Guppy,
I remember speaking with you about this in a previous thread several months ago. It grieves me that you have had to face such a loss. Every time one of my sons walks out the door to go somewhere I have a moment of dread, fearing what "may" happen to them.
As I stated in that other thread, I have known several people who have had experiences similar to your wife's. In every case, it was a positive one, and gave them great comfort. In the case of my brother-in-law and his wife, both experienced the presence of their lost two year old son. At about the same time, my grandfather passed away. When my wife related the story about my brother-in-law's experience to her, to get the benefit of her insights, she sat in shock for a moment, hand over her mouth, and with tears in her eyes said that she had had a similar experience with my grandad.
I could relate others, but that really is not the reason I'm posting. I would like to offer you some comfort. I have thought about those incidences quite often over the years, and being of a religious upbringing, have tried to relate them to what I believe about what happens after death.
It is "not" the end. I have seen enough in this life to convince me that there is a loving God actively involved in the events of our lives. These encounters are "miracles," sent in love to provide comfort and HOPE in a time of loss. While you may not have experienced the same things that your wife has, I firmly believe that they are meant for you as well. Take comfort in that, and the next time she experiences the presence of your children, hold her close, and accept this as a sign that your family's separation and loss are not permanent.
Regards, Shuckins