Another solution would be to wait until the people on chanel one at least hit puberty, and better yet, wait until they get laid.
Of course fir former will take ten years or so, and the latter (we can hope) won't ever happen outside the inflate-a-barnyard store. By then there'll be a whole new crop of 1337 h4x0rz ready to take up the mantle.
I, of course, must be getting old, because I don't have the patience to deal with children anymore. The older I get the happier I am I never had any.
YMMV.