I don't think you can do friendly collisions. That would take hours to take off and coordinate. We like to skip to the combat recreation, not the minutae.
As for single life: We've done scenarios like that before, if I recall. FSO does it every week, almost.
Rant on:
As for the AvA, the no-icons was a holdover from IL2 fans that liked to tout it as a superiority indicator that they were supreme and anybody else was inferior and other logical fallacies based on arbitrary handicaps. That's why the big forum discussion. It always boiled down to facts, science, history, reality, practicality on the one side vs the "I'm better than you and you just can't hack it" on the other side. So... those conversations stopped because they weren't conversations. The no-icons folks took over the AvA for a while and it's been pretty dead in terms of discussion since then.
There is no realism in no or resticted icons. In reality, you could see enemy planes if you looked towards them. You could tell how many, what direction, an idea of what type, the markings, the fuselage codes from very long distances, even. In this game if you put short icons on, a "dot" is within lethal guns range before you can identify it has 1 or 2 engines let alone anything else.
In WW2 there were maneuvers and posturing before you got into guns range, you could set your terms for combat by turning into a fight, flying parallel away from something, or merging gradually into it. What the short 1.5k icons recreate is nothing like that and all thought and planning and care go out the window. When one group sees the other the only thing they can do is bounce them. That's it. IMO that made many an FSO a terrible thing to fly. Took all the intellect out of it and it was just following orders and random luck that put you in position to bounce or to be bounced.
Even in scenarios where we have 3k icons that's pushing it.
Rant off.
As for everything else on your list, yes we've had them all at some point or another. Remember the old BOB where you had to get "rescued" to save your life, and that let you get back into the fight after a delay? Otherwise you were out. Most have long down times so things stay down between frames. We've also done limited planesets before where you had X planes of one quality and if they were gone you got degraded. Malta had fixed 109Fs and if you lost your plane and it wasn't servicable you only got a 109E to take off in. There was a MASSIVE lag spike as 90% of the 20+ pilots near me were on final -- new update version and there was a stutter as certain ground things rendered -- most of us dinged our props and were landed 100% safe but lost our planes and had to roll 109Es. Most don't have dot dar, but when it is on it is to simulate the minutae of friendly radar control stations telling you where friendly forces were, and being properly briefed before flight, etc, but without dedicating some poor saps to do nothing but that.
So, yes, aside from the icons, we've done almost all of those at some point, and if you want to write up an idea that combines a lot of them, feel free to work on it. Most scenarios I've seen are a lot more "hard core" than the recent BOB was. The 12-hour ones follow a different format. The 4-frame ones are a lot more demanding and tense.