Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Curval on July 30, 2003, 12:15:06 PM
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My wife caught my oldest after he took a lolipop from the store without paying for it this morning.
Sooooooo, at 3.00pm today I am going to march him back to the store and he is going to:
(a) Pay for it.
(b) Apologise to the general manager.
I called the store earlier and spoke to the assistant manager and explained that I wanted to pay for what he took and that I wanted the biggest meanest scariest person they had to scare the living daylights out of him. Apparently the general manager fits the bill perfectly. :)
I did the same thing when I was just a bit older than my son and my mother did to me what I am about to do to him. I never did it again.
Any other parents had to do this?
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I say turn him over to the authorities. A night in the slammer should cool him off.
MiniD
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Originally posted by Curval
My wife caught my oldest after he took a lolipop from the store without paying for it this morning.
Sooooooo, at 3.00pm today I am going to march him back to the store and he is going to:
(a) Pay for it.
(b) Apologise to the general manager.
I called the store earlier and spoke to the assistant manager and explained that I wanted to pay for what he took and that I wanted the biggest meanest scariest person they had to scare the living daylights out of him. Apparently the general manager fits the bill perfectly. :)
I did the same thing when I was just a bit older than my son and my mother did to me what I am about to do to him. I never did it again.
Any other parents had to do this?
This happened to me as a kid, and I was scarred for life. I even stole the best wife on the planet! Never even paid for her!
Seriously, my mother did something similiar with me, and I recall being very embarassed about it. But ya know, I never did shoplift again until I was a teenager. :D
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I had this Star Trek plastic gun that shot these little colored disks from it....these disks worked perfectly as slugs in gumball machines.
My mom caught me buying gum at the grocery store using these slugs....she turned me in to the store manager as well.
Good work....what a wild concept....raise your kids.:)
The Bible says, raise a child in the way they should go and when they're old, they will not depart from it.
It's worked with my four.
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Yea but Rip, your the meany making them study during Summer Vacation and won't ante up for a X-Box! :) By time they get the thing, something newer/cooler will be out hehehe
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Something somewhat similar happened to me when I was about 12.
My neighbor owned a grocery store (little shop, really) and I was always building model airplanes.
Anyway, I went into the store and asked for "Model Glue".
Apparently, the guy was a fall down drunk, and heard me ask for "Bamboo" which, I learned later, was a form of rolling paper.
I never understood why the clerk told me to get lost and he was not selling me any, when I clearly asked for Model glue.
Anyway, he called my father, who approached me when he got home.
I was asked one question: "What the F*** are you doing with that sh*t?!"
I simply replied, "huh?"
To which I was punched square in the chest.
Later, MUCH later, my father found out he was wrong, and apologized....sorta.
Bottom line, I never took a hit of pot in my life. Never used any drugs. WHy? Well, I was terrified of my father.
WTG on your parenting. Don't punch you kid in the chest, but get your point across.
It's nice to see parents being parents for a change.
(Of course, I never use drugs, but I smoke a pack of Marlboro a day and drink like a fish...2 more things I learned from dad.....Oh and about 5 years ago, I came across a bag of weed when I was cleaning out the old man's basement...friggin hypocrit!)
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IMO that's a good way to handle it Curval.
having appropriate consequences for their (kids)
actions is the best way to prepare them for the
world.. and they'll be much happier and better
adjusted.
but next time... cut off a finger
:eek:
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Although i havent got any kids, only 18, i think that is a damn good idea, wtg :)
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i did the same thing when i was 6 or 7. parents made me do the same thing, and i havnt stolen anything from anyone ever since. still remember the incident clearly.
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Originally posted by Curval
.......... and my mother did to me what I am about to do to him. I never did it again. Any other parents had to do this?
Believe it or not, but I remember my mother doing exactly the same thing over 50 years ago at a store in Detroit, where we had been visiting on a shopping trip. I still remember the experience as if it was yesterday. I was one scared young pup when I had to go back to the store with some small "silver plastic" bullets I had taken from a kid's toy gun and holster set. It's amazing how some things and emotional experiences like that get etched into one's mind.
Sure cured me from that point onward........
Nice to see someone who cares enough about their responsibilities for child rearing, to go to these lengths to teach a valuable life lesson about respecting other's property....
Regards,
Badger
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Stole a little airplane whistle when I was about 6. It kicked ass. It was a little twin engined plane, that when you blew into it, it whistled and the props spun.
