Author Topic: If Chuck Norris were president (written by Chuck) (Read 436 times)

Chairboy · « **on:** June 11, 2007, 05:34:14 PM »

Well, Chuck has laid out his platform, and it's a doozy:

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/staticarticles/article56107.html

Masherbrum · « **Reply #1 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:12:30 PM »

Chuck Norris is a tool.

VOR · « **Reply #2 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:17:27 PM »

Some of those were funny, others could use a bit of embellishment. It seems a certain somebody is feeling a bit left out now that Chuck Norris jokes aren't in style anymore.

Serenity · « **Reply #3 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:18:17 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by VOR
Some of those were funny, others could use a bit of embellishment. It seems a certain somebody is feeling a bit left out now that Chuck Norris jokes aren't in style anymore.

eh... GF just bought me an awesome chuck norris shirt yesterday... funniest stuff ive seen in a LONG time! lol.

VOR · « **Reply #4 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:19:25 PM »

Is it the Lifetime of Achievement shirt? Man I want that one actually, but not enough to actually pay for it.

Serenity · « **Reply #5 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:49:27 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by VOR
Is it the Lifetime of Achievement shirt? Man I want that one actually, but not enough to actually pay for it.

No, 'Things you need to know about chuck norris'

Stuff like:

Chuck norris doesnt tea-bag girls, he potato-sacks them
Chuck norris sleeps with a nightlight because the dark is afraid of chuck norris
The quickest way to a man's heart is through chuck norris' fist
Chuck norris isnt hung like a horse, horses are hung like chuck norris
Chuck norris doesnt have hair on his balls because hair doesnt grow on steel
When chuck norris does pushups he doesnt push himself up, he pushes the world down

yeah, its funny, lol. Its on my list of top 3 shirts to own!

Meatwad · « **Reply #6 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:50:00 PM »

Increase jobs in America by sending ninja teams to sabotage and steal them back from other countries.

Now thats what im talkin about

AKIron · « **Reply #7 on:** June 11, 2007, 06:58:57 PM »

"Looking over my campaign promises, I'm sure my liberal friends are even now rejoicing that I'm not really running for president. However, my hope is still out that Newt will jump into the race!"

Run Newt, run!

Airscrew · « **Reply #8 on:** June 12, 2007, 08:41:20 AM »

Quote

Convey my plan for world peace to the United Nations: taking the governor of California with me on our "kick butt and ask questions later" USO world tour

Shuckins · « **Reply #9 on:** June 12, 2007, 08:50:29 AM »

Chuck Norris' toilet paper.

bigUC · « **Reply #10 on:** June 12, 2007, 09:07:22 AM »

Chuck Norrris' di** is so big that it has it's own di** and even that di** is bigger than your di**