Author Topic: Life on The Farm  (Read 505 times)

Offline rpm

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Life on The Farm
« on: June 06, 2006, 10:13:18 PM »
Got home from work today and decided to take a dip in the ol' jaccuzzi. I got undressed, walked out to the patio and took off the cover and started testing the water.

As I walk barefooted around to the other side so I can take the cover the rest of the way off, I glaced down to see the biggest copperhead snake I've ever seen in my life slithering less than 6 inches away from my bare foot.

I almost **** my pants (if I had been wearing any). It was over 2 1/2 feet long and huge! Probably a pregnant one. Now, I have to wonder what I've got in store for the rest of the summer. Needless to say those midnight moonlit dips I usually take are postponed for a while.
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2006, 10:17:09 PM »
Hehe, this coming from the guy who earlier posted about hating the encroaching population.

Snakes or morons, which one you prefer?  

;)
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline rpm

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« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2006, 10:21:31 PM »
That's a tough question. I hate neighbors, but snakes scare the beejeebus outa me.

What's a fear of poisonous snakes called? Oh yeah... common sense!
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline Tarmac

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« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2006, 10:23:04 PM »
Not that it's much help, but his cold-blooded arse was probably just trying to absorb some heat from your hot tub.  :)

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2006, 10:23:46 PM »
A regular Indiana Jones you are!
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline rpm

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« Reply #5 on: June 06, 2006, 10:24:35 PM »
Now that I think about it, both go hand in hand. All the new city folk moving in out here has shrunk the habitat. They are driving all the snake in my direction.

Knew I could blame this on them if I just thought it thru.
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #6 on: June 06, 2006, 10:30:55 PM »




WE'RE COMING FOR YOU RPM!!!!! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSS WE ARE COMING FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline rpm

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« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2006, 10:39:23 PM »

Say hello to my little friend!
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline Hangtime

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« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2006, 10:42:46 PM »


Gingers. Gingers are snake herders. (i saw it on the history channel)

No doubt your encroaching neighbors are Gingers.

"Save the Fringers, Shoot a Ginger!"
The price of Freedom is the willingness to do sudden battle, anywhere, any time and with utter recklessness...

...at home, or abroad.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #9 on: June 06, 2006, 10:47:02 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Hangtime
(i saw it on the history channel)


:rofl

Wonder if he'll get it...(not you RPM)
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline AWMac

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« Reply #10 on: June 06, 2006, 10:49:56 PM »
RPM if you were a lil faster in the head you could have stepped on the head, reached down and grabbed brhind the head, not the neck...you grab the neck good chance of gettin bit. Behing the head as close as you can to the jaws.
Now with Buck Knife out you cut between your thumb/forefinger and back of it's head...straight down or it'll roll and nick ya.  Kick the head away,  ifluff'n yer wearin shoes, if not get a youger cousin to pick it up..with a stick.
Ya wanna now grab this snake about midway and squeeze and pull... you should hear the bones pop in the back and see watermelon come out the back end....rinse off snake.
Gut it starting from where the head was, down the belly, just enough to break the skin and membrane of the belly... if she's preggers be careful.
stripe the guts out and rinse really good, skin the rest of it.  You could marinate it now, batter and bread it or simply get it fired up.

Gather up yer  wood,a lil starter like Gucci bags and Paris and Richie and vigoriously rub them together... soon your Wood will start up... Keep rubbing until you know your Wood is as HOT as you want it....Just when it's ready!!!!

Throw the dead snake away and take Paris and Richie to the tent!!!! Show them the YER Snake!

Gawd gotta teach the youngens everything!

:aok

Mac
« Last Edit: June 06, 2006, 11:00:25 PM by AWMac »

Offline rpm

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« Reply #11 on: June 06, 2006, 10:56:18 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by AWMac
RPM if you were a lil faster in the head you could have stepped on the head, reached down and grabbed brhind the head, not the neck...you grab the neck good chance of gettin bit. Behing the head as close as you can to the jaws.
Mac
Sorry, you lost me at step on the snake. I was buck arse nekkid. Not that it makes any difference. The only snake I want to come in contact with are size 13 D Tony Lama's.
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #12 on: June 06, 2006, 11:34:14 PM »
Oh man, that copperhead would have made a nice pair of boots.

He has a point.  You missed an opportunity, buck arsed or not.
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline RTR

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« Reply #13 on: June 07, 2006, 09:33:33 AM »
ROFL Mac  :)
The Damned

Offline ChickenHawk

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« Reply #14 on: June 07, 2006, 10:59:50 AM »
Same thing happened to me when I was a kid, though I wasn't buck naked.  Was walking in the back yard and just before my foot came down on it, I noticed a coiled copperhead ready to strike.  Needless to say I pulled my foot back, got out the hoe and chopped off it's head.

Sigh.... sometimes I miss livin in the south.
Do not attribute to malice what can be easily explained by incompetence, fear, ignorance or stupidity, because there are millions more garden variety idiots walking around in the world than there are blackhearted Machiavellis.