The reason that HO's are more effective than in real life, has nothing too do with dispersion or speed. Its the icons. In real life its very difficult to judge closure rate, and range, in a head on attack. But with icons its quite easy. So then it becomes an issue of marksmenship and a high speed game of chicken.
That said, it takes two to HO. If you can't figure out how to avoid an HO, and come out with a superior position, go schedule some time with a trainer and I bet that in a single evening you will have it down pat. Its quite easy to avoid HO's once you learn the technique.
Hangtime, LOL!!
Believe it or not, but back in Warbirds I did just that. I was flying a heavy P-38L when a purp 190 decided he wanted a piece of me headon. I jettison'd my eggs, and was about to get rid of my rockets, when I figured "what the hell... I'll use them to scare him to death". So as we approached D1.8 I started to salvo the rockets two at a time towards him.
My second salvo hit him right behind the cockpit !
It was great watching him flutter down to earth with his entire rear fuselage and tail missing.
And there was much crying, moaning, and gnashing of teeth on channel 1 and on private. LOL!