When my dad saw it and realized where I'd obtained it, he did the same thing. Drove right back to the store, and Dad made me hand it back to the manager and apologize.
Never stolen anything since.
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Ah these stories...
See I never stole anything but got blamed for it once.
I was 9, there was something going on at the police junior league. My dad gave me a few coins to get a soda. When the soda came out the chute, I checked the change slot and there was 50 cents in it. Cool! So in the next machine, I bought a candybar.
Walking back to my Dad and seeing more than he had given me money for, he just yanked me aside, told me I'd swiped that from someone and before I had a chance to go "but..." I'd been slapped and we were back in the car heading home. Seems he couldn't wait to tell Mom how bad I was. So, shrug...I got grounded for the weekend for basically having a lil luck
LOL
Years later I told him about what happened and pretty much just got a silent "doh" from him.
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Caught my daughter with some stuff from a couple shops in the local mall when she was about 12.
I drove here down, and marched her inside. I then stood at the doorway to each shop, and made her tell the manager what she had done. She was ready to return the goods, and/or pay for them. She was sobbing the whole time, but I was so pissed it didn't matter.
Worked like a charm though.
She's doing great, and is gonna make me a grandpa this month.
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Originally posted by midnight Target
Caught my daughter with some stuff from a couple shops in the local mall when she was about 12.
I drove here down, and marched her inside. I then stood at the doorway to each shop, and made her tell the manager what she had done. She was ready to return the goods, and/or pay for them. She was sobbing the whole time, but I was so pissed it didn't matter.
Worked like a charm though.
She's doing great, and is gonna make me a grandpa this month.
Not at 12, right? LOL
Congrats!
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Islamic law clearly says that the punishment for theft is the amputation of a hand. Or at least that was what happens to thieves in Islamic Fundamentalist countries, not that there are many of them still around.
Hey, I don't write the religious edicts, I just interpret them based on judicial precedent!
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Curval you have the right idea. I still remember when my mom caught me grabbing some bubble gum from at the Rink's checkout when I was 5. :)
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luckly I've never had to deal with that one. (one's 18 so I figure I've made the finish line with him. 5 more years without a major problem and I figure I can start bragging).
as I see it you did just the right thing. the phone call ahead was a great idea btw, I've talked to friends who've done it without the call only to have the store guy say "it's just a piece of candy, no big deal, don't worry about it" and completely screw up the whole thing.
I love to see other parents make their kids take responsability for their actions, and wish more did. one day your kid will thank you for it.
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Oh yeah, wanted to pass along a story, for real this time.
So my wife and I went to a CART race earlier this year. The souvenir booths were being run by the Police Athletic League as part of their fundraising efforts. At the end of the race I decided to pick up a shirt or two on the way out, and apparently half the fans there decided to do that also.
As we're bustling in the crowd around the folding table yelling our orders, the boy tossing the merchandise throws me my shirt and I give the man collecting the money my cash. My wife barks her order and the boy throws her a shirt and we turn to leave.
Once we're outside the mob circle, my wife realizes that she hadn't given the cashier her money. She's thinking "Cool! A free shirt!". I look at her and tell her "Hey, its charity. We're not that hard up for money." We wade back into the mob scene and give the man our money. He looks at us and says "What size?" and my wife explains what happened.
I would've forgotten about the incident by now but my wife recently brought it back up as part of a childhood memory about her dad and his attitude about money. Seems he had instilled in them the notion that if a merchant forgets to charge for a good or a service, then its ok to keep the free item/service, the opinion being that hey, it was the merchant's fault so they should eat the cost of their mistake.
I, on the other hand, believe that its wrong to take advantage of another person's error, particularly when the money is for charity.
So fess up, have you ever used an expired coupon, or taken advantage of a mis-priced item, or any of the other little "errors" in buying something?
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Might want to take one of his favorite toys and donate it to that store. Additional lesson learned for the kid.
You take, something will be taken from you. He'll learn how it is not only from the embarrassment of apologizing, but also from losing something as well.
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Originally posted by SaburoS
Might want to take one of his favorite toys and donate it to that store. Additional lesson learned for the kid.
You take, something will be taken from you. He'll learn how it is not only from the embarrassment of apologizing, but also from losing something as well.
Too harsh. Think of the corollary: if something is taken from him and returned, he'll demand something from the thief.
Laws are intended to put the aggrieved parties back in the state in which they existed prior to the harm, not allow a party to benefit unjustly.
