Time Outs

[Rondar]

A parenting thread by LePaul made me think of this.  

Does anybody have any success using time outs for correcting children???  We go to walmart, restaurants, well literally anywhere and seems kids are out of control.  A person cannot go to walmart at any time and have any peace of mind whilst shopping as kids all over the store scream, cry, throw temper tantrums, mess with literally anything they can get their hands on.  

When I grew up, and my folks told me to do something, I did it.  We knew if we didnt, we would pay the price.  It is my opinion that good old fashioned swats could do a lot of good for some of these youngsters.  We also respected our elders and didnt talk to them like kids talk now.   To me it gets a lot frustrating when kids get away with all of this stuff and if you look at them crosseyed, you may get arrested for child abuse it seems.  My kids (except my youngest 21 yo daughter) are appalled at the way most other kids are acting for the most part.  Even my 21yo knows how to act properly, she just likes to try to dress like some of her friends.

If these kids act like this in public, what are they like at home to deal with?  It would be hard to be a teacher and have kids in class who know you cant do anything about their behavior.  

Ahhhhh I'm glad we had ours early in life and time outs were in ballgames.

[Tigeress]

Some parents are the real ones who need training.

Children are not all that hard to control most of the time... but it begins at home.

"Quiet Time" is effective if done right.
 
TIGERESS

[lasersailor184]

Originally posted by Rondar
A parenting thread by LePaul made me think of this.  

Does anybody have any success using time outs for correcting children???  We go to walmart, restaurants, well literally anywhere and seems kids are out of control.  A person cannot go to walmart at any time and have any peace of mind whilst shopping as kids all over the store scream, cry, throw temper tantrums, mess with literally anything they can get their hands on.  

When I grew up, and my folks told me to do something, I did it.  We knew if we didnt, we would pay the price.  It is my opinion that good old fashioned swats could do a lot of good for some of these youngsters.  We also respected our elders and didnt talk to them like kids talk now.   To me it gets a lot frustrating when kids get away with all of this stuff and if you look at them crosseyed, you may get arrested for child abuse it seems.  My kids (except my youngest 21 yo daughter) are appalled at the way most other kids are acting for the most part.  Even my 21yo knows how to act properly, she just likes to try to dress like some of her friends.

If these kids act like this in public, what are they like at home to deal with?  It would be hard to be a teacher and have kids in class who know you cant do anything about their behavior.  

Ahhhhh I'm glad we had ours early in life and time outs were in ballgames.

 I'm a (reasonably) well behaved 22 y.o. Engineering Student.  What kind of scotch would purchase an introduction?

[Meatwad]

I never got time outs, just beat with a switch when I was bad.

[Thrawn]

Disciplinary action should be a natural consequence of age inappropriate behaviour.


IE:  A five year old that purposefully embeds playdough into a carpet doesn't get to play with playdough for a given amount of time.  The discipline is a natural consequence, giving her a time out wouldn't be.

The discipline must be confectioned to the age inappropriate behavour in order for the learning process to work effectively.

[Gunslinger]

With my two kids the best "time out" punishment was the chair.  They are 5 and 8 and when I don't feel the punishment requires a beating I place them in chairs in the kitchen faceing eachother but 6-8 feet away from eachother for about 10 minutes.  

They are not allowed to talk or move or further punishment will result.  THEY ABSOLUTLY HATE THIS!  wich is what makes it so effective.

However, most parents mistakes do not fall in the lack of punishment catagory but rather the lack of consistancy.  Children from a very early age need to have engrained apon them that actions have consequences.  In that if you do "A" then "B" will happen to you.  It needs to happen EVERY SINGLE TIME for that punishment to become effective.  

Too many parents today are not willing to leave a cart full of groceries sitting in the isle to take their kids home and apply effective punishment for acting up in the store.  

As for my kids....they've learned the HARD way that in public.....its twice as bad.  I simply say "do I need to take you to the bathroom"  (wich is were we beat them) and instant improvment is acheived.  They learned that we were consistant that if they act up in stores they go to the bathroom and get a spanking......EVERY TIME!

Too many parents now a days "Excuse" bad behavior and don't apply effective punishment (what thrawn said) in a consistant mannor.

[Thrawn]

Originally posted by Thrawn
The discipline must be confectioned to the age inappropriate behavour in order for the learning process to work effectively.

I have not a ****ing clue what the word "confectioned" means.  The tard must have meant "connected".

[Bronk]

I remember when my brother was little  he refused to clean up his room.
Well he returned from school and my dad removed everything except his bed.

