Author Topic: Breaking News: Government Conspiracy Uncovered! (Read 713 times)

rpm · « **on:** August 20, 2007, 11:53:31 PM »

link
The systematic unweaving of the American fabric by liberals was uncovered by the great patriot Steven Segal.

It's a sad day in American when a talented master thespian like Stephen Segal is cut down in his prime and deprived of a living by the government.

Ghosth · « **Reply #1 on:** August 21, 2007, 06:10:31 AM »

Now don't get me wrong, I used to like Steven Segal Movies.

However the facts remain.

He's gotten fat.
He's gotten Slow.
He's so fat and slow he can't make it look real anymore.

So, his movies don't sell anymore.

Nice try blaming it on the FBI, but no cigar here.

Steven dude, sit in the directors chair if thats what you like.
But get out from in front of the camera if its an action film.

Or reinvent yourself, hollywood people do it every day.
Stevel Segal the Metaphysical Guru, I don't care.

But don't blame the goverment because you had poor choice in friends.

Max · « **Reply #2 on:** August 21, 2007, 08:19:56 AM »

Let's not forget the fact that Segal is such a bad actor, he makes Chuck Norris look like Anthony Hopkins

lazs2 · « **Reply #3 on:** August 21, 2007, 08:36:41 AM »

the haircut and raincoat don't help either.

lazs

Shifty · « **Reply #4 on:** August 21, 2007, 08:53:33 AM »

Wait a minute.

I've gotten fatter...

I've gotten slower....

DAMN YOU FBI!

Ripsnort · « **Reply #5 on:** August 21, 2007, 08:55:59 AM »

Segal used to own a big ranch near our property in Montana. He beat his wife up and she sued him (after divorce). Then, he sent his BODYGUARD to beat her up after she won the lawsuit. Most hollywood types would try to blend in the the general population in Ennis, MT (the site of Lonesome Dove 1 and 2, parts of a "River runs through it", Gunsmoke, a couple other movies) but not Segal. He'd come to town in his city slicker clothes, driven by Limo. Folks in Ennis would shake their heads. He finally sold the ranch in Ennis (working ranch that he'd stop and visit now and then, flying in to the airport in his private plane)

LePaul · « **Reply #6 on:** August 21, 2007, 10:10:59 AM »

Poor rpm, spinning and spinning and still saying a whole lot of nothing

You should be duct taped to a chair and made to watch his last 5 "feature" films on a Spike Marathon sometime. After said shows, you'll plead to watch a "My Pretty Pony" marathon versus anything Segal ever again

Maverick · « **Reply #7 on:** August 21, 2007, 10:28:41 AM »

LePaul,

I think you missed the (tm) part of RPM's post.

As far as segal's "acting" is concerned you guys should be ashamed!! He's an "arteest" after all!:mad:

Airscrew · « **Reply #8 on:** August 21, 2007, 10:56:48 AM »

Steven Segal is still alive??

Yeager · « **Reply #9 on:** August 21, 2007, 10:57:48 AM »

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.......

SIK1 · « **Reply #10 on:** August 21, 2007, 11:06:18 AM »

Steven Segal made one good movie "Above the Law" the rest were, well how do I say this nicely, carp.

And yes he has gotten fat, and slow, and I'm sure the government had something to do with it. After all they are responsable for all things that go wrong in this country. Has to be Booosh's fault.

Maverick · « **Reply #11 on:** August 21, 2007, 01:17:52 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by SIK1
Steven Segal made one good movie "Above the Law" the rest were, well how do I say this nicely, carp.

Of course you know, that's an insult to carp the world over. You'd best be careful the next time you go swimming!

morfiend · « **Reply #12 on:** August 21, 2007, 04:40:32 PM »

FBI,???? fat balding idiot.....
Aikijujitsu is a get matial art,too bad he used it on his former wife!!!!!

Shuckins · « **Reply #13 on:** August 21, 2007, 04:43:21 PM »

Furball · « **Reply #14 on:** August 21, 2007, 04:58:49 PM »

hmmm...