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A software developer at Spam Associated who was found to have traces of marijuana in his urine has been sacked, citing safety concerns.
"We just cannot have these loose guns in our industry. The potential for lost lives is too great" says Spam Associated CEO RightWing Keeppersonalfreedom. "What's worse", he continues, "is that many of these drug addicts possibly are terrorists too. I'm happy that the new anti-terror laws allow us to lock up our employees for three months in solitary confinement so we can see if they develop abnormal behavior".
A spokesman for the software developer says he is not posing a risk to society and that Spam Associated has no business inquiring into the personal life of his client
"If you had to design AOL banners and put them up on a web site, sheeeiit, you'd want a big fat J when you got home, just to make the taste in your mouth go away, dude. Man, this is, like, unfair"
The software industry has lately been shaken by a series of drug related scandals. In the last three weeks, five software developers have been caught in the now mandatory 7 day "DEATH" (Drug Enforcement Anti Terrorism Humiliation) tests.
"Its good we have DEATH - the current situation must not go on" says a state representative. "There are literally millions of people dependent on stable software. These people are clearly terrorists who mindlessly endanger other human beings (and possible RepubloCrat voters)." When asked what OS he was running he answered "Windows ME" with a shrug, utterly missing the irony.
The case is going to the Supreme Court as soon as the current administration has found a way to replace "those weak bellybutton crybaby drug loving hippies currently spreading their message of anti-American behavior".