Alright fellas, its about time I tell you all the truth.
I am a viper pilot. Yep, thats right. I fly F-16s for a living. But dont try to look my name up on the air force registry. I am top secret covert ops with the Central Intelligence Agency. Opps, I may have told too much. Might as well spill the beans now.
I have two kills from the Gulf War. Yeah, thats right, I am almost an ace. I shot down two Iraqi helos. Blew them whirley birds right out of the sky.
However, its not all fun and games. I had to punch out of my viper over the desert. I pulled the handle beneath my legs, and went flying out of the jet end over end. And wouldnt you know it, I landed right on top of a dam scorpion nest. They stung me so bad my heart stopped beating 3 times. Had to give myself CPR.
But anyways, now that you know who I am, I am starting a software company. If you would like to get rich, just send your initial investment of $3000 to me. Btw, I fly B-17s and P-51s in real life, so I know how to make a flight sim.