"He Ain't Kinky, He's My Governor."

[rpm]

There's new hope on the horizon for Texas.

Friedman, although still formulating his full platform, has already promised to legalize casino gambling, outlaw the declawing of cats, and abolish political correctness ("it's just not the Texas way").  Quips Kinky, "The other guy has the experience.  That's why I'm running."  Though he jokes that his first order of business if elected will be to "demand a recount," there is no mistaking his seriousness in the matter.  Governor Perry seems to agree, as his office has responded rather petulantly to Kinky's early assertions that "today's politician's do not inspire people."  

Kinky has a giant agenda ahead for 2004 and 2005, as he prepares for 'The Great Ballot Initiative Of 2006,' the moment of truth, when 45,000 Texans will sign him up as an Independent candidate.  He has already been invited to appear on all the national press shows (everybody from Imus to Schieffer to Buchanan wants our lad), but he needs your Texas media support now.  You'll be joining a very interesting crowd.  Both President George W. Bush ("I'll be your one-man focus group, Kinky") and syndicated columnist, Molly Ivins, have voiced their fervent support for the Kinky's campaign.  Friedman may be the only person on the planet who can make such a claim!

VOTE KINKY!

Link to New York Times article.

[capt. apathy]

He was originally for the war in Iraq, he said, and argued with Willie Nelson about it. "He's a tyrannical bully," he told Mr. Nelson, "and we got to take him out."

"No," he says Mr. Nelson objected, "he's our president, and we got to stick by him."

In a Friedman administration, he said, Mr. Nelson would lead the Texas Rangers, unless he was called to Washington to head the Drug Enforcement Administration.

nice,  the guy is a mother-load of quote material

[rpm]

you got that right!

So what kind of governor would I be? When I was in Washington, George W. asked me what my platform was. I didn't really have an answer at the time, but I've had a chance to think it over. Next time I see him, this is what I'll say: "My platform, Mr. President, is that I'm not a politician. My platform is that I'm not a bureaucrat. My platform is that I'm a writer of fiction who speaks the truth. My platform is to fight the wussification of this great state, to rise and shine and bring back the glory of Texas. My platform is, no hill for a climber. My platform is to remember that when they went out searching for Sam Houston to try to persuade him to be the governor—and he was the greatest governor this state has ever had—rumor has it that they found him drunk, sleeping under a bridge with the Indians."

I think he's got a shot. He's smarter than Ahnold and you can understand what he says.

[capt. apathy]

you know, I don't really care what office the guy was running for.  if I could find a politician at any level of gov't who said what was on his mind directly without checking the polls or dodging questions I'd vote for him.

another great thing about this guy is his impervious to people trying to dig up crap from his past.  hell, he's proud of it and already has it on display.

I wish he was running for office up here.

[Bodhi]

So, just so you all know, I am ramping up my campaign for president in 2008.  FlxDaCat has graciously agreed to be my VP.  FYI, I had to push back the 2004 election because I am only gonna be 32, and apparently it is necessary that I be 35 to be the president....  yet one more rule I plan to get rid of.

One last thing, when I am elected president, I pledge gov't funding for AH!  That and 30 lashes for all HO dweebs!

Bodhi 2008!

[lazs2]

"My platform is to fight the wussification of this great state"

That would be a great platform for anyone running for gov of any state.   Be a real good one for presedential level  too..

stop the wussification.... end democrats and womens suffrage.

lazs