my mom emailed me this one. I thaught it was pretty good! (sorry i was too lazy to take out all the >'s)
> Subject: Raising Boys
>
>
> a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!
> >
> >b) For those who already have children past this age, this is
>hilarious.
> >
> >c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
> >
> >d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
> >
> >e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.
> >
> >
> >
> >The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...
> >
> >
> >
> >Things I've learned from my Boy's (honest and not kidding):
> >
> >
> >
> >1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft house
>4
> >inches deep.
> >
> >
> >
> >2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
>Roller
> >blades, they can ignite.
> >
> >
> >
> >3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
> >restaurant.
> >
> >
> >
> >4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
> >enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman
> >cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread
>paint
> >on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
> >
> >
> >
> >5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
>using
> >a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
>before you
> >get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
> >
> >
> >
> >6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
>by a
> >ceiling fan.
> >
> >
> >
> >7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already
>too
> >late.
> >
> >
> >
> >8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
> >
> >
> >
> >9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
> >36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
> >
> >
> >
> >10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year
>old
> >Boy.
> >
> >
> >
> >11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
> >
> >
> >
> >12.) Super glue is forever.
> >
> >
> >
> >13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
>can't
> >walk on water.
> >
> >
> >
> >14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
> >
> >
> >
> >15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials
>show
> >they do.
> >
> >
> >
> >16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
> >
> >
> >
> >17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
> >
> >
> >
> >18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
> >
> >
> >
> >19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
>like
> >ovens.
> >
> >
> >
> >20.) The fire department in La Mesa, CA has a 5-minute response time.
> >
> >
> >
> >21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
>dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
> >
> >
> >
> >Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without
> >kids.
