Let me preface these comments by saying that I have spent 25 years in coaching athletes of all ages in a variety of sports. I myself am/was a competitive athlete.
Winning and losing are intertwined, you cannot have one without the other. That is a fact of life. Sports, as a metaphor for life, reflect this fact. If you play long enough, you lose in either one.
No one ever said you need to enjoy defeat; the important thing is that you learn something from it. A mistake unexamined is a lesson unlearned. You will, as the adage says "repeat history".
You actually have tapped into something here, though I doubt it is what you intended. Why do you think there is so much whining on open channel? Easy- there are many on who have not learned that you will lose a fight once in a while, no matter how good you are. Tough as it is, it is far better to salute the guy, try to figure out how he bested you, and apply that knowledge towards the next fight. You show class that way. Some fellows here seem to take loss so hard they have to diminish the efforts of the guy that bested them in order to keep self-esteem. Some of the best pilots of the game are the worst in this respect. That is a line I never want to cross, and if being the "best" means I have to go that far, well, I will never be the best then.
In my current coaching, I expect the athletes (cross-country) to tell me how they thought their races went. I don't accept what you typically hear when things go wrong ("It was crap!"), I want to hear what went wrong AND what went right. This gives a point of reference to begin planning for the next event and keeps things on a positive spin.
Now, take your Nickelodean commercial- those athletes weren't seeking to lose at the outset, right? They did find themselves in a situation where losing was pretty much inevitable. What should they do, rush the opposing bench for a brawl? Start hurling slurs? Or do they play the game out and hold their heads up when they leave? Frankly, I have been in that situation, and I think you only got to see the snapshot of the moment. As was said before, I would be interested in how the next day at practice went before I passed judgement on the message. Taking a bunch of 10-year-olds out and telling them they are dirt for losing sounds like a self-destructive tactic. Anyone can scream at a losing team; great coaches can find something positive in any situation.
One more thought for you concerning that commercial- you can have tons of knowledge, and you can even be the best at what you do and still fail as a teacher/coach. If you cannot formulate a message in a manner that your audience will accept it, you will fail. I speak from 15 years as a teacher when I say that screaming doesn't work if done regularly- any parent will tell you the same. Kids tune you out, as will adults. Far better to approach with a message the kids will buy into, then bring them around, show them you are right. In the end you must win their respect, then you have their ears.
