Honor, chivalry, the code ... worst thing that any individual or group pretended existed as a universal standard in the game.
Behaving in a specific manner, as an individual or group, is up to said individual or group. Fine.
Your expectations are yours to keep, realistically or otherwise.
When your specific code leads you to publicly ridicule other players for having different expectations or for falling outside your
expectations then it ceases to serve it's intended purpose. It will actually be more wearisome than the perceived failure of others.
If you want to set a tone ... let the tone speak for itself.