Author Topic: Aviation Quotes (humor)  (Read 565 times)

Offline ForrestS

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« on: November 11, 2007, 09:57:24 AM »
The three worst things to hear in the cockpit:

The second officer says, "Oh ****!"

The first officer says, "I have an idea!"

The captain say, "Hey, watch this!"

I found this quote on a website. I thought it was perdy funny. :D





Hey, everybody — watch this!

— every redneck cropduster's last words
« Last Edit: November 11, 2007, 10:00:53 AM by ForrestS »

Offline Latrobe

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Re: Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2007, 06:33:42 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by ForrestS
The captain say, "Hey, watch this!"


:lol  Ask some pf my squadmates and they'll say "That's Latrobe"

Offline Wes14

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Re: Re: Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2007, 06:59:21 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Latrobe
:lol  Ask some pf my squadmates and they'll say "That's Latrobe"


:noid, and WTF can you do in a spitfire that warrants a "watch this"? Kamikaze a hanger with a Spit16 with bombs?  :confused:
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Offline ForrestS

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #3 on: November 23, 2007, 05:16:29 PM »
lol:D

Offline wojo71

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #4 on: November 23, 2007, 05:53:47 PM »
Latobe will take a jeep and go find a barn with a down silo,use it for a ramp and jump over the barn  etc  etc:rofl
LTARwojo        
Proud father of a U.S. Marine....Proud grandson of Lt Col Hamel Goodin (ret)   B-17 pilot. 305th BG /364th SQD

Offline Wes14

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #5 on: November 23, 2007, 06:10:57 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by wojo71
Latobe will take a jeep and go find a barn with a down silo,use it for a ramp and jump over the barn  etc  etc:rofl


Yea and ill lane a P-38 on the moon. :)
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Offline mentalguy

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #6 on: November 23, 2007, 06:13:32 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Wes14
Yea and ill lane a P-38 on the moon. :)



Been there, done that.
PFC. Corey "Mentalguy" Gibson
USMC

Offline Wes14

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #7 on: November 23, 2007, 06:16:27 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by mentalguy
Been there, done that.


Dont you fly spits, not P-38's :lol
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Offline mentalguy

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #8 on: November 23, 2007, 06:19:46 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Wes14
Dont you fly spits, not P-38's :lol



Hurri's, spits, 38s,  hogs and jugs.
PFC. Corey "Mentalguy" Gibson
USMC

Offline Wes14

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #9 on: November 23, 2007, 06:26:27 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by mentalguy
Hurri's, spits, 38s,  hogs and jugs.


all good planes.
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Offline Hornet33

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #10 on: November 23, 2007, 06:29:14 PM »
True story here.
 I was being medivaced off the ship when I had my heart attack. I was in the back of a Coast Guard HH-65 Dolphin helo on my way to Gitmo. About halfway there I hear the pilot say to the co-pilot, "That doesn't look right." to which the co-pilot responds "It's only at 5% but I'll keep my eye on it."

Mind you I'm in the back having a heart attack already but I'm still consious and listening in on the headset.

About ten minutes later the co-pilot "Showing 8% now...what do you think, an instrument problem?" The pilot "Must be, if it was real I'd be able to feel it by now."

At this point I'm more worried that the helo is going to drop out of the sky than I am about my heart so I ask them what the problem is.

The pilot "Don't worry dude, the intruments are showing an 8% tourqe split but the bird is flying just fine. Has to be an instrument problem. We're OK." (for those that don't know what this means. A tourqe split in a twin engine helo is BAD. It means the engines are not operating in sync anymore. When that happens for real there is the very real possiblity of the engine power split tearing the transmission apart because each engine is delivering different power levels to the transmission and then the helo goes out of control and crashes)

Ten mintues later the co-pilot "OK we're showing 12% and rising. The manual says we can't hover over 8%. You want to call Gitmo or do you want me to do it?" The pilot "I'll call the tower and let them know."

The pilot "Gitmo tower, CG6565, we're showing 12% tourqe splits on intruments and we cannot hover. Request a rolling landing at the airfield and request that you have the emergency crews standing by. Also request you have EMS standing by with ambulance and high speed boat to transport our patient over to the hospital since we will not be able to land at the hospital pad. ETA ten minutes."

Me in the back "WTF is going on up there guys??????"

Pilot "Relax dude, we're almost there."

Yeah right.....I'm having a heart attack inside a helicopter that can't hover, the pilot is asking for the crash crews to standby when we land, and now I'm going to have to take an abulance ride as well as a boat ride through the harbor in Gitmo at night, but I'm supposed to relax.

What the hell, I survived, but that will be my most memorable flight EVER!!! At least I can laugh about it now.:rofl
AHII Con 2006, HiTech, "This game is all about pissing off the other guy!!"

Offline Wes14

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #11 on: November 23, 2007, 06:41:14 PM »
And I thought helicopters couldn't do a rolling landing, I guess I was wrong. ;)
« Last Edit: November 23, 2007, 06:43:42 PM by Wes14 »
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Offline mentalguy

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Aviation Quotes (humor)
« Reply #12 on: November 23, 2007, 06:45:49 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Wes14
And I thought helicopters couldn't do a rolling landing, I guess I was wrong. ;)


It dont work if they have skids.
PFC. Corey "Mentalguy" Gibson
USMC