O’Hare Approach Control to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.” United 239: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this… I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”
There’s a story about the military pilot calling for a priority landing because his single-engine jet fighter was running “a bit peaked.” Air Traffic Control told the fighter jock that he was number two, behind an eight engined B-52 that had one engine shut down. “Ah,” the fighter pilot remarked, “the dreaded seven-engine approach.”
From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored.”
Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!”
Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f…ing bored, not f…ing stupid.”