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Originally posted by gofaster
Too harsh. Think of the corollary: if something is taken from him and returned, he'll demand something from the thief.
Laws are intended to put the aggrieved parties back in the state in which they existed prior to the harm, not allow a party to benefit unjustly.
He'll learn the most how it feels to have something taken from him. Bet he doesn't steal again because he'll now know what a victim of theft feels like.
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I remember as a young teenager I went on a serious shoplifting binge. Me and my friends took things from stores because we could (and it was fun). Most of the stuff we kept hidden from our parents so that it wouldn't raise any questions. We even had a couple of brushes with the law but none of them stuck. Then, one day I was caught with a buddy that simply couldn't lie his way out. Then his parents found out. Then my parents found out. I've never stolen a thing since.
Moral of the story: Parents, you enjoy the responcibility of being the single most powerful influence on their children's lives. Never take that lightly and NEVER try and blame your demon child's behavior on pop music or video games.
...And every now and then, help them clean their room... just to see what they keep hidden in the closet.
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I was a bit reluctant to post about this incident, but I see that many of us here have had similar experiences....whew..:)
The manager played the part as if he was born to be a cop. He marched my son into his office in the back of the store and started off by being very scary. He didn't yell, but he was firm. My son was very very humble. He sobbed and openly cried at times.
The message got through I think. He told his mother how sorry he was afterwards and said he would never do it again...no prompting on behalf of his mum.
I told him that I was disappointed in him (the look on his face when I said that damn near broke my heart), but I also told him about my experience when I was a kid and that what happened today was all about learning. He made a mistake and I told him that he should learn from it. I think he will.
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about her dad and his attitude about money. Seems he had instilled in them the notion that if a merchant forgets to charge for a good or a service, then its ok to keep the free item/service, the opinion being that hey, it was the merchant's fault so they should eat the cost of their mistake.
wow, I'm usually not nieve but I was origanally shocked at the idea of someone teaching their kid that that form of theft is ok.
of course I imediatly realized that there are people out there not only teaching their kids that stealing is ok but some of them teaching the kids how to do it. I've just always, kinda by default, assumed that most stealing where people who's parents didn't take the time to raise.
the thing is that you wife probably didn't even realize she was stealing until it was pointed out to her
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I had this Star Trek plastic gun that shot these little colored disks from it.... - Rude
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Hey! I had one of those! Great toy to terroize the family dog and older brothers.
Chance
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Just last week my wife got change back for a $20 after paying with a $10.
She pointed out the error to the checker, and the reaction she got was incredible. You'de think she was Mother Theresa or something. The cashier went on and on about how grateful she was for my wife's honesty and how few people do what she did and ... well it was sickening.
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When I was 9 or 10 I grabbed a Penthouse, chopped it up and sold the piccies at school off individually.
I'm in IT sales now and I turned out fine :D
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cut his right hand off - he will not steal again
and if she beats him in the parking lot, make sure its outa view of the parking lot cameras :)
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Couldn't the same effect be produced by just explaining to the kids why shoplifting is wrong? Especially if the kid is over 10 years old.
I think it would work. Scaring the kid might work for a week or two, but if he knows the reasoning behind it, it would prevent it from happening again.
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My Mother did the same thing to me when I was about 5 or 6. I recall it very clearly. She tought me that 2 things were absolutely not tollerated were theft and lying. I made that same message clear to my son as well. There are other things that aren't allowed either but those two are instant hot buttons.
Curval for taking the time to love your kids enough to teach them. Far too many of todays parents jusat ignore their kids and society suffers for it.
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Curval, report him to the authorities and let Bubba in jail teach him a lesson.
A thief is a thief and he damn well learnt it from you kill stealing swindler :mad:
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Me and my mates used to do shoplifting pretty much few years ago... (im still teenager.)
My parents never found it out, but important thing is that I realized myself what i was doing and never did/will do it again. And thats something im proud of.
about her dad and his attitude about money. Seems he had instilled in them the notion that if a merchant forgets to charge for a good or a service, then its ok to keep the free item/service, the opinion being that hey, it was the merchant's fault so they should eat the cost of their mistake.
It pretty much depends how much money we're talking about. Couple times at hamburger place they brought me new meal since i just bought one, I took it and didnt feel bad, they have enough food :D
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l,ololololol
vulcan funny aasss shet
We used to jumpin the Jelly Belly Factory Dumpster in Fairfield,CA....
omg sooo much candy,,( what was it doin in garbage..we dont know..lollol)..we would bring it to school and sell it...then go buy 1.8ths of high grade humbolt.....awww junior high...
