Could it be possible or acceptable that certain deviations from reality have been made to facilitate game play in this game?
Not when it comes to the flight model, or ballistics, or damage done to airplanes. Hitech has repeatedly stated that the goal is to make a game that is as realistic as possible when it comes to the flight model, the ballistics of the bullets, and the damage that bullets do to planes. It is impossible to be 100% accurate, but the goal is make the simulation as close to the real thing as can be done within the limits of the environment and the computing power available.
Acceptable deviations from reality include stuff like, refueling and re-arming in thirty seconds, and the all-seeing radar (kind of necessary to find where the fight is).
Damage to ground targets is set for game play. Damage versus aircraft is calculated as a best effort to simulate the real thing. If you think the damage model is off, present hard evidence, not just a couple of videos.