Author Topic: The Cleanest Joke in the World  (Read 473 times)

Offline USAFCAPcTSgt

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The Cleanest Joke in the World
« on: May 31, 2013, 06:21:51 PM »
One day a woman is walking down the street in lower Manhattan on a hot and sunny day.  An incredible thirst began to consume her.  Upon realizing the new sensation, she stopped the nearest man close to her wearing a suit, tie and hat.

"Excuse me sir, do you know where the closest place to get a drink is from here?"

The man had to think a bit.  Finally, after a minute to collect his thoughts, he replied,"Yes, I do.  Across the street, the building with the red canopy above the entrace marked LL's has a well stocked bar on the top floor."

She thanked the man and crossed the street and proceeded through the revolving doors under the red canaopy.  She found the elevator and hurried inside.  Pushing the top floor button, she waited until the elevator arrived at its destination.

When the door opened, she spotted across the vast high vaulted lobby a sign over a silvery door marked "EL".  She figured this was the bar the man on the street was referring to and made her way into the bar.

She approached the counter and sat on a barstool.  The bartender asked her what she wanted to drink.  She replied,"A cold beer will be fine."

The bartender nodded and went to fill her request.  He cam back a minute later and sat the glass down on the countertop.  She lifted the liquid to her lips and took a large swallow.  "This is the weakest beer in the whole world.  Do you have something stronger?"

The bartender indicated that beer was the only alcholol they served with an apologetic look.  She wasn't happy.

That's when the man in a long trenchcoat and hat spoke up from the ned of the counter.  "Ma'am, I have something strong for you."

The bartender spoke,"Ma'am, I wouldn't trust him."

The stranger told him,"It's a free country and she can make her own decisions."

Curious, she left her seat and walked down to the seat next to the stranger.

"This place doesn't have the best spirits in town.  I carry something with me that will lift your spirit up in a jiffy."  The stranger reached into his trenchcoat and pulled out a bottle of red liquid.  He poured the stuff into his shot glass.

Taking the shot glass with the red liquid, he upended the glass and drank the whole amount of liquid in one shot.  "Now, watch this".  He walked over to the nearest window.  He lifted the window up the and the high altitude winds blew into the bar.  He climbed out the window and stood on the ledge.  Hw took one foot forward and took a second foot forward floating in mid-air!  He then walked oround the building just outside the ledge in mid-air.  Once finished, he climbed back into the bar from the window and say back in his seat.

The woman was totally mesmerized with this astonishing feat!  She recovered from this shock and said,"I've never been to the city before and never saw anything amazing like that before.  I want a drink of that stuff too."

The stranger poured her a shot of the red liquid into a shot glass.

The bartender again warned her of not doing anything dangerous and again the stranger said it's a free country and she can make her own decisions.

The woman drank the red liquid and walked out onto the ledge.  She took one steo off and took the second step off resulting in her falling 25 stories to her death on the sidewalk below.





Wait for it...




The bartender looked at the man who had removed his trenchcoat wearing a suit, tie and hat with glowing red eyes.  The bartender said,"You know, I'm getting real sick of your practical jokes Superman."


And, the most twisted joke in the world. :devil

Offline Zacherof

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Re: The Cleanest Joke in the World
« Reply #1 on: May 31, 2013, 06:38:34 PM »
 :rofl that jokes pretty fly
 :aok
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Offline ozrocker

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Re: The Cleanest Joke in the World
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2013, 09:12:01 AM »
New Yorkers are the fastest readers in the World :aok

15 stories in 3 seconds




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Offline RedBull1

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Re: The Cleanest Joke in the World
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2013, 11:34:41 AM »
A pretty funny one I came across today :lol



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Offline jeep00

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Re: The Cleanest Joke in the World
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2013, 05:48:54 PM »
I don't get it. Why does the hat have red eyes?

Offline Bizman

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Re: The Cleanest Joke in the World
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2013, 12:09:43 PM »
I don't get it. Why does the hat have red eyes?
Apparently some people like them.