They'd Use It on Us'

[Gunslinger]

This article made me LMAO    

They'd Use It on Us'
Our columnist imagines how human rights groups might react if 'The Dukes of Hazzard' was deployed as an interrogation tool at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

WEB-EXCLUSIVE COMMENTARY
By Andy Borowitz
Newsweek
Updated: 1:33 p.m. ET Aug. 9, 2005



Aug. 9, 2005 - Human rights groups around the world cried foul today amid reports that the movie version of "The Dukes of Hazzard" is being used by interrogators at the U.S. detention center in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

According to reports, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld arranged for a private screening of the film at the Pentagon in mid-July and determined that it could be a powerful tool for extracting information from enemy combatants.

Over the weekend, when "Dukes" appeared on nearly 4,000 screens nationwide, it also appeared in at least 12 interrogation rooms at Guantanamo, playing on a nonstop loop.

"We have never seen anything like it," said one Guantanamo interrogator, speaking on condition of anonymity. "About 10 minutes into the film, the prisoners are already willing to talk."

But even as interrogators praised "Dukes" as a welcome addition to their tactical arsenal, human rights groups such as Amnesty International blasted the U.S. government for using the film, arguing that the practice could be in violation of the Geneva Conventions against torture. "We see the use of 'The Dukes of Hazzard' as part of a larger pattern of abuse," said Amnesty International spokesperson Jean-Claude Guinod, noting that the United States had used the film "Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed" at Guantanamo in 2004.

At the Pentagon, Secretary Rumsfeld categorically defended the use of the "Dukes" film, telling reporters, "Don't think for a moment that if the enemy had 'The Dukes of Hazzard' they wouldn't use it on us."

Elsewhere, NASA pronounced the just-completed space shuttle mission a success, saying that the Discovery astronauts had made important scientific discoveries about foam debris, missing tiles and weather delays.

(c) 2005 Newsweek, Inc.
(c) 2005 MSNBC.com

URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8885198/site/newsweek/

This idiots really need to learn about "abuse" and "torture"

[SaburoS]

LOLOL!

The writer has a good imagination

[VOR]

TEH FUNNAY!!