINGER:p