Author Topic: A whole new form of "Engrish"  (Read 570 times)

Offline Pei

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« on: December 09, 2003, 01:09:48 AM »
from http://entertainment.tv.yahoo.com/entnews/wwn/20031204/107055000003.html

Bogus Dictionary Lands Tourists In Trouble!
Thursday December 4, 2003

A practical joker has stirred up trouble by publishing a Japanese-to-English phrase book with incorrect definitions for every phrase!

Now thousands of Japanese tourists who've painstakingly studied the bogus dictionary in preparation for trips to America are arriving on our shores only to encounter blank stares, hysterical laughter or even brutal beatings as soon as they open their mouths.

"The man who compiled this dictionary clearly went out of his way to wreak havoc," says New York hotel concierge Jacqueline Porseman, who arranges tours for many VIP guests from Japan.

"For instance, when the Japanese think they're asking 'Can you direct me to the rest room?' the book actually has them saying, 'Excuse me, may I caress your buttocks?'

"And, the phrase for 'I am very pleased to meet you' is given as 'My friend, your breath could knock over a water buffalo.'"

At least 50,000 copies of the book have been sold in Japan in the past year and while the Japanese government has pulled the plug on further sales, copies still turn up in used bookstores and bargain-hunters snap them up.

"This is not a funny matter to us," says Hiro Suzuki of the Japanese embassy. "Our citizens who look forward to a pleasurable time in America are being laughed at, spat upon, roughed up and humiliated without knowing what they said wrong. Tourists have been found beaten to a pulp on street corners with this terrible phrase book still in their hands."

Among the nearly 2,300 incidents reported to the embassy:

    * A 29-year-old Tokyo man visiting San Francisco for the first time meant to ask a female store clerk, "May I please have film for my camera?" But what he actually said was, "Would you place your copious breasts in my mouth?" He was slapped in the face, then got tossed out by the manager.
    * Four family members from Osaka were thrilled see their favorite American singer coming out of a ritzy store in Beverly Hills. While waving frantically, they shouted out what they believed to be, "We love you so much." Unfortunately, what they really said was, "We're here to take your head." The four were arrested and detained for six hours by police.
    * A 45-year-old tourist from Okinawa looking for the legendary Apollo Theater in Harlem thought he was asking a group of young men, "I am lost. Which way is uptown?" In reality, he said, "I know martial arts. May I kick your ass?" He was chased five blocks before being rescued by police.

No one knows who's behind the elaborate hoax. Some suspect the editor-publisher of the book, identified only as "M.L. Tanaka," is a disgruntled former Japanese tourism official. Others insist the culprit is a U.S. autoworker who lost his job to Japan in the '80s.

Says Porseman, "If it's an American, I wonder how 'funny' he thinks it would be to visit a Sumo wrestling gym in Tokyo and think he's saying 'You guys are the best, keep it up,' when he's really saying, 'You have fat butts. Sit on my head.'

"It's not so amusing when the shoe is on the other foot, is it?"

Offline FUNKED1

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2003, 01:12:04 AM »
LOL, Weekly World News rules.  :)
For some real fun, Google for Ed Anger.

Offline Raubvogel

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #2 on: December 09, 2003, 01:12:54 AM »
That is the greatest news this year! The person responsible has an honorary lifetime membership in the FDBs! *pending final approval from someone.

Offline Tarmac

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #3 on: December 09, 2003, 01:25:13 AM »
As someone who solo'd through northern France with only one of those books to help me communicate, this is absolutely horrible.  Horrible like clubbing baby seals.  But much like clubbing baby seals, it's also hilarious.

Offline lazs2

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #4 on: December 09, 2003, 08:21:27 AM »
funny no matter how you wear your shoes.

lazs

Offline NUKE

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #5 on: December 09, 2003, 08:49:49 AM »
It's funny but doesn't ring true.

Most Japanese have more years of English in school than Americans :)

Offline eskimo2

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #6 on: December 09, 2003, 08:48:04 PM »
This was a terrible stunt that could seriously damage relations between the US and Japan.  Just as bad, some innocent tourists were beat up and humiliated.  All this aside, the guy who made and sold these dictionaries is way at the top of my hero list.  This is one of the greatest pranks in the history of mankind.  

eskimo

Offline vorticon

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #7 on: December 09, 2003, 08:54:16 PM »
LOL...best prank EVER


but it was kinda evil...lets put some texas justice to the guy who did it

Offline FUNKED1

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #8 on: December 09, 2003, 09:06:11 PM »
It's from WWN guys.

Offline Pei

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #9 on: December 09, 2003, 09:45:02 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by FUNKED1
It's from WWN guys.


How dare you spoil an O' Club thread with relevant infomration? Have you no sensibilities whatsoever?

Offline Raubvogel

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #10 on: December 09, 2003, 11:05:41 PM »
How's Bat Boy doing this week Pei?

Is Saddam still using that Hitler clone?

I love the WWN :aok

Offline FUNKED1

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #11 on: December 09, 2003, 11:19:17 PM »
Sorry Pei.  :)

Offline Montezuma

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #12 on: December 10, 2003, 02:03:09 AM »
My hovercraft is full of eels.

Offline boxboy28

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #13 on: December 10, 2003, 11:17:25 AM »
have you visited this site  funny stuff here!

http://engrish.com/
^"^Nazgul^"^    fly with the undead!
Jaxxo got nice tata's  and Lyric is Andre the giant with blond hair!

Offline Dago

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A whole new form of "Engrish"
« Reply #14 on: December 10, 2003, 11:27:13 AM »
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"