No cht really here's the story from yesterday:
I work for Xerox and fill in at numerous accounts when someone is on vacation, calls in sick or whatever. One of our clients is Children’s Hospital of Wisconsin. I was filling in there from Wednesday through Friday for one of the mail personnel that was on vacation. I go there regularly, and have an outstanding track record with the client. I've done a ton of “special” jobs and stuff that have not only gotten me recognition with Xerox, but with the client too (free meals, CD’s, and money to mention a few).
Sp there we are the Xerox staff right after lunch talking about dumb stuff. There are 2 other guys that work there (all Xerox) that I am pretty good buddies with. Jay and Eric. Jay goes and takes a dump every day about 45 minutes after lunch LOL. Well here we go talking about bowel movements (guys being guys I thought). Jay leaves to go to the can and I go on a mail run. While on the mail run I do some powerful “movements” in one of the bathrooms in the hospital building (BTW our room is in the office building 1 of 3-4 on the campus).
When I get back from the run I tell Jay that there was a “condition yellow” in the hospital bathroom near clinic E (the hospital has color codes for events, red for fire, black for tornado and so on). Yellow is the “bomb threat” code. I tell Jay I left either a “dirty bomb” or “chemical warhead” in the toilet. Basically I made a nasty dump LOL. Jay laughed for a minute then went back to work.
I go and tell Eric the same thing looking for another chuckle. Somehow though he missed the fact the I left a “steamer” and just heard the “code yellow”. Well I didn’t know he missed that part, and since he was a bit busy I just went back to work.
About 5-10 minutes later Eric is on the phone with someone and says across the room:
“hey Dave, where was it that the “condition yellow” was reported?”
I was mortified and Jay almost fell over laughing. Eric was on the phone with the director of material services who works in an offsite building. Seems it’s our job in the mailroom to report any “codes” to the outside building so they know what’s going on. These codes are announced over the PA of the hospital followed by a long beep to alert everyone. Since this didn’t happen (because there WAS NO BOMB THREAT) we couldn’t figure out why the **** he had made the call.
Anyway as Jay is falling over laughing I say to Eric, “what?!?! Didn’t you hear me, I was talking about a ****!” at which point he gets this very upset look on hi face and tells the director “I'm sorry David Ray was making a practical joke” and gets off the phone with him!
Now Eric is pissed for looking like a fool and the director is extremely pissed seeing as they initiated a shutdown of operations for the “bomb threat”.
Now I'm concerned. The director of material services thinks I was making a practical joke bomb threat on Children’s Hospital. Not cool. I wasn’t even CLOSE to making a threat to the hospital, unless you count the noxious fumes in the restroom on the 2nd floor.
Within a half hour I have been on the phone with the manager of the account, my manager, and numerous others explaining the situation, delicately I might add.
Here’s where I'm pissed off. Eric does not have a body. The only thing you see of him is his feet sticking out of his managers prettythang. He was such a busy-body moron he made a call to start a shutdown knowing NOTHING about the situation.
Not only that, if there really was a bomb threat you think I would just tell him in passing, casually, then just go back to my job?!?! I’d be the frikin roadrunner. All you'd see of me was a dust trail away from that building.
Well I still have a job, Children’s decided against pressing charges but I'm never allowed on campus again, and I'm on “corrective action” with Xerox (meaning if I screw up again in the next 6 months I get canned).
Eric got commended for acting swiftly on a possible hazard, and making the correct call.
WTF is wrong with these people?!?!?!?!
Warning to everyone: don’t make a joke about “dropping a bomb” in the toilet at work, you might get fired.