Dad gave him his stuff back after about a week, his rooms been spotless ever since.



Bronk

[Thrawn]

Originally posted by Gunslinger
I simply say "do I need to take you to the bathroom"  (wich is were we beat them) and instant improvment is acheived.

I hope you don't actually "beat" them.  It is not surprising that there is instant improvement, the only positive thing that corporal punishment is that it instills a desire in children to be immediately compliant to a directive.  Unfortunately it ****s up 10 other behaviours at the same time.  IE:  Tends to make them more anti-social, increases child aggression, decreases their mental health, etc.


Of course, these are generalizations.

[AquaShrimp]

Originally posted by Gunslinger
With my two kids the best "time out" punishment was the chair.  They are 5 and 8 and when I don't feel the punishment requires a beating I place them in chairs in the kitchen faceing eachother but 6-8 feet away from eachother for about 10 minutes.  

They are not allowed to talk or move or further punishment will result.  THEY ABSOLUTLY HATE THIS!  wich is what makes it so effective.

However, most parents mistakes do not fall in the lack of punishment catagory but rather the lack of consistancy.  Children from a very early age need to have engrained apon them that actions have consequences.  In that if you do "A" then "B" will happen to you.  It needs to happen EVERY SINGLE TIME for that punishment to become effective.  

Too many parents today are not willing to leave a cart full of groceries sitting in the isle to take their kids home and apply effective punishment for acting up in the store.  

As for my kids....they've learned the HARD way that in public.....its twice as bad.  I simply say "do I need to take you to the bathroom"  (wich is were we beat them) and instant improvment is acheived.  They learned that we were consistant that if they act up in stores they go to the bathroom and get a spanking......EVERY TIME!

Too many parents now a days "Excuse" bad behavior and don't apply effective punishment (what thrawn said) in a consistant mannor.

I have no doubt that your kids will grow up to respectful, well mannered citizens.

[eskimo2]

One of my favorite punishments is push-ups; even my two year old does them.  Basic, common rude behavior results in push-ups.  Our five year old used to sometimes say, “I don’t like this.” at the dinner table as soon as she sat down.  I’d respond, “Give me ten”.  If she said a word or took more than a few seconds to hit the floor I’d make it 15.  For the most part, she’s learned to keep her disappointment of the food to herself.  My eight year old can knock out 50 in no time; I don’t think she even feels the burn if it’s less.  I only make the two year old do three at a time; I think she’s ready for more.  

When they are in serious trouble, a cup of water in the face usually gets their attention.  It’s the closest thing to spanking that I do and they absolutely hate it.

For not cleaning up we sometimes take away their toys; all of them.

[Thrawn]

PS:  I don't want to sound like I'm harshing on you Gun.  These things are scaled to the amount and severity of the corporal punishment.


There is a difference between giving your child a swat on their butt from time to time to get their attention and beating them with a stick on a daily basis.

[lasersailor184]

Originally posted by Ocean27
... and a prat.

Soon to be well paid prat.

[DREDIOCK]

Depends on the kid, the circumstances  and the offence.

You have to know your kid and what works with them and when.

Some kids you could beat till they bled and it wouldnt do any good.
But taking something away that means something to them might make all the difference.

Others are the exact opposite
And then there is everything inbetween.

Also the punishment must fit the crime.
Now I have no problems swatting my kids.
But it depends what they have done.

Now Im not going to spank my kid for not cleaning their rooms like they were supposed to.
But making molitov cocktails in the park two blocks from here is another story

In one instance I had my son and my nephew in a store with me, and they started acting up with one another. Repeated demands that they knock it off  didnt work.
Doinking their heads together 3 stooges style was immediately effective.

No it wasnt hard. Just hard enough to get their attention. And it worked

On yet another instance. There was a birthday party and the kid got worked up as kids will do.
Had him sit in his room for 15 mins and after that all was fine.

I see various diciplinary methods from time outs to an in your face chewing out to few swats on the butt as being a wide range of tools at the parents disposal.

The idea is using the right tool at the right time.

[Dichotomy]

Dred are you channeling me?

Perfect.  While She Devil was gone to Hawaii I carried an airsoft pistol in a holster half as a joke.  One day the boys were acting like prats and I told them from the kitchen to cool it.  They didn't.  I warned them again and they cooled down a little bit then started to go at it again so around the corner I came 'spat spat' and a couple of red welts on the thighs got their attention.  After the shock wore off they started laughing with me and I just looked at them and said 'toldja so'.  We still laugh about it but they got the point.