Originally posted by Oldman731
The CIA had an opening for an assassin.
Voss unavilable?
Ok, here's one I found on the inside of a P.J. O'Rourke Book:
It was the middle of the Depression, and a young man had left his family's farm to look for work in the big city. He stood by the side of the highway with his thumb out, hoping to get a ride.
A big red sedan stopped next to him, and a fat man in a suit asked him, "Son, are you a Democrat or a Republican"?
"A Democrat!" the boy said proudly.
And the car drove away in a burst of gravel.
A few minutes later, another car stops, this time an old green Ford driven by a little old lady. She points her round glasses at the young man and asks, "You a Republican or a Democrat?"
"I'm a Democrat, ma'am," replies our polite hero.
And she drives off just as quickly as the fat man did.
Now, this happens several more times, until our young man decides that maybe it's time to switch his political allegiance, just to get somewhere. So, when a cream-colored roadster pulls up, driven by a gorgeous blonde, he's ready with his new answer.
"Did you vote for Roosevelt?" the blonde asks him.
"No way!" he replies. "I'm a Republican!"
"Well, climb in," the blonde tells him, and he scrambles into the passenger seat, dropping his battered cardboard suitcase behind him.
The blonde pulls out, and hits the gas. The wind blows her hair out behind her face as the car picks up speed, and her thin blouse settles back further on her shoulders, drawing the boy's eye to her cleavage. She moves her legs to shift, and her skirt starts sliding up her long, gorgeous legs.
The boy swallows hard, then shouts: "Stop the car! Let me out! I've only been a Republican five minutes and I already want to screw someone!"
