As for getting killed in a furball, or one on one. The fact is that you placed yourself in a position to be shot down. No ones fault but your own....fact of life in virtual or real world flying. So if you're shot down, don't get po'd at that guy that shot you. Get po'd at yourself for placing yourself in that position.
As for the whining etc. That is going to happen no matter in which online communtiy you happen to participate. Same with the occaisional insult. Whining or hurling insults is never warranted. Best thing to do is to consider the source of the insult or whine, and disregard them. Whining and insulting other players just displays to everyone online the level of maturity of the one whining or insulting. Again, consider the source, disregard, have fun and enjoy yourself.
Also, I flew AW a very long time and one fact is clear. The level of skill in AH is much greater enlarge then the level of skill I confronted in AW in the many years I flew there. Get used to it, get better, and have fun.
Hajo