BiGB
xoxo
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Couldn't the same effect be produced by just explaining to the kids why shoplifting is wrong? Especially if the kid is over 10 years old.
I don't think so. curvals way teachs the kid not only that it's wrong but that there will be consiquences, and dad won't let you hide behind him.
just discusing it teaches him that 'stealing is wrong' is just something we talk about, without any real downside. besides that if a kid has made it to 10 and not figured out that stealing is wrong, then you are a ways beyond just a talk.
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Sweet jebus, all these 'learnt lessons', and you still pay taxes?
-SW
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Hey Curval, sounds like a good idea. Depending on the age of the child, they don't always realise the severity of what they did.
You might also consider having a Police Officer present, no only will it reinforce the severity, but you can also get a tour of a Police Station, and combine the lesson of severity with a lessons in civics.
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I remember some time ago when I was broke. Went to the liquor store and bought a couple beers and paid with a 5 - got change for a 50. I left the store, thought about it and then went back in and returned the change.
I was still broke, but felt way better about myself after that. Proud of my integrity ever since.
(Man that WAS a long time ago)
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Oh boy! i or my mom do not belong in this thread lol!!! My mom would be like "good boy" your finally growing up...
:D
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Originally posted by davidpt40
Couldn't the same effect be produced by just explaining to the kids why shoplifting is wrong? Especially if the kid is over 10 years old.
I think it would work. Scaring the kid might work for a week or two, but if he knows the reasoning behind it, it would prevent it from happening again.
shows how much you know...it wouldent work at all...especially if the kids over 10 we just tune you out sit there and nod when you start lecturing us...scare tactics work if they know what they did...it doesnt work if you just start bashing em...
never had anything like that happen to me (worst i did was get a extra 2 handfulls of candy from a broken machine) but thats just because my older sister scared the **** out of with about it nice and early...
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Originally posted by capt. apathy
the thing is that you wife probably didn't even realize she was stealing until it was pointed out to her
Yep. And she's not the only normally-good person I've found doing the same thing.
My officemate once had a coupon for $200 off a new PC that expired on December 31. On January 1, the price for the particular PC he wanted came down to a point he could afford. He went to the store to buy it and presented the expired coupon. Not only did he get the new lower regular price, but the cashier mistakenly gave him the $200 off, too. He came back to the office bragging about how great a deal he got from the scam.
All I could say was "Yeah, you got a heckuva deal, John. By the way, how are your two little girls coming along?" I don't know if he took the hint about being a role model or not, but I didn't press the matter further.
As I mentioned earlier, I would've forgotten all about the CART shirt incident if my wife hadn't recently been thinking about her parents and how messed up they were on certain things, particularly how her dad is fixated on money and keeping it any way he can and how her mom is always threatening to leave him but never does because she doesn't have any money of her own (she turns her social security over to him to manage the household finances).
Recently her dad was out at a new mall and picked up a lamp at Bombay Company on clearance because it had a damaged leg. He picked it up for 60% off regular price. A little while later he was out shopping at his usual mall and stopped in to talk to the store manager, who knows him because he's always in the mall walking around. My wife's dad mentioned that he had a lamp that was damaged and asked if the manager would let him exchange it for a new one. The manager, not knowing the lamp had been discounted because of the damage, accepted the exchange and my father-in-law got a brand new lamp.
When my mother in law related this story to my wife, she immediately saw it was a scam, but also knew that her father was proud of his "shrewd business transaction". It was this incident that prompted her to remember the CART shirt moment when I adjusted her moral compass to True North.
Is it any wonder then, that corporations are having ethics problems?
I recently read a scam whereby MCI was re-directing calls intended for rural areas where telephone service is expensive to provide. MCI was sending the calls into Canada, then re-directing them back into the US where AT&T would absorb the cost of the call as a longdistance charge. MCI was passing its business costs onto its competitor. "Shrewd business transactions" at its corporate best.
AT&T never would've known about the scam if a district attorney hadn't alerted them to it.
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I did the same thing when I was a kid, never stole anything again until I was CEO of Enron.... then I got away with it.
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When I realised my kid was doing shoplifting, I trained him to lift Pr0n for me. Afterall, he's under the legal age to get in trouble.
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I never shoplifted anything, but I remember getting caught letting the air out of my mom's friend's tires. :)