Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: StSanta on July 26, 2003, 06:27:04 AM

Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: StSanta on July 26, 2003, 06:27:04 AM
A pal of mine is getting married soon, so naturally lots of jokes about 'you're about to only get laid once a month'.

Statistically it is true that married couples have less sex per month than does unmarried couples. It's also quite logical that attraction or novelty wears off after some time. Time itself usually has an effect on physical appearance and might also be a factor. Then there's having kids. For one it takes up lots of time an energy, leaving at least one of the spouses tired. There's also some talk about biological changes either due to aging or having children.

And of course the 'am married now. She/he cannot just walk away so I'm less likely to lose him/her' argument.

Personally I'd marry only for legal reasons but that's another matter. I've seen some documentary on Discovery where they asserted that they had stats showing decrease in sex after marriage. They dinnae compare it to unmarried couples who'd been together the same time so to me it's inconclusive.

So you married chaps; shred some light on this issue? My pal is scared enough of the marriage thing as it is. It'd be great to ahve some stats either way; either to scare him more (which would be fun) or to alleviate some of his fear (which would be the morally correct thing to do, but oh so boring).
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: _Schadenfreude_ on July 26, 2003, 07:09:26 AM
Tell your friend to start a family as soon as possible - then not having sex will be the least of his problems.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Eagler on July 26, 2003, 07:16:22 AM
marriage didn't slow us down - mother nature and children did
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Eagler on July 26, 2003, 07:17:56 AM
then again StSanta - how many times ARE you going to give it to him :)

congrats - when's the big day :)
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: GrimCO on July 26, 2003, 08:39:31 AM
Marriage hasn't slowed us down in the least. We have no children yet, and I'm quite sure that has something to do with it.
With kids, you have to be more discreet about it. I foresee the demise of romping around the house naked and doing it on the couch, etc... when the kids come along.

Other than that, we lived together for four years before marriage, and have been married for four years. So far, no change in the sex life.  :)
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: StSanta on July 26, 2003, 09:50:39 AM
Eagler, heh, big day for him not for me, fortunately :).

Three weeks from now.

I hope he knows what he's doing. His girlfriend positively hates me and doesn't bother hiding it whenever we meet, so I haven't seen that much to my pal for the last year. But he loves her and I reckon it's just a natural thing - when someone gets a gf the first the gf does is make a list outta good vs bad friends and try to steer the poor soul away from the 'bad' ones. Once married there's no steering away - the contact is cut thanks to the extra leverage of marriage.

Dunno what I did to make her so angry. Disliked me from the start, heh.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: capt. apathy on July 26, 2003, 11:22:47 AM
marriage nor kids have slowed anything down in 19 years.  

a couple very important rules (everyone I know who broke them paid with a drastic cut in sex)

1.  unless you absolutly have no other options the kids should only sleep in your room until 6-8 weeks old.  as long as you don't sleep with the tv/radio playing you will hear the kid from the next room if they wake up in the night.

2.  kids are never allowed to sleep in your bed.  actually nobody else should ever sleep in your bed (unless your into that sort of thing I guess),  you should always have at least that for just the 2 of you.

3.  kids should begin to be taught to always knock and wait for a reply before entering your room, from the moment they can move under their own power.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: hazed- on July 26, 2003, 11:32:09 AM
A guy who is paralysed from the waiste down is called a 'paraplegic' right?

so why is a woman paralysed from the waiste down called 'Married' ?



hehehe I love that old joke :)
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Gremlin on July 26, 2003, 11:48:02 AM
Quote
Originally posted by StSanta
Dunno what I did to make her so angry. Disliked me from the start, heh.


hehe, mebbe its your grossenarsch:)  How you been ya old cherrypicker?  Haven't seen you in the arenas in sooo long:)  
Come back soon buddy, i need to pad my score:D
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: SaburoS on July 26, 2003, 02:33:47 PM
Who says my sex life slowed down once I got married?

I still have sex five times a week.

Oh wait a minute, does it have to be with my wife each time?

Never mind.


:D  Just kidding
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Mark Luper on July 26, 2003, 08:25:16 PM
StSanta,
The first thing your friend needs to realize is that sex is not what holds a marriage together. It is just icing on the cake. If sex is all there is between them the marriage won't last very long.

I have been blessed with a life partner of 37 years (this comming Dec.) who first of all was my best friend. We do things together and enjoy life as it comes...together. We have always maintained the utmost respect and regard for each other and we never part without having first made sure all questions are answered.

