Death and the Question

[gpwurzel]

Paddy, I dont have the words to express how sorry I am to hear this - as stated above, despite all the *****ing, whining, arguing etc on this board, we will be here for you. I lost my father in '84, dec 24th - and it took ages for that pain to recede. It does tho, eventually - if you need a shoulder to cry on, or a voice on a phone, lemme know your number, or indicate if you do, and I'll pm you my number. Keep your chin up m8, remember the good times, dont hold it in (it'll come out eventually m8) and remember, you have friends here who you may not have met, but are there for you.


Wurzel

[SpaceKaddet]

Paddy,

I wish to offer my condolences for your loss.  There is no easy way to cope with the death of a friend or family member.  Sometimes the death is expected and sometimes it is not.  Either way, dying is a part of living.  Birth is the begining of our life on earth and death is the end.  I believe it is what we do between those two events that matters.  I don't believe life ends at death.  Actually, I don't believe it begins at birth.  I believe we have alway existed in some state and that this time on earth is a time to see how we treat others so we can be judged by God and return to His glory.  That said, death is a door to another existence that we can't see, just as a ship that sails over the horizon still exists but can't be seen.

I believe that life gives us experiences that will make our future existence sweeter or less sweet according to our beliefs and actions in this life.  This is an important phase, sort of a test of our character.  That is WHY we are here...to gain knowledge and to have experiences that will prepare us for the next life (Heaven, if you will).

I have lost both my father and my mother.  It was not easy to say goodbye but the sting of death is tempered by my belief that the separation is temporary and I'll be with them again.

I believe that most deaths are a consequence of our behavior or other's behavior and not a punishment from God.  I also think that if we could see the big picture of our path through eternity, birth and death would be seen like visits from out-of-town relatives.  We are happy to see come them and sad to have them go but, we know we'll see them again.  I also believe that the pain and suffering that may accompany death is forgotten in the next life just as the pain of childbirth is forgotten in this life.

Well, I've rambled on for a bit now and I hope I've not offended anyone.  I'm simply expressing my beliefs in an effort to help my friend and squadmate PaddyD.  Feel free to use what helps, if anything, and discard the rest.  I won't think less of you, no matter what you think of my comments here.

I wish you well, my friend...and peace in your heart and soul.

Spacy

[PaddyD]

Thank you spacey, you know how i am drunk.....so sorry for typo's

You have no idea what that means to me man, and my cousin, her daughter, liked what you had to say, you make much sense, and you can help us all. Through our own sad days, get by the **** we have to.

spacey, you're a good fluff'n man!

[Gunthr]

Hey Paddy, something else occurred to me.  Years ago, a girl I was shacked up with had to deal with her mom dying, then a couple days later her grandpa died and then her uncle died the next day after that.  All within one week. Due to our customs for dealing with death, we were occupied for days at funeral homes and viewings and all that crap.

Finally, it was all done.  The loved-ones were buried.  My girl friend and I, sleep deprived, went home to our apartment feeling relieved that this nightmare was finally over (this is where is gets mystical).  

We had a three dollar parakeet named Pete-y boy.  I always let Peety fly around the place if he wanted to, so I opened the door of his cage just before my girlfriend and I laid down on the bed to get some rest.  We were so tired we didn't even take our clothes off.  As soon as we laid down, the bird flew over and landed on my girlfriend's chest.  Then it waddled up to the neck of her blouse and squeezed underneath it.   The bird laid there, very still, under her blouse.  We slept.  Three hours later, we woke up and the bird was still there, under her shirt.  Next to her heart.

You asked a pretty profound question.  When I doubted God with my self-aggrandizing intelligence and worship of science, my mother explained to me very simply that God is love.   This affected me very deeply, and I believe it.  I don't think humans can sense or understand God except indirectly, and this explanation of God frees me to cope with the natural world - which for human beings, is distinctly painful.