Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Ripsnort on September 22, 2003, 02:19:40 PM
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(http://graphics.jsonline.com/graphics/news/img/sep03/1catsabig091903.jpg)
{Yes, thats real feces...from cats...}
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and this is just one more reason why I'm a dog person
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Thats from Milwaukee isnt it? Saw it on the news last week. Apparently the neighbors could smell that crap 100yds away!
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Originally posted by Octavius
Thats from Milwaukee isnt it?
Naturally.....:eek: :rofl
{Minnesotan stick-poke at Wisconsinite)
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Old Milwaukee..it just doesn't get any better than this.:D
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"It wasn't the cat-**** so much that bothered Bob, but the hair played hell with his allergies"
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Originally posted by Gadfly
"It wasn't the cat-**** so much that bothered Bob, but the hair played hell with his allergies"
Thats good!
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.....the day after the Aces High Con....
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New value priced menu at the Chinese carry-out across the street.
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=817&e=2&u=/ap/cat_infestation
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After a successful Knit raid into Rook territory, they're left with the task of decontaminating the former FDB Headquarters.
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Home Sweet Home
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so who's drinking the diet pepsi, SOB?!
where's the beer and BW3 scraps?!
you lie!
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"Never a better time for Lo-Jack, next time you'll never lose your key's"
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At least they had enough class to hang paintings instead of posters.
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That's Wild Cherry Pepsi. The bone room, err the OTHER bone room is shown in a different picture. The beer cans were used to build the 8th wonder of the world in the back yard...the Egyptian pyramids are puny in comparison.
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Fluffy was constipated for weeks until Jack gave her ExLax....the explosion was heard for miles. :(
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"Lucy!! You got some splainig to do"
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On a positive note, the Beanie Babies collection was intact.
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"Fortune cookies"
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"Low-tech Almond Roca Factory"
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Hey! There is nothing funney about that! I have run calls in sh^&% holes like that and I didn't get to wear a suit like that!!!!! I'm calling OSHA. It just blows me away that people can live like that.....:eek:
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"Ben was so p!ssed having to clean up j-lo's mess he decided to play spaceman"
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Originally posted by medicboy
Hey! There is nothing funney about that! I have run calls in sh^&% holes like that and I didn't get to wear a suit like that!!!!! I'm calling OSHA. It just blows me away that people can live like that.....:eek:
You and my wife could talk! :eek:
They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.
Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
You and my wife could talk! :eek:
They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.
Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.
Aww... and that was the first time you and your wife met, how cute! :D
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
You and my wife could talk! :eek:
They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.
Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.
ROFLMAO
Largest one I had was 589lbs, took us 2hrs and 12 guys to get her out of the house. In the er the nurses were cleaning her up and found parts of a sandwitch in the folds of skin on her abdomen. The bread was moldy and looked like it had been there about a week. Second time I had to pick her up was when she sat on her toilet and it shattered, had cuts and imbedded porcilen in her prettythang. She died 2 months later (thank GOD!) I thought she was going to be the end of me. "HEadlines read: Paramedic killed after patient falls on him." Then the picture.....
You know, I should write a book, after 10 years and a few thousand calls I have some pretty good stories.
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Oh my! :eek: Hope she "held the Mayo" :rofl
Yep, sounds like this guy, he had watermelon growing between the layers of fat...body cheese mind you. I guess the smell was something ones nose never forgets!
(Your story reminds me of the cartoon of a big fat woman nailing a sign saying "LOST: small dog...{blah blah}" and the dog is wedged up her crack. :rofl
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Originally posted by medicboy
R Second time I had to pick her up was when she sat on her toilet and it shattered, had cuts and imbedded porcilen in her prettythang. She died 2 months later (thank GOD!) I thought she was going to be the end of me. "HEadlines read: Paramedic killed after patient falls on him." Then the picture.....
ROFL! i am a sick, sick man... i cant stop laughing at that. :D
my apologies :D
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Nope, you never forget the smell of "body cheese" or the smell of someone with a lower GI bleed, (digested blood comming out the south end).
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Decontamination Suit - $560
Rubber Boots - $57
Respirator - PRICELESS!
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Originally posted by medicboy
You know, I should write a book, after 10 years and a few thousand calls I have some pretty good stories.
I keep telling the wife to document the stuff, and publish it when she retires (you can't give out patient info while a nurse, but *I* can! :D)
Anyway, theres another pretty funny one about a guy that used WD-40 to prevent arthritis on his pet chickens legs, and blew himself up, but I'll save that for another day.(Wouldn't want Sling accusing me of trying to better your story! :p )
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You can't give out info like names, addresses or anything that might specificaly ID the person, but you can give out other details... I'm married to a nurse as well, but she has only been doing this for about 5 years, doesn't have as many stories as I do, and the real good ones never end up in the ER anyway. :D