Sorry you have had such a bad experience. Ive always found help from other players and feel bad to read that you were treated poorly. Remember most of us are simply video game dweebs not fighter pilots. The callus nature of the knights and other squads Is most likely the result of those players "playing the game at they like". Teamwork and follow my idea goals will often lead you nowhere and that is just the nature of the community. If you keep looking you will find people to play with and knowledgeable players that would be happy to help you. Again, if you just dont expect much cooperation from other gamers, you can save some stress, they are busy and seasoned to withstand noob crys. Its really a shame the community has dissolved to the point of isolationism and cold hartedness as a norm. With positive change we can hope more players will be drawn in to enrich the community. Unfortunately, those new players will take time to gain skill. heck it took me 4 months to get a kill and 7 months to find out about zoom control. Finally, understand if a opposing player gets mad at you thats the way it goes. Nobody likes to get hoed, killed, rammed, bombed, vulched, or having their hangers down or base taken, or warping. Thats all part of the game and the whiners loss.
Best of luck