Sex is great, but I think it is highly overrated. It should never be the foundation on which a marriage is based. Time takes it's toll on all of us and "frequency" does diminish but if the foundation of a marriage is set in the concrete of friendship, mutual respect, and admiration it will last forever.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: loser on July 26, 2003, 10:24:14 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Mark Luper
StSanta,
The first thing your friend needs to realize is that sex is not what holds a marriage together. It is just icing on the cake. If sex is all there is between them the marriage won't last very long.

I have been blessed with a life partner of 37 years (this comming Dec.) who first of all was my best friend. We do things together and enjoy life as it comes...together. We have always maintained the utmost respect and regard for each other and we never part without having first made sure all questions are answered.

Sex is great, but I think it is highly overrated. It should never be the foundation on which a marriage is based. Time takes it's toll on all of us and "frequency" does diminish but if the foundation of a marriage is set in the concrete of friendship, mutual respect, and admiration it will last forever.


WTG Mark AT, in this day and age you are a part of the minority.  Plus words to live by.

Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: wklink on July 26, 2003, 10:36:40 PM
It depends on how you look at things.

You tend to lose frequency (I:E four or five times a week) but you gain consistency (I:E no long three or four month stretches between g/friends).

It all evens out in the long run I think.  I don't get 'it' as much as I did when I was dating my wife but then again, I don't have to go looking for a date either.

Everyone is right though, kids do crimp your sex life.  Nothing slows the old libido down like having a 6 year old start jumping on your bed just as you start to begin the old snuggle.

I swear, the kid is psychic sometimes.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Gixer on July 27, 2003, 03:46:47 AM
Why do you think girls always smile when they are walking up the aisle?

Because they know they have given their last blowjob! :D



...-Gixer
-Hells Angels-
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Scootter on July 27, 2003, 07:32:02 AM
Quote
Originally posted by Gixer
Why do you think girls always smile when they are walking up the aisle?

Because they know they have given their last blowjob! :D



...-Gixer
-Hells Angels-


Oh that is so untrue!!;) ;)
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: DRILL on July 27, 2003, 09:56:54 AM
Marriage and sex
 do not work well togeather .....
:rolleyes:
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: midnight Target on July 27, 2003, 09:59:23 AM
Marriage didn't affect my ex-wife's libido at all. Just ask anybody.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: threedays on July 27, 2003, 11:50:39 AM
ups ..... sex before marriadge ?

:cool:
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: StSanta on July 28, 2003, 09:26:25 AM
Gremlin wrote:
hehe, mebbe its your grossenarsch How you been ya old cherrypicker? Haven't seen you in the arenas in sooo long
Come back soon buddy, i need to pad my score


Hey Gremlin bro! Yah; no cash for new rudders/throttle due to getting driver's license and skydiving. And no job either, despite having great grades. There were *three* positions I was qualified for in the entire country last time I checked. Gotten so many rejections my job hunting is starting to look like my women -hunting :D.

Other than that I'm doing ok (unemployment does wicked things to your mind bro). How you doing?

Oh and btw; if you're a masochistic SOB you'll want me back as I'll spank you to within an inch of your life - and then a little more. For score-padding (or 'padding fetish'), I suggest you look up Kirin :D

Mark Luper
I agree on your comments. However one must not downplay the emotional part of sex. Doing it just to 'get off' is one thing, but there's also a huge bonding thing if we're talking two people who love each other. If I was tog et married in three weeks I'd be worried big time about losing that intimacy. or of either my partner getting bored with me or the other way around - either way you lose intimacy. OTOH, if the partner or I am bored, there probably isn't that much going on in the first place.

FWIW, I envy you your success in marriage. I doubt I'd be able to come anywhere close to it, so I'm gonna play it safe til I get around, say, 40.

Capt. Apathy
Good rules, I'll relay them to my pal. I have this idea that it's the kids that cause the decline in most marriages, so some rules there might help 'im.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Curval on July 28, 2003, 09:36:45 AM
LOL MT....

"Sex is great, but I think it is highly overrated."  ummm....disagree.

Marriage didn't affect my sex life...but kids sure did.
Title: Marriage and sex
Post by: Ripsnort on July 28, 2003, 09:38:48 AM
Quote
Originally posted by Mark Luper
StSanta,
The first thing your friend needs to realize is that sex is not what holds a marriage together. It is just icing on the cake. If sex is all there is between them the marriage won't last very long.

I have been blessed with a life partner of 37 years (this comming Dec.) who first of all was my best friend. We do things together and enjoy life as it comes...together. We have always maintained the utmost respect and regard for each other and we never part without having first made sure all questions are answered.

Sex is great, but I think it is highly overrated. It should never be the foundation on which a marriage is based. Time takes it's toll on all of us and "frequency" does diminish but if the foundation of a marriage is set in the concrete of friendship, mutual respect, and admiration it will last forever.


Spoken like a poet!