In most parts of the US, a good pizza simply not available. The same goes for Europe North of the Alps.
The reason is simple: Most people -- Italians included -- consider pizza to be humble fare, not worthy of a lavish meal. You know, it's pizza. So most places compete on the price and thin margins. Immigrant labor is one way to compete on the price. If said immigrants are sicilians or neapolitans, you might get a good pizza. If their notion of pizza is "Lahmajun with cheese" or "a gringo Tostada", you probably won't, especially if the owner is not an immigrant (the owner might very well be enlightened and a fair employer, but more likely, he's pinching pennies everywhere he can)..
In short, if everyone is competing to bring you the cheapest, fastest pizza, nobody's gonna try to give you one that actually tastes good. That's why thy try to sell the pizza on the quality of the toppings: because the fundamentals, the dough, the sauce and the cheese, are crap. You can't have a winning game plan with crappy fundamentals.
So what do you do?
Well, first you buy a rock and a peel. A rock (sometimes called a "pizza stone") will set you back all of $20, the price of one large pizza. It should be square and as thick as possible. Chances are you'll have to make do with a round and thin one. No biggie.
Second, you learn how to make pizza dough, from flour, yeast, water and olive oil. I just walked into the other room and made some -- it takes 5 minutes, less time that it takes to bicker over what toppings to put on.
Third, you grab some tomato sauce, some full-milk, full-fat, god-fearing mozzarella balls (the kind that comes in liquid), some parmesan, and the toppings that God and your friends command: no little "sausage turds" here -- but pepperoni, a proper spicy sausage, merguez, or whatever else you can get that you know tastes good.
When the rock is hot and the dough ready, you make the pizza that you want to eat. It takes practically no time, and you need a really good pizzeria to beat